Daddy Issues All Strings Attached (Part 1)

0:01 We are starting a brand new series today. And I'm so excited about this because this is a series that I believe God gave me. And this is February. And if you live in America or in the Western Hemisphere, this is a month that a lot of people celebrate romantic relationships. Okay. And whether you believe in it or celebrate it, it's everywhere. It's at the grocery store. It's at your job. It's everywhere. People who want to be alone and single are like, oh, my God, I hate February. Like you yelling too loud over there.

0:43 And so I thought we would take a different spin on this and represent this. Today, we're starting week one. Everybody say week one of a brand new series that we are calling All Strings Attached. attached. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All strings attached. Now, you know, usually people want relationships with no strings attached. Let me tell you, there's no such thing.

1:11 There's no such thing as a relationship with no strings attached. And as I begin to look at this, usually as a church in this month, we would, the conventional thing we would do is start teaching on marriage, dating, singleness, stalking, whatever you like to do. But I decided that we would kind of flip this thing because as a church, 2019 has a specific kind of tone for us as a church. And we just came out of a series. 2019 is the year of release. And so instead of approaching this from the same vantage point that I would usually take, I believe the Holy Spirit's given me a new angle on this. Because what I've found is that all relationships, all romantic relationships don't start at that place. They all have foundational relationships that teach them how they're supposed to act when they get to a romantic relationship. And what I've found is that a lot of the foundational relationships in our lives are damaged. Like some of the foundational relationships are our relationship with our father, like our biological, the one who had you, the one whose nose you got, okay?

2:29 That's a foundational relationship that for a lot of us in this room is damaged. We have another foundational relationship that's damaged. It's the relationship with our family. And as amazing as all of your Christmas pictures look, if we cut into that thing a little bit deeper, many of us have foundational problems in our family. And then a relationship that's a foundational relationship that's there way before we ever get into romantic relationship is our friendships. And how friendships are done in our lives from grade school to middle school to high school to college, all of those things are foundations to how we will act in romantic relationships. And so instead of talking about relationship goals today, like, oh my God, yeah, I want her to be 6'5". I want her to have dark hair. I want her to be, you know, pop, pop, poppy.

3:30 Like, instead of all of that, and you're like, bro, I don't even care what she, I don't even care, bro. All I need her to be is cute in the face, tiny in the waist. Like, I don't care. No, bro, I just want her to be woke and like no I don't care I don't care what your preference is for this series let's not talk about relationship goals for this series I want God to release or heal or deliver or or bring a new level of intentionality and strength to your relationship soul like I want your mind your will and your emotions when it comes to relationships to be healed. Everybody say healed. Yeah. Cause it doesn't matter if God brings you the dream thing. If you're broken, you'll contaminate it. If you're hurting, you'll destroy it. If you're messed up, you will somehow end up forfeiting what the great thing God had for you. And so many relationships in this room are hanging on right now by a thread, not because of relationship problems because I need everybody to know relationship problems aren't really relationship problems they're usually singleness problems that you bring to a relationship and somehow you hope and you pray that your significant other will be able to complete you or be able to bring some wholeness to that issue and they cannot Only God can fix you

5:08 Matter of fact I need to make that my first point cuz some of y'all y'all been holding your husband your wife your boyfriend and girlfriend Hostage trying to fix something they didn't create And the only way you can get something fixed is you have to go back to the manufacturer.

5:29 And so somebody needs to realize this today. As we start this series, because some of y'all have been married 55 years and you're like, I mean, we good. No, no, no, no, no, no. Y'all are in a business relationship now. he don't like you, you don't like her, it's just cheaper to keep her. You hear what I'm saying? Like, it's... Y'all want to be fake today? I'm trying to get you released. I'm trying to get you healed. Somebody shout at me, release. I need, but if we don't deal with these foundational relationships, we'll never be able to see the healing that God wants for us. So this is the thing that you need to accept right now as we start this series because there will be some surgery happening for the next three weeks. But you got to understand it's not going to be done by Pastor Mike. It's going to be done by God. And the truth is, write this point down, only God can fix me. Say that, only God can fix me.

