Refuel Throwback: "Make It Do What It Do" Pastor Reginald W. Sharpe Jr. Wednesday, October 19, 2022

3:12 Come with me to the book of Acts chapter 27, verse 43 and 44. Acts chapter 27, verse 43 and 44. Paul has just been shipwrecked in a storm called the Eurachlodon. Let the church say Eurachlodon. If you moonwalk backwards in your Bible to verse 14, you'll see that this storm was called Eurachlodon. This was no average storm. And so here's what happens at the end of this narrative. Here it is, Acts chapter 27, verse 43, 44. But the centurion, willing to save Paul, kept them from their purpose. He's speaking of, they were going to kill all the prisoners. Paul was a prisoner with other prisoners. but the centurion one of them said no we're gonna keep them from killing y'all today and commanded that they which could swim cast themselves first into the sea now the ship is falling apart and a centurion spoke up and said y'all ain't killing none of these folks today and then they yelled out whoever can swim jump off and get to land then verse 44 comes and the rest some on boards and some on broken pieces of the ship and so it came to pass that they escaped all safe to land.

4:30 Listen, some swam, others on boards and some on broken pieces. Are y'all with me? Some swam, others on boards and some on broken pieces. I want to talk today from this talk very simply. Make it do what it do. I need you to talk to me. I need you to talk to me whether you're watching online or whether you're in the room. I need you to talk to me. Holla at me and say, make it do what it do. Tell somebody around you, just make it do what it do. Just make it do. We come from a people who have always had to live by this saying, make it do what it do. You know what that means. Even though you're trying to act like you don't know what it means. You know what it means to make it do what it do. That's when you just have to make a way out of no way. Something's not working out, but you got to make it work anyway. That's called make it do what it do. That's called when you run out of your containers you use the I can't believe it not butter margarine container to put whatever you need that's called making it do what that's called when you can't lay your hair down the right way so you get whatever you can to put them edges down to make sure they stay when you don't have exactly what you need that's called making it do what that's called when you didn't buy the right kind of blouse and you don't want to expose too much so you go get a safety pin or you go get something you just you just put it right in the right spot so it keep y'all trying to act it's called make it do that's called when you don't have a lot of money to go to the end of the month and you have to make it stretch so instead of you getting an each dinner a new dinner every night you make a big pot of some soup a big pot of chili a big pot of spaghetti so you can stretch that thing that's called making it do i have some african-american people who understand what it means to make it do That's the beauty of HBCUs.

6:14 These were institutions that were founded before 1964, before the Civil Rights Act, when black people were not welcomed into other academic institutions in the country. These institutions were started so that black people could have somewhere to go to. So now, we are not exclusively black colleges and universities, but we are historically black colleges and universities and a lot of people now critique us for being racist no boo boo you got the story wrong we didn't start so that we could be separate we started because y'all didn't want us with you and you separated us so we decided to make it do what it do and up came schools that i just named in october a third of 1904 dr mary mcleod bethune opened the Daytona Literary and Industrial Training School for Negro Girls with $1.50, Faith in God, and five little girls. And now that school is the illustrious Bethune-Cookman University in Daytona, Florida. I'm trying to tell you, Dr. McLeod had to make it do what it do. In 1881 Spelman College watch this was started in the basement of Friendship Baptist Church in Atlanta Georgia as a seminary for females because those sisters decided we just got to make it do what it do historically black colleges and universities that's why I promote it that's why I support it Because when doors were closed for us in other areas, I appreciate our ancestors who just put nickels and dimes together, met in kitchens and basements to make sure our people had access to education.

8:10 Because we come from a people, some can swim, some on boards, and others had to make it on broken pieces. And then even when it comes to breast cancer awareness, brothers and sisters, I like some of you, maybe you won't admit it. I was trying to wonder why do we just focus on breast cancer during this month? What is the significance of breast cancer awareness? Most black churches are going to have a pink Sunday. Y'all know what I'm talking about where we pause and honor those who lost their lives to the fight. We pause and celebrate those who are in the fight and we try to give preventative information to help other sisters and brothers make sure they are prepared for the fight. I started doing some research because even when it comes to health disparities, which that word disparity only means a great difference. So whenever you see that word disparity, educational disparity, economic disparity, health disparity, policing disparity, hiring practices, disparities, that means it's a great difference.

