Rip Up Your List __ (Part 1) Relationship Goals Reloaded

0:50 No matter where you are, there is a brighter future for you. Maybe you just need to learn some things. So go get the book today at IamMikeTodd.com and enjoy this message as we all win in relationships. Well, good morning, Transformation Church. If you are here today, you are alive, you are breathing. This is the day the Lord has made, and we will rejoice and be glad in it, y'all. I am so hyped. Wherever you are right now, I am grateful that you are a part of what God is doing here at Transformation Church. I need to see where you're watching from right now. my phone up right now. I need y'all to tell me where you're watching from because I'm reloaded and I am ready for what God is going to do today. Come on, I see some people right now. This is how we connect right now in this moment. I see people watching from California. I see people watching from Florida. Come on, where are you watching from right now? I see Jessica is on here and Stephanie is on here and Chance is on here. Is that Chance the Rapper? Is that you? I don't know, but come on.

2:00 I see you. Everybody's typing in Reloaded right now. I believe God has something so specific. Canada is on here. Tanzania is on here. Maryland is on here. Boston, Nigeria, Jamaica, Pittsburgh, Philly, the Philippines, Ohio, Hawaii, D.C., Chicago. Y'all, we are here from all over the world, and that means that God is where you are at. I feel this thing right now. The church building is closed, but the church is what? Wide open. And I declare you to make your house, your car, your kitchen, a place where the presence of God can come meet you. Ah, I'm excited already, y'all. I don't even know what's about to happen today. Let me calm down. Woosah, for everybody who's visiting. Hello, my name is Michael Todd, and I am the lead pastor of Transformation Church. And today, I believe God has a word for you. But before I get into this word, I got to say thank you.

2:59 As many of you guys know that this past week, your boy released his first ever book called Relationship Goals. And y'all supported this thing so much. I mean, as I look at this, like, and I see what God has done because of your support, because of you sharing it and telling people about it and buying it for your kids and your grandkids and buying it for your whole group.

3:26 the number one book in the world this week how in the world did that happen except it's deepening the thought that God gave us a long time ago all you have finish it is all you need and I want to thank you for that for those who joined us on the release party and those who are still buying it transformation church here in Tulsa I know a lot of y'all haven't been able to get the book so your pastor's working on something where you can get the book this week I just believe this is going relationship. And at TC, we have a culture code of generosity. We give just to give and not to get. So I want to give some stuff away right now. I picked some people from Instagram, and I just want to shout to you, if you're watching right now, the first thing I want to give away is a signed copy of this book to somebody right now. If you want it, put it in the comments. I want that book, okay? And the first person that I want to give something to, I believe it's on Instagram at Bianca underscore Nolden. Bianca, this is your book. It's coming to you. Is that Bianca over there? Bianca, this book is coming to you. Okay, I want to give one more signed book away to I Am Timothy Griffin. Timothy Griffin, if you're watching, Pastor Mike has a book with your, well, my name on it, and it's signed to you. Okay, and then I want to take it up. I love generosity. We had some shoes custom made. Y'all know pastor like shoes. And we had some shoes custom made for our five-year anniversary. They were some custom blazers. Put it on the screen so the people can see what we're talking about. I want to give these shoes to somebody right now.

5:06 And I picked somebody right now. Somebody's praying hard. I feel you. I see your spirit right now. Somebody is praying hard. These custom blazers right here. I want to give those to Underscore DeAndre Sanders. DeAndre Sanders, where you at, bro? These are coming to you, okay? And then I had some relationship goals custom Nikes made. Now, somebody's sitting here. That is not religious. Shouldn't he be opening the scriptures right now? Excuse me while somebody gets blessed. Keep yourself yourself over there for a second. Let somebody else get blessed. You got one of them? Throw one of them to me, okay? I got some custom-made relationship goals Nikes that I want to give to somebody. These aren't for sale. to somebody and I want to give these to I believe it is Makeda M-A-K-E-D-A underscore Ty underscore. These are coming to you right now. I want you to have these. I want you to enjoy them. And then I want to give away one more thing. Here we go. Many of you don't know that this series went viral and people saw this example that I did with these orange golf balls. And me and Natalie thought it would be cool because we don't keep stuff like this to create moments, but we want other people to have moments where it transformed their life.

6:26 So I took the jacket from that original thing, put all the orange golf balls in it. Me and Natalie signed it and I'm sending it to somebody. Okay. Somebody get your prayer life up right now. God can change the name on the screen. The person that I want to send this to is at underscore, No, at queen underscore B underscore seven. Queen B seven. That is coming to you. Come on, rejoice with everybody who won. Some of y'all salty right now. Take the salt off, okay? Get sweet.

6:57 Today, again, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for not being a part of a moment. Thank you for being a part of a movement. God is doing something so extravagant through you. and remember this is not the church the organization you are the church the organism and today I just want to pray that God would speak to us I've been I've been listening to this song that says speak to my heart Lord give me your holy word if I can't hear from you then I'll know what to do see I won't go alone this is a little old-school but I'll never go on my own just let your spirit guide and let your word abide speak to my Lord some of y'all got it hey so give me your holy word if I can't hear from you mmm then I know what to do I won't go alone. I'm in an arena by myself right now. So I'll never go on my own. I feel it.