6:26 Tell your neighbor, only God can fix me. Tell your other neighbor that you didn't pick and say, only God can fix me. Come on, find one more person, because this is helping your soul. Say, only God can fix me. And some of y'all not even saying that because you're like, ain't nothing wrong with me, Pastor Mike. I'm beautifully and wonderfully made, okay. But the reason I want you to see the rest of this, only God can fix me because only God truly knows me.

6:57 Like you got to understand that he's the only one that knows you for real inside and out. Not what you portray on the Instagram, not what you show us because we've been going, we work together. Not that. I'm talking about who really knows you. David was able to pin this in such an amazing way in Psalms 139 verse 1 through 14 And I want you to see this because I really need you to know only God can fix you because only God truly knows me David writes, oh lord You've examined my heart and know everything about me You know when I sit down, you know when I stand up, you know my thoughts watch this even when I'm far away This is so encouraging for me because some of you are in here and you're new to faith And you barely just came today because the person that your friends with told you to come and you may not be close to God, you may not believe at all. But all I want you to know is your creator still knows your thoughts and he knows you even if you're far away.

7:58 And this is the thing about our God is he doesn't want to be disconnected from you. He wants to be connected to you. Verse 3, it says, you see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do. Uh-oh. You know what i'm going to say even before I say it lord You go before me and you follow me you place your hand of blessing on my head Such knowledge is too wonderful for me too great for me to understand watch this I can never escape from your spirit I can never get away from your presence if I go up to heaven you there if I go down to the grave you there too If I ride on the wings of the morning, I dwell by the furthest or I dwell by the farthest ocean. Even there, your hand will guide me and your strength will support me. I could ask God that the darkness would hide me and the light around me would become night.

9:00 Watch how powerful this statement is. But even in darkness, I cannot hide from you. I'm trying to tell you I don't care how dark your situation is right now How bleak it looks how relationally deprived you are how far away you are from God even in your darkness You cannot hide from God to you. The night shines as bright as the day Darkness and light are the same to you. I love it You made all the delicate inner parts of my body and you knit me together in my mother's womb Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex. Your workmanship is marvelous. How well I know it. Only God can fix you. Because only God truly knows you. So when we start from that premise, like we got to talk about the foundational relationships that have damaged maybe the way that we do things now.

10:04 or maybe the ways that we've done things because all romantic relationships start in these foundational relationships that begin to form and shape who we are. And I know some of y'all read that and you said, Pastor, only God can fix me, but ain't nothing wrong with me. You heard David, he said, I'm marvelous. You heard him, he said that I'm his workmanship. You heard him, you said that I'm so complex. Okay, I'm glad you believe that. But may I suggest to you that you may have some unhealthy strings attached to you right now that started when you were a child.

10:47 Your anger is not just your anger. you're withdrawing when you get in conflict. You didn't just come up with that. Men, you shutting down when you done. Like I'm done. Don't talk to me about that no more.

11:09 You didn't just, that wasn't native to you. You running you running to pleasure when your feelings are hurt That didn't start at 22 or 42 or 52 And many times we look at the symptoms of things and never deal with the core issue And so I want to look at this And I want to look at the way that we love and I want you to write this point down because I'm laying the foundation for this entire series and I want you to I want you to write this down and I want you to commit it to your heart how you love is learned how you love is learned you maybe never thought about it before but everything that you do you learned it and so many people chomping up been like, no, no, no, this is just the way I am. But why? Why are you like, everybody say why?