9:18 And when it comes to black women with breast cancer, there is a great health disparity. It means it's a great difference. Researchers are studying now that black women are more likely to die from breast cancer than white women. More white women will get it, but more black women, 40% are more likely to die from it. And so I started digging. What is it about black women's beautiful bodies that allow them to be more susceptible to this fight of breast cancer? It's for a few reasons. cancer is more likely to metastasize in the body of black women that word metastasize means it's a pathogenic agent which spreads from one initial site to a different site or secondary site within the host's body so that means that the cancer is more likely to metastasize and they're doing research now and it suggests that it's because of genetics it's because of less access to mammograms and we have lower quality health care in some of the african-american communities teach sharp i'm trying so because of the less access that we have to mammograms because of the lower quality the disparities the great difference in our health care systems and because of genetics black women and because it's more likely to metastasize and move from the initial place to a secondary place this ain't something we can play with sisters so we will continue to pause and honor those who won their fight in a different way and made it on to heaven those who are in the fight right now fighting all kinds of cancers and i want to do some preventative teaching in our church so we don't just look for prescriptions once we get sick, but we can have some preventions in place to keep us from becoming sick.

11:25 Because some of us can swim, but some of us are going to make it on boards, and others of us are going to make it on broken pieces. With the issue of domestic violence, one in four women are going to face domestic partner abuse in their lifetime. One in nine men are going to face domestic partner abuse in their lifetime. This is close to me. Because last year I shared in the message that I preached, and those of you that missed it last year, go back to YouTube and Facebook and type in the message, love ain't gotta hurt like this. I spent the whole message dealing with domestic violence because I made a commitment. When I was 24 years old at my first church, the House of Hope Macon in Macon, Georgia, five months into my first pastorate, a young lady by the name of LaSmocky Fountain was killed by her boyfriend.

12:23 She was murdered by her boyfriend. She did everything right. She left the city. She tried to get away from him. You know how we say, why don't you just leave? You know there are a lot of sisters and brothers who leave and they're still in danger. yeah yeah yeah left Macon went down to Savannah but there is a period in the cycle of abuse called the honeymoon phase and he lured her back in during the honeymoon phase right before the tension building phase and bam there's an explosion that's the cycle of abuse why a lot of people get stuck I'm teaching I hope you're listening because there's a honeymoon phase where I ain't never gonna hit you again I ain't never gonna hurt you again I ain't never gonna do nothing and he got her lured her back to Macon Georgia in the honeymoon phase and exploded and killed her in her grandparents' backyard. And I never will forget, I was 24 years old, and they asked me to do the eulogy, and four children sat on the front row that were left behind after their mother was murdered by a boyfriend.

13:28 And I made a commitment to the family. There they go. Y'all give them a hand. Those young people are growing up, doing well. I'm still in contact with this family because it was such a deep deep connection I promise my church every year I'm going to pause and make sure I do some teaching on domestic violence because some of us can swim but others are going to make it on boards and some of us are going to have to make it y'all going to get it in a minute on broken pieces and so while I couldn't get to La Smocke There's some other Lesmockies and some other Shans in the room. Because it does not just affect women, it affects men too. Domestic violence is something that we have too often swept under the rug. See, disparities have affected black women when it comes to breast cancer.