8:09 Just let your spirit guide. Hey, and just let your word abide. One more time. Speak to my heart, Lord. I need y'all to be my choir right now. Give me your holy word. If I can hear from you, Hey, then I'll know what to do. Say, I won't go on. God, I'll never go on my own. Just let your spirit guide and let your word abide. Speak to my heart. Father, I thank you that you would speak to everybody's hearts. Come on, hands lifted all over this building, all over your house. God, speak to our hearts in the name of Jesus. knows how to get to our hearts like you do. And today, God, I'm asking that you would penetrate areas that have been locked up because of hurt, because of pain, because of frustration, because, Father God, maybe we didn't have instruction. Father, I'm thanking you that you will speak directly to people's hearts. Habits don't change if hearts don't change.

9:18 And God, we need you to change our heart. We've been dealing with the symptoms and the fruit, root today. So as we start relationship goals reloaded, I thank you that you would speak to our hearts, God. Don't let us just feel good, God. Let us transform. Do a work on the inside of us, and we'll be careful to give you all the glory, all the honor, and all the praise. In Jesus' name, I dare you to clap your hands in your house, in your kitchen. Oh, magnify the Lord with me. Let us exalt His name together. Hallelujah. Woo! I'm ready. All right. Are y'all ready? Put ready in the comments if y'all ready, because I'm telling you I'm reloaded. I don't know. Every time I say reloaded, I feel like I have to do that sound, like I'm reloaded. All right? And I want you to get out notes, because we are starting week two of a series we're calling Help Me, Relationship Goals Reloaded.

10:17 You forgot the sound effects. I'm going to give you one more chance. Today, we're starting week two of a series we're calling Relationship Goals Reloaded. Help me. All right, there we go. I felt you. I felt you do it on that one. And I thought last week, we learned about the principles of God being the guide for all of our relationships. We learn that if we're going to do what God has called us to do and have the relationship God's called us to have, we need to set the Word of God, the manual, the maker's mind as the principal thing in all of our relationships. And the thing that I'm burdened with is that so many people want relationship goals, but they have no aim. And until we get aim, we can never reach the goals that God has intended for us.

11:13 So this entire series, I don't care how you got here, if somebody sent you the link, or your boyfriend was like, we can't date no more unless we listen to Relationship Goes Reloaded Together. Like whatever reason you're here right now, I want you to know it's on purpose. Because God wants to divinely aim you in the direction of the things that are real relationship goals. And last week I didn't have no filter on. And I saw y'all on Twitter, we were Twittering, we were trending on Twitter. I'm all good with that, but are you transforming in real life? Like, I got to make sure that we're not just trending and we're not transforming because we can trend and type all the quotes, but if we don't get it in our heart and start applying some of these things and walking in knowledge, remember what we talked about last week that knowledge means light, okay? And darkness means ignorance. And a lot of things in our life, we are walking in darkness in, especially when it comes to relationships. And nobody showed us, we don't have a playbook. We're watching celebrities and culture, and they're defining what relationships are, and they keep not working because it's done in darkness. But when we get light, when we get knowledge, and y'all remember Jesus is the light of the world. When we get his perspective or his principles or his mind on relationships, we start walking in light. It's harder to see when you're in the dark, but it's easy to look over and step over what may trip you up when you have light. And what we want for all of your relationship is the light to come on, for you to be able to see that, I'm about to call people's name, for you to be able to see that he or she may be something you're tripping over. That the goal of success that you think that you're supposed to have may be something you're tripping over and you might be tripping just because you're in the dark. But through this series, by faith, we're going to shine. Everybody shout at me light. Come on, put some light bulbs in the comments. That's what we want. We want light

13:19 to come on. We want you to win in relationship because lights are coming on. This thing keeps going to sleep. I can't stop the word today. And so this is what I'm encouraging everybody in this moment right now, is that if you are in a place of relational darkness, because I don't know who you are and what's going on, but if you're in a place of relational darkness right now, I feel like God told me that He wants to change every relationship in your life, because you chose the relationships in the dark. Listen to me. If you feel like you're in relational darkness right now, God told me to tell you that every relationship around you is about to change. Even the ones you call your besties and your buddy and all of those different things like that, it's about to change because you picked those relationships in the dark. And there's some people that are right now as you would be like, oh, that's good. I am married to you. I'm about to get rid of you. Nope, you're stuck. So everybody that's married right now, you don't get to choose another partner right now. You're going to change enough to be able to look at the situation differently, and you're going to become what you want out of them. Oh, I just said a whole bunch.