12:16 So many times we deal with what, but we never ask why. And in this series, I want to deal with why you keep going from relationship to relationship. I want to deal with why you make a decision and you can't stick to it. I want to deal with everybody say why I'm going to tell you because how you love is learned. And I know a lot of us have perceptions of our family members, our fathers and our friendships. But I dare say if we take a look at a lot of these situations, there were things that we learned out of preservation or defense or just being exposed in atmosphere that now it has made up who we are and we have no idea how to change what we've always been like. It's because how we love now, how we love our kids now, how we love our spouse now, how we love our friends now, all of it was learned. And I believe that we have to go back to some of these foundational truths and figure out what God wants to say and how he wants to, Everybody say transform.

13:31 Do you know who you are right now is not how God wants you to stay? You are not the best version of yourself right now. If iPhone gets 10 upgrades, don't you at least want one? At least, at least one. 2019 needs to be your level up year. You need to at least have one upgrade this year. An upgrade in your attitude. An upgrade in your thought process. Everybody say upgrade. This is gonna be a year, but if you're gonna get an upgrade you never get an upgrade externally They have to go internal I'm preaching good already You gotta get an upgrade internally And so I want you to look at the scripture that many of us have have heard and even said before But I wanted to look at it just a little deeper and see if god can give us some revelation Proverbs chapter 22 verse 6 It says train up a child In the way he should go And when he is Oh Okay, somebody else like older not old. I'm not all When he is old He will not depart from it. How many people have heard that scripture before?

14:43 Okay, how many people have used that scripture before? Okay, okay Let me help you understand this. I've heard that all my life But when it came to this subject, it hit me in a brand new way because the question is, it says train up a child in the way he should go, and when he's old, he will not depart from it. What if you were trained wrong? So what if as a child you were trained in the way that you should go? How do you know it's the way you should go? This is inferring that it would be in the principles of the word of God and according to God's principles and what he said. But when you're sitting there watching your mom or your dad or just your mom or just your dad or your uncle or whoever raised you, You think because they love you. This is the example that I should follow. So as a child, I have been trained in the way I should go What if I was trained wrong?

15:49 Well, the scripture gives us The rest of it because if you train them in the way they should go and as a child I don't know if this is the way I should go So i'm gonna follow the training that you're saying for me So if you're angry and you're an alcoholic, you just trained me Thank you. if all I saw was you doing the wrong things with money, even though I didn't have any money, you just trained me.

16:16 If all I saw is you looking out for the interests of our family and never giving beyond yourself, you just trained me. And look what happens when you get trained. It says when they get old, old they won't depart from it The question is if you had wrong training as a child and you've never had corrective training Most of the problems that you're dealing with today That you won't depart from is because the word is working in your life You were trained to be angry you were trained to walk away when it got hard You were trained to please yourself when you were not seeing success in another area You were trained to be self-righteous and judgmental Your parents talked about everybody when you got in the car and they thought you weren't listening, but they trained you.

17:21 And that's why you come into a church and you see somebody with an issue. And the first thing you say is, how did they get in here? What's wrong with them? I'll never talk to them because you were trained in the way that you should go. And now you old and crusty. And it has not departed from you. Oh, I'm preaching up here today The question is who trained you And the question is are you still attached to their training?

17:58 And I know you probably haven't thought about it in many many years because you thought this is just how I am And you thought this is me. I'm just being honest Well, when I look at this many of you were trained to argue and fight trained to be insecure You were trained to be judgmental. You were trained to be selfish. You were trained to feel like a burden The reason why you won't ask anybody for help Is because when you were younger You may have been a sibling that that that didn't take as much and you had maybe a troubled sibling or you may have been somebody who who didn't always speak what they wanted because you felt like we didn't already have enough. So if I ask for anything, that'll be a greater burden on the family. Or you may have been abused and nobody defended you. And so when you tried to go up and try to ask for somebody to help, they told you, no, that didn't happen. Your uncle would never do that to you.