14:23 Discrimination affected black people when it came to instituting African American institutions, HBCUs. discrimination kept us out of institutions and made us have to start hbcu's health care disparities have to make black women more conscientious about their health when it comes to breast cancer but the culture of silence is what's killing women and men all across this nation and so all i'm doing i can't solve it all i can't fix it all but what you won't be able to do is be a member of fellowship Chicago and say my pastor didn't have the courage to call a thing a thing and address the issues that everybody else want to keep sweeping under the rug no domestic violence is an evil that we must address I want young ladies listening to me who aren't even married and in relationships to know it is not okay for men to put their hands on you in a certain way sisters it's not okay for you to put your hands on men. Domestic violence goes both ways. One out of four women will deal with it in a lifetime. Stand up, Brandy. One, two, three, four. Stand up, Z. One, two, three, four.

15:43 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, count back. One, two, three, four. Stand up, Miss Josephine. Uh-huh. One, two, three, four. Stand up, my sister, in the hat. I mean, you so fly. Just gonna stand up. Stand up. Look at it, look at it. Just flash you want to be. What's that? What's that? What's that? Squirrel, raccoon? What is this? What is this? Mink? It's fox. See, excuse me. Listen to this. So right here in this section, one out of four. Are y'all catching the statistics? Look right here in this section. And I'm stopping before I really get started. Look at how many sisters in a lifetime could potentially face abuse. Thank you so much, my sisters. So one in four women, one in nine men will face it. Women between the ages of 18 and 24 are most commonly abused by an intimate partner. Nearly 20 people per minute, nearly 20 people per minute, let me slow down, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner. 37.7% of Illinois women will experience intimate partner physical violence sexual violence or stalking in a lifetime 25.7% of men in Illinois will deal with the same types of abuse domestic violence this this word that we overuse so often violence committed by someone in the victim's domestic circle. That's what makes it so tricky. This includes partners and ex-partners, immediate family members, other relatives, family and friends. The term domestic violence is used when there is a close relationship y'all between the abused and the abuser. Are you listening to me? And we're gonna come to church and just shout it out. We're just gonna come to church and pretend like it's not happening when I just told you one in four women in a lifetime will deal with some type of abuse and then we get real and then we get narrow-minded and parochial is the word we become

17:51 narrow-minded and we only talk about physical abuse but don't you know verbal abuse is a thing don't you know emotional abuse is a thing don't you know financial abuse is a thing don't you know mental abuse is a thing? Don't you know intimidation is a thing? Don't you know, uh oh, spiritual abuse is a thing? and why are you talking about it preacher because some of us can swim some are going to have to make it on boards, and some of us are going to make it on broken pieces. And so, so, so, so, so, so, what you want us to walk away with, preacher? I mean, you gave us the facts. You gave us the stats.

18:44 You're walking heavy. You're waking us up to things that we've been asleep about, things we've just perpetually swept under the rug. Well, a couple things, sisters, I found this article, and I want you to write this down because I want to leave you with something that's practical and helpful. Because black women, I know it's scary going to get tests. My mother didn't want to do it, but my grandmother had breast cancer. My mother lost two aunts to breast cancer. So my mother's fear of getting a mammogram kept her from going, but she had to face her fear. I found this article that says what black women need to know about breast cancer, and it was written by a black woman named Dr. Vivian B, B-E-A. Here is the four tips she wants you to hold on to And I want you to hold to You gotta know the facts You need to know the facts At the conclusion of this message I'm gonna have a resource screen that pops up on the screen At the end of the message And I'm gonna have some resources Some websites that you're able to go to You gotta know the facts Stop letting your cousin from the south side Tell you what she heard on a YouTube ad going to watch another video.

19:53 You have to know the facts and the stats. Why, preacher, do we have breast cancer wearing this month? Why do we wear pink? Because our bodies genetically are more likely to be affected. Here's another stat that we missed. Men can have breast cancer too.

20:15 You got to know the facts. Number two, you got to get screened, and this black sister said, and bring a friend. go get screened and bring a friend when you bring a friend it lowers your anxiety and then number three here's another one she said don't believe the myths so then some women discover that they have breast cancer and so here's what happens here's what happens they don't want to get the surgery because somebody told them if i have the surgery it's gonna spread she said that's a myth there are women that won't go get a mammogram this year or last year because they said it's COVID-19 and you have been everywhere else. Uh-oh, y'all don't like I'm too close. I'm too close. I'm too close. You got that hair done. You got them nails done. That acrylic is popping today. You got that lipstick. Huh? You been to the mall. You been to Cabo. You been to Mexico. You been like Stella and got your groove back.