18:56 And you became a burden. And so you were trained as a child that you were a burden. And so now as an adult when you really do need help When you really do need community When you really need somebody to come and not not ask you for anything but pray for you You don't even know how to do it because you were trained in the way that you thought you should go And now you're older and you can't depart from it I know this is a lot of truth right now and I'm not trying to make light of anything But my question is to you who trained you I was telling this guy one time I told him man. I want to learn to golf and he was like a semi-pro golfer And I was like bro. I want to learn the golf and he got super serious and he was like hey one thing Do not go start practicing by yourself I was like what are you talking about? I've been to top golf before I done got my tiger woods on I done got my happy Gilmore on like what are you talking about? Don't go practice. He said no no no no no no You need to pay for somebody to train you now And I was like, I don't even know if I really want to do this yet Like I don't want to pay nobody to do it. And this is what he said and I'll never forget it He said it's better to learn the right way To then to unlearn the wrong way And many of us have brought our own golf swing to life And we've learned to do relationships our own way we've learned to deal with conflict our own way We've learned to be able to fend for ourself our own way And then he told me something that shook me to my core and it applies so heavily to what i'm talking to you about right now He said how you learn is how you'll last what he was trying to tell me is you need somebody professional to teach you even at your infant stages of how to swing it properly or you will be spending the rest of your life trying to figure

21:04 out how to undo what you learned wrong well thank god when we come to our life in christ that the Bible says if any man be in Christ, he's a new creation. My old swing, the old way that I do relationships, the old way that I've had to handle it, it can pass away. I feel the presence of God in here. And behold, I will make all things, somebody shout at me, new. So that means we can have a new way of doing relationships, But we're going to have to deal with the old things that we've learned So today I want to start this thing out and y'all I wish I had three years to talk about this one subject But I have 23 minutes, okay But one of the most significant from all studies and all all research that has been done One of the most significant cornerstone foundational relationships that everybody deals with is their relationship with their dad So the title of today's message is Daddy Issues.

22:17 Some of y'all are like, I should not have come today. I've been running from Iyanla, Dr. Phil, my counselor. Now pass the mic. Okay, can we be honest? We're a humble, open, and transparent church right now. I'm just going to ask you straight up. How many of you already know you got daddy issues? Come on. My man in the back was like me, bro. Like me, bro. Okay. Okay. And honestly, I thank everybody for your transparency. Many of us who even have dads still have daddy issues. As I begin to look at it, I've tried to find out the origin of the word dad. And even the Oxford English Dictionary does not know where the word dad came from. It started and showed up in the English language around the 1500s. And researchers did a study that once children get their T, words like ta, da, la are easy words for children to say.

23:21 And so they presume that this word dad or daddy came from baby talk. That it originated from the mouths of babes. That adults didn't come up with this word. It was children trying to express themselves. And so it was easier for them to say dad, dad. And adults would say, oh, yeah, that's your dad, dad. and and and then it translated over time to daddy and and now we have this word in our english language called dad or daddy and as i begin to just think about that concept in in the backdrop of this proverb scripture that we just read train a child in a way that that he should go well that word even came from a child dad dad and as i was looking at this i realized everybody has daddy issues everybody they're not the same daddy issues they're not synonymous your dad may have been here your dad may have been a great provider but not an emotional leader your your dad may have been absent your dad may have just been a seed donor your dad i mean everybody has daddy issues matter of fact because there's some people who are prideful and like this message is not for me i need you to write this down because this is a point today everybody has daddy issues now yours may be buried and yours may be undiscovered but everybody has daddy issues Let me give you a prime example. I'm somebody who by all standards has a great dad. Like my dad is great. And she said, yes, I do. And she wasn't even born in our household.

25:18 So I like like like I am I am the second son of five boys My dad is grace field. My dad is is a servant. My dad loves my mom for over 39 years Like I got I got by all man standards. I got a good dad But I got daddy issues You know, I can't I can't get up here and speak about anything that that that I ain't really gone through See what I found out when I was older is my propensity towards lust and sexual things What was the same demon that visited my dad and he didn't handle? And what ended up happening is my dad told me a story after I'd already had sex before I was married after I'd already been in in wrong relationships. He told me son, I had a trip that I went to New York with the Grambling State Band. And he said I was young man and I was I was still a virgin.

26:17 But he said I had I had these images and thoughts in my head. And back then they had what you call peep shows down the New York strip. Now we got internet and all this other stuff, but they have peep shows and so we walked down this street and you could have a quarter And if you put the quarter in then the blinds would would go back and you get to see a naked woman He said son. I walked down that street with a pocket full of quarters And he's telling me this after After I'm just thinking the hero But the Bible tells us that the sins of the fathers and the forefathers They come to visit the next generation if somebody doesn't stand up and say as for me in my house Like this is stopping right here And so I spent years dealing with the new version, the upgraded version.

27:20 Oh, you thought you the only thing that upgrade? Sin will upgrade in your life. Oh, come on. The attacks of the enemy will upgrade. I spent a decade battling pornography and wrong thoughts because of things that my dad dealt with but never equipped me to prepare for before I got into the situation. I got daddy issues. The only reason I'm bringing that is because your dad may have not been there. But even if you had a father in the home, we live in a fallen world. The reason I say everybody has daddy issues is because nobody's daddy is God.

28:06 Nobody's earthly father is a deity. And so they're going to be imperfect. They're going to be flawed. and we get the results of what they deal with. And because this is the foundation of many of our lives, we got to deal with our daddy issues. Let me tell you some alarming statistics, y'all, as I was looking at these things. Because the enemy's greatest attack is on marriage and fathers.

28:36 Because if he can take out the fathers out of the home and he can break up marriages, You leave little lambs open for wolves to attack The protector of the home is gone and now the nurturer has to pick up a sword And so now we're emotionally deficient because the mom can't be there for you emotionally because he has to work three or four Jobs just to survive and fight off all of these other things that are happening and now we're getting broke up from different places and different things y'all i'm talking about real stuff that you're coming in for one issue for counseling but it all is going back to the strings that are attached to us from when we were children and look at these listen to these um statistic 85 of all children who show behavior disorders come from inactive or fatherless households 85 71 of all high school dropouts come from inactive or fatherless homes.

29:43 75% and I want y'all to notice that I'm saying inactive. Like they can be there but not active. Okay, so I need everybody to hear me. 75%, 75% of all adolescent patients in chemical abuse centers come from inactive fathers or fatherless homes. 75%. 85% of all youth in prison. 85% of all youth in prison come from homes that have inactive fathers or fatherless homes. Listen to this statistic. In the U.S., 43% of all children live without their father.

30:26 Almost half of every child born in the U.S.A. will grow up without a father. Listen to this. 64 million. It's estimated that there are 64 million.3 fathers in the nation right now. And only 26 million of them come from a married family. So 40 million children come from families who have something broken in the foundation. now if you've ever built a house the most important part of building a house is not the color you're going to put on the wall it's not how high you're going to build it does anybody know what it is it's the foundation so what happens when you're born and the foundation is broken from the time you come out of your mother's womb and now you're trying to build relationships and friendships and marriages.

31:31 You're trying to build it on a broken foundation. Thank God for Jesus. No, somebody needs to thank God for Jesus. And I want you to know, if you come from a home that has a broken foundation, it's okay. You're in good company. Because there's a lot of people in the Bible who had daddy issues. Like a bunch of them, you know, Solomon had daddy issues, you know, the guy who wrote Proverbs Wisest man ever to live daddy issues. What's his daddy issues? Pastor Mike? Well, his daddy David killed His wife his his wife future wife Bathsheba his mama's First husband See y'all thought y'all drama was bad He sent him out on the front line of battle knowing he would get killed so he could do to do with his mom Talk about drama And now he's raised in a household Where he knows that them getting together was a little illegitimate the whole time Think about the daddy issues that would be there somebody else who had daddy issues is a leah had daddy issues. Leah had a father named Laban.