21:17 Some of us, I've seen you on your Instagram story. Y'all better block me. I see it all. You been backing that thing up, dropping it like it's hot. I've seen it. You been everywhere else. But you can't go get a mammogram. Number four. See y'all's fault. Y'all let me be your pastor. It's your fault. Number four, number four, number four, number four, number four. She said know your breasts. So check. You know when something's not looking right? So what she said, don't ignore the signs. Feel. Make sure you don't feel any lumps. Make sure that there's no discoloration. Make sure there is no. make sure that there's no what's the word I'm looking for? Discharge. You understand what I'm saying?

22:09 So this black sister gave y'all the tips. Go get you. And here's what they say. Even though black women are more likely to suffer from this early detection can save lives. Why are you talking about this preacher? Because some of y'all can swim. But others are going to make it on boards. And the rest of us got to make it on broken pieces. When it comes to domestic violence, I need you to understand the cycle of abuse. Because the only way you can break a cycle is to know you in a cycle. I just said something You got to know that that cycle Honeymoon, tension building, explosion Honeymoon, tension building, explosion Honeymoon, tension building, explosion Honeymoon, tension building, explosion Somewhere along the way You got to wake yourself up And say hold on now Now we done been through this enough You done told me you wouldn't do it again You told me you were going to seek help You told me you weren't going to let it bother you that much You told me you were going to Now either you gonna go to therapy or we gonna have to figure this thing out because we can't keep going through this.

23:24 Come here brothers, let me holler at you. We always talk to the victim, but let me talk to the abuser. Who broke you down that low that you gotta now break somebody else down to feel like you somebody important? Go get yourself healed with that toxic masculinity. Usually the one pretending to be strong is the weakest in the room. I come in the name of Jesus to declare we're cycle breakers at fellowship. And we don't have to keep going through that. Your mama might have gone through it. Your aunties might have gone through it. Your daddy might have gone through it. But there's about to be an interruption in this generation.

24:06 Some can swim. Some are going to make it on boards. And some of us just got to make it. on broken pieces. Tell somebody around you, you're a cycle breaker. You're a cycle breaker. It ain't just for abuse. Whatever cycle's been in your family, I come to release you in the name of Jesus that you are a cycle breaker. The cycle of poverty, the cycle of lack, the cycle of abuse, the cycles of a sickness, the cycles of illness that you just thought just had to come to you because they're in your genes, in your generation the devil is a liar you got a god that says i have come that you might have life Tell one more person And this time a chef is about to hit the room Break those cycles you better act like you know who your God is.

25:11 And I might not be able to stop it all, but I'm going to use my voice, and you got to use your voice, and we got to be courageous together because some sisters need us, some brothers need us, some children need us, and brothers, we got to man up and find healthier ways to deal with our anger. Sisters, you got to warm it up. and find healthier ways to deal with your anger because you're a cycle breaker.

25:46 You're a cycle breaker. It don't have to be like this. And it ain't going to be like this. And I'm going to keep talking about it until you're so uncomfortable until you don't make it like this. One of the things psychologists teach, y'all be seated. I'm just teaching. One of the things psychologists teach is wrong with us is that silence keeps stuff going on and on and on. So for my note takers who want to take some notes, break the silence. Save a life. Break the silence. Save a life. Break the silence. Save a life. Break the silence You got to create an atmosphere Where people know they can trust you with it But if you don't talk about And then watch this Under the ugly underbelly Of domestic violence Is people who feel the need to stay Because of religious beliefs And last year, I almost got, I went viral again because I used my voice to say at this church, this black pastor is not going to encourage any woman or any man to stay in any relationship, be it dating or marriage, where any type of abuse is going on, and the person that's abusing you ain't willing to change.