32:52 And Laban, he was kind of like a trickster. He was like not a good dude because he had two daughters, Rachel and Leah. And Leah was just a little more special looking than Rachel was is what the Bible said. It says she had no twinkle in her eye. Don't let nobody introduce you like that. This is my friend James. She ain't got no twinkle in her eye. Like don't let them introduce you like that. You hear me?

33:17 But Laban tricked Jacob into marrying his daughter. He was not even proud of her enough to present her in the daylight. How many of us have fathers that we could never make proud? That we were trying to live up to something and couldn't quite live up. Somebody else who had a daddy issue. You may not think about it because they came from royalty. But Jonathan had daddy issues. Jonathan was the heir to the throne. He was raised with a silver spoon in his mouth. He was a training king. But he knew in his heart that wasn't his purpose. And what happens when your dad has a plan for you that God doesn't have for you? He knew David was going to be the next king. And so he was trying to have relationship with the future king.

34:13 and he ended up dying because he never was in his full purpose. He had what? Daddy issues. One of the greatest picture of daddy issues is found in the story of the prodigal son. And if you go in there, all of these things you can find in the Bible, but it's in Luke chapter 15. You can read that whole thing and Jesus is telling this story. And he basically says there are two, there's a man, a father that has two sons. One of his sons comes to him and says hey I want all my stuff He said i'm still living the inheritance was supposed to be when i'm gone No, I want my inheritance now And he takes all of his inheritance and he goes out and he lives wild And he does what he wants to do famine comes on the lamb He basically loses everything ends up working for somebody and it's so poor so broke so messed up That he ends up eating out of a pig bin because he lost connection with his royal father.

35:12 See, the people don't understand this, that that first son didn't have to leave. He chose to leave. Just like many of us when whatever the reason, and we don't know the reason why he left. Like, we don't know if he felt like he wasn't valued. We don't know if he felt like that maybe he couldn't be all that he could be. But for some reason, he wanted to leave that home. And when he left, he squandered everything that he had. And he said, no, you know what? As he was eating pig slop, he said, even my father's hired servants eat better than this. He said, maybe I can go back to dad's house and just be a hired servant. He starts on his way back to his father's house. The other thing that you have to know is that when his daddy sees him and comes towards him, he does this extravagant, amazing thing that I'm going to talk about in a minute. But this father had another son.

36:05 And a lot of people don't talk about the other son, but that other son that was still in the house with daddy had daddy issues too. Because he saw that the other boy came back and he ain't never done nothing like him. And he ain't never been wild like him. And he ain't never been ratchet like him. I've been here the whole time, daddy. And when he heard the music start up for the party for the son coming home He said you ain't never told me no party You've never done what you did for the one who didn't obey you You've never done that for me I'm not coming to the party. I'm not celebrating anything. I'm not doing anything this son Had a a problem with rejection For somehow he was in his father's house But still did not feel like a son What happens when you are connected to your father, but you don't feel like a son or a daughter All i'm talking about is everybody got daddy issues Well pastor mike, why are you going so hard on this?

37:11 Why do we need to talk about daddy issues? Because everyone needs a father fix I didn't say a daddy fix I said a father fix See, I don't care where your relationship with your daddy is. We have a heavenly father. Who will bring whatever past relationship that you've had. And he will release you from the anger, the pain, the hurt, the disappointment, the paralyzation that you've been in. He will release you from that if you let him do it. God wants to see his people not walk around in the same bondages because of what somebody you couldn't even control did to you. What kind of situation does it look like that I have to, for the rest of my life, deal with a situation I didn't even have a decision in?

38:08 But that's why God sent Jesus. And a father sent his only son So that he could redeem all his other children whether their father was there or whether their father was gone So that they could have everybody say the father fix So if the problem is we all have daddy issues the solution is we need a father fix And i'm not talking about You going to the nursing home and telling your father that you forgive him for everything he's ever done That may be a part of your release story, but for many people your father's not here anymore For many people for many people They may be dead and gone For others. You don't you haven't talked to your mom or your dad or or they've been kept away from you What i'm saying to you this morning Is that god is offering you a father fix He's offering you not to be stuck in what you have been in But to be upgraded into his marvelous plan for you Let me help you with this look at psalms chapter 68 And pastor mike is so passionate about this Could you bring me um that rope charles The reason I call this all strings attached stay here right great quick Is because what what this looks like right now is that if that's you, and this is your father.

39:41 How you see God is only seen through the lens of your relationship with your own natural dad. So if God is here, do you understand they have the same name, Father God, Daddy God. So when you say father when you say daddy your first inclination is to think about what your natural relationship was with your actual biological dad or father. So if your dad was inconsistent.

40:22 God. Is probably inconsistent. If your dad wasn't faithful. We can sing the song you're a good good father. But in my heart I feel like he does it for everybody else But he's gonna be Inconsistent with me If your father gets angry at you and didn't have grace for you There's no way That the god of the universe Would look beyond my faults And see my needs I got whooped every time I did something bad I got punished every time I did something that wasn't like like what I want to I got I got reprimanded whatever it was When your view or your perspective of your earthly father is tainted The enemy tries to use that to taint your view of your heavenly father

41:20 And today there's people in the room who've been adopted That your parents didn't you don't even know who they are Or you felt isolated from the time you were young because they didn't even want you. Or there's other people in this room who had an amazing rescue story and God brought people into your life. But there's something that happens and you don't know who your dad is. All I'm coming to do is release you today. That it doesn't matter who your earthly father is. I'm praying that God fixes and heals that relationship. I'm praying that God delivers them and delivers you from it. But you have an opportunity not just have a daddy on earth. Through Jesus Christ, we have all been given a way to repair our foundational relationships by having a father fix. And I know some of y'all so tight bootied right now.

42:21 Y'all like, oh, I am not sure. You're not going to cry. You're not going to cry. Like I see y'all right now. Listen. Because this is real. Like this right here. This is real. But let me just tell you. Just a few things that your heavenly father. Has provided for you. Look at Psalm 68 verse 5. This is how you're going to get the father fixed. It says that our God. It's the father to the fatherless. He defends the widows. This is God. Not this big, mean person who's looking to take you out. This is God. He's the father to the fatherless. Whose dwelling is holy.

43:15 And God, this is so beautiful. And God doesn't just place the fatherless. He places the lonely in families. So you could have a father but still feel lonely in an area of your life And god says I didn't forget about you. I know you didn't have you may have been a product of rape You may have i'm talking real stuff right now You may have had the most wonderful parents in the world, but something was missing The they had a financial crisis right in the middle of your development and they weren't able to give you what you need I don't know what your daddy issue is, but I don't care what it is because there is a father fix There was a father in heaven that says do not worry about what you were given on this earth I will be the father to the fatherless And I will set the lonely I'll set you into a family and look what it says he sets the prisoners free some of y'all have been so bound but this is the year of release and he ain't just gonna set you free he's gonna give you joy there's gonna be joy you're not gonna be like i'm always missing it this is not gonna happen for me i have i didn't grow up without a father or my dad wasn't no no no no he said that he's gonna release you And he's gonna give you joy when they look around they gonna be like yours raised with both your parents, right?

44:46 No, no, no, no, no. My family was jacked up But my heavenly father Came in and he stepped in and he repaired the breach that was on the oh I need somebody to hear me He repaired the breach on the inside of me even though my father was there or he was gone or he was absent Or he was immature or he was still dealing with his own father issues Don't forget your parents are just bigger kids. who were trained as a child in the way that they should go. And when they got old, they couldn't break the string. And that's why all strings were attached. But today I just want to let you know, as I set the foundation of this, God wants to trade you all of your daddy issues for the father fix. I know it's not going to be solved in this moment right here, but I'm trying to open your heart.