27:20 So divorce it is. I'll sign your marriage certificate. Bring me your divorce certificate. I'll sign that too. Now let me go viral again. The devil is a whole lie and slew foot too. No, you're not going to walk around and live your whole life miserable because you think you're going to please God. God is not pleased with you staying in something that's killing you. Some can swim. Some on boards. But others gonna make it on broken pieces. I couldn't get to everybody. Because some folks are still gonna pass. Some are gonna fight fights with breast cancer.

28:15 Even when they do everything right. still gonna pass. Some man, some woman today, somewhere, is gonna lose their life to a case of domestic violence. I can't grab them all. I can't save them all. I know this sermon. Some of you are like, what's the point? Because all I can do is take my little pebble and drop it in the lake and create some ripples and trust that God will transform that ripple into a wave. But if I get my rock and you get your rock and you get your rock and you get your rock and you get your rock and you get your rock and we all throw. that's how change happens it never happens with the majority it happens with a few faithful minorities who made up their mind you ain't gonna take my voice i'm gonna talk about this i'm gonna save a life even if it costs me something because some Thank you.

29:23 can swim. Some are going to make it on boards. And some are going to make it to the shore on broken pieces. There's a sister at our church this week. When I tell you it's been a heavy season. I mean when I tell you it's been a heavy season. So I took a few days just to relax, recover, recharge. Because I said God I got a lot more to do this year now I need a few days. So me and Bree went and chilled. I feel my help now while I was chilling you know Pastor said this at my installation didn't he? He said y'all think we work a 9 to 5 we work a 24 7 so I was chilling and that's fine because this is ministry it happens somebody text me she's one of my sweetest members who I love and she's probably watching now she text me and she said pastor I have some hard decisions to make and I need your help.

30:31 So because of where she is in her life right now we can't talk we had to text. And so her health has her in this position. So I said is this the best way to communicate? I want to do whatever I can do to help you. She said texting is fine. She said they gave me the option of ventilator or hospice. And then the third option is see this is real life. So you think you got something to complain about. And then you hear what others are going through and you say now you know what Lord that little knucklehead co-worker at the job is not gonna take my joy another week this lady has an option of ventilator hospice care or just let nature take its course so I'm texting because she said fear is underneath all of this I said well what are you fearing about the ventilator she said I'm fearing if I get on it I'll never get off I said well what are you fearing about hospice she said my daddy died in a hospice and that just seems like a dead end to me so we worked through fear of hospice fear of ventilators so i had i was just digging doing pastoral care what are you fearing what and i said if i could be honest with you it sounds like your fear is deeper than ventilators and hospice care it sounds like you're afraid of death she said I am afraid of death so then I had to do some more digging I said why are you afraid of death she said I'm not ready yet she said I have a book I want to finish and I don't want to leave my family they are going to be devastated I said well what are the things I said now listen now listen, now listen, now we're in a place where we can talk on an even playing field.

32:17 I said, we all have to die. We just don't know when that time will be. I said, so here's my last question for you. I want you to think about it. What can you do with whatever time you have left that would make you feel like when death comes, you're ready for it? She said, I got to finish my book. I have some more stuff I want to write. And she named a couple other things. I said, well, let's spend the rest of our days doing the stuff that will give us satisfaction and wholeness and joy. That if death comes, at least I die empty. At least I die in a way where I have done some things that are significant enough that my legacy will live on. after I close my eyes because some can swim some are gonna make it on on boards some are gonna make it on broken pieces but some of us aren't gonna make it to the earthly shore we got a heavenly shore we're headed to and I came to let somebody know in the middle of a breast cancer fight in the middle of a cancer fight in the middle of terminal illness you better fight till you can't fight no more. Don't you let a doctor, a diagnosis, the enemy, your fear keep you from living. I got two points and I'm done. Point number one, don't lose your fight. Point number two, don't lose your faith. Grab onto a board. Grab onto a broken piece and make it to the shore by any means necessary.

34:02 I need someone