45:51 That maybe who you are. Is not who you have to be. If you put more value on your heavenly father. Then your daddy issues. Today, I want to pray for you. I want to pray that God begins to do the work that your spouse can't do, that your boyfriend can't do, that your fiance can't. You tricking them right now because you crazy.

46:23 No, no, no. You know you're crazy. You know that. And you're tricking them that everything's okay with you and your baggage is going to show up. You delayed your baggage from coming till after the honeymoon. Could you, you got a U-Haul on the way. And it's coming. And you're like, no, no, I'm fine. No, honeymoon, oh my God. And then like a year and a half after y'all get married, 4 a.m., all they hear is beep, beep, beep, beep. And all your baggage is being delivered. And they're about to find out you're crazy. And most of it is because somewhere in your foundational relationships, it was damaged.

47:10 Even if you can't see it yet, I'm asking that God would reveal it over this series. I don't care what your daddy issues are. I'm believing God is going to give you the father fix. If you're in this room, this is not for everybody. I understand that. But it may be for your kids. It was like I had a great daddy But where's their father?

47:32 Come on, let's be real If this message You want to trade your daddy issues Whatever it is For the father fix Would you stand and let me pray for you At every service right now This is not for everybody But every service I want you I want you And everybody who's still seated I want you to pray for these people Because a lot of their issues Are because they need the father fix hands lifted all over this place. Come on, in the 11, in the 1, in the, I want you to hear God right now. Father, I'm praying that you would begin to do surgery on your children right now. Father, I thank you that you are a good, good Father God, and you are giving us what we need despite what we had. Father God, I thank you that you're filling in the gaps, that everything that may be deficient in us, insufficient in us hurting or lacking or broken Father I'm thanking you Father that you will show us how by your word that you will wash over us you'll give us a new identity you'll show us who we are in you and we can walk free this is the year of release and God I thank you that you start doing the work in us right now I come against every person who would try to get a hard heart and the enemy would creep in and try to give them angry feelings Father, we're in surgery right now, and I'm thanking you right now, Father, that you in this place are the father to the fatherless.

49:00 We declare and we believe, Father, even as you said in your word in Matthew 7-11, if bad people know how to give their kids good gifts, how much more would our Father in heaven do? And I break the back of the lies of the enemy. And I thank you that generational curses and generational cycles are broken in the name of Jesus. This is the year of release. I need somebody to believe it with me. This is the year that our daddy issues are fixed with the Father fixed. And God, we will give you glory. We will give you honor. And we will give you praise. Come on, y'all. Let's shout unto God. The Father, our good, good Father. We love you, God. Everybody's standing all over the building. I feel something changing and breaking in this place right now.

49:54 We've just scratched the surface on something that hasn't been touched in many of our lives for decades. But we will not be held back by our daddy issues. We're going to get the father fixed. Somebody said, we're going to get the father fixed. Come on. We're going to get the father fixed. the first way that you invite the father in to fix stuff is you invite him in the bible said he stands at the door and he knocks and i know you've been waiting at the door for a natural father so many days and he never came but your heavenly father he pursues you he come back every day just like the story of the prodigal son it's at the moment that first son turned his attention to come back home the bible says the father ran out to meet him no matter what you've done no matter how broken you've been the father is running out to meet you and all you have to do is accept him into your heart according to Romans 10 and 9 you don't got to do all these religious hoops all you have to do is say God can you come in So today i'm going to give you the opportunity to make the greatest decision of your life to invite father god Into your life Would you just bow your head and close your eyes?

51:17 This is not a religious moment. This is a moment so you can focus if god feels far away from you And you want father god to walk with you every day We're gonna say this prayer and everybody's gonna say it because nobody prays alone at transformation church We're a family. We're praying together for the benefit of those who are coming to God. But only you and Jesus know if you mean it. Everybody say, God, thank you for sending Jesus to die just for me today.