14:34 And God said that the light is coming on. I feel that, Charles. The light is coming on. And I begin to think about this concept of being transformed by the light of God's knowledge and making his principles the thing that are first in our life when it comes to relationships. And then I had this weird situation happen this week. You know, me and Pastor Natalie have been doing all these interviews and talking to people and being on national TV and all this other stuff like that, talking about relationship goals. And somebody asked her a question that kind of threw me for a loop, which is the infancy of the message today that I think is going to change your life. They asked Pastor Natalie, oh my goodness, you guys have been married 10 years and this, that, and the third. Was Pastor Michael everything on your list?

15:24 Was he everything on your list? And I felt a hesitation in my wife's voice. I felt a little clearing of the throat. And I stepped back and I said, let me see what she about to say right here. Yes, Natalie, was I everything on your list? And you know me and Natalie, we leave a hot relationship, humble, open, and transparent. And she said, no, he actually wasn't anything on my list. I said this heifer done gone on national TV and told them that I wasn't her relationship goal she said I thought my list had somebody who was tall and muscular and and more Hispanic Puerto Rican green I say you wanted to be married to what's the name Derek Jeter or a rod huh this what you got baby and And I begin to think about it that the list she had was made up out of her imagination. And all of us have some type of list, a list for our relationship, the list for our business, the list for what time we should get married and when we should be able to build the house and when we're going to have kids.

16:37 We have these lists. And what God told me is that I am not a God of your list. He told me, he said, Michael, many of my children are disappointed in relationships because they have made their list and they're asking me to be Santa Claus, to be the tooth fairy. Would you please, since I've been nice and I'm naughty, will you please give me my list? Uh-oh, I'm in somebody's house right now. And God says I am NOT the God of the list And and and and so he gave me this title and I need everybody to buckle up right now Because I'm gonna say something very strong And very direct but I think it's going to change your life the title of today's sermon is rip up your list Every list you've made without God every list that came out of your imagination but had no faith attached to it.

17:38 I'm telling you, today you have to decide to rip up your list. Oh, I feel this thing right now. See, we need a revelation of relationships, but the thing that's working against God being preeminent or the first in our lives is that we've already made a life without him. We've already wrote down in our journal what we want and when we want it and how we want it, to work against what God has for us because he's thinking of the purpose he put us here for and we're thinking of the pleasure we want to experience and God says your list and my list will never match

18:16 I Know some people are frustrated don't log off right now because what you need to understand is the list you've made and somebody's like Well, I've never made a list. Yeah. Yeah, there's a list in your mind Even if you haven't written them down That you've said I'll only work with people like this You've put stipulations and circumstances. I'll only get married when this happens. We've made inner vows We've told ourselves this is what we're going to do. This is how we're going to do it This is the age we're gonna do it by and it is one of the greatest sources of frustration for people Is because God does not line up with what he didn't line out? He didn't line out that course for your life But you're frustrated now because your plan didn't line up with what's actually happening and And today through the Word of God, I'm going to encourage you to rip up your list.

19:13 Let me give you the definition that I made up of the list. See the list is the thing that, oh I want him to be 6'6", I want him to have a job that pays him good, I want him to be able to take care of me, cook salmon and be able to have at least a six pack. That was your list. And you sitting there with Elmer Fudd. No, I'm just playing.

19:37 reality um well I want her to be able to laugh at all my jokes and she likes sports but also loves makeup and she does this and does that and we make all of these lists and God told me today he said I would like to revise every list that has ever been made without me I would I would like to call a redo to the situation and to your life in relationship look at the definition of the list it's a set pre a set of predetermined self-fabricated ideals of a specific person situation or outcome that was written down continually thought about or verbally communicated by which erroneous expectations become goals for Let me break it down. It's the stuff that we said was gonna happen with no grounding just because we felt it I saw something on TV and be like yo I'm gonna build my dream house by the time I'm 24 and you start saying that over and over and over and over and over again to where it becomes an erroneous expectation in your life and When it doesn't happen by the time you're 24 then you're looking at God like I thought you said you was with me I thought you said if you before me then who can be against me? He said I didn't plan that You you made up and put that on your list And I was nowhere in that and that's where I'm coming to challenge you because some of you are Discontent in the season you're in right now not because God stopped doing what he said he was gonna do It's because you thought you would be somewhere else that God never promised you would be

21:27 They don't want this they don't want this today y'all but I'm gonna give it to you anyway because I'm reloaded and Somebody is supposed to win in relationships But if God's purpose for your life is gonna be preeminent you have to take away everything you built without him Rip up the list somebody put it in the comments rip up your list. Come on Let me give you a reason why you should rip up your list you rip up your list because your list for you Will never look like God's list for you

21:56 Your list of factors of what you want, like, like, like, let me break it down. When you make a list of how you want your relationships to be, your life to be, your family to be, your list factors in what you want. When God makes a list of how he wants your life to be, how he wants your family to be, How he has designed your relationships to be he factors in what you need And many of us never pick what we need we pick what we want See Natalie wanted some Puerto Rican green-eyed something But what she got was a fine tall of milk chocolate you hear me not because it's what she wanted I was what she needed the job that you're working out right now It may not be what you wanted but your character needs to be developed some more so God gave you what you need Some of y'all are are mad because you were born into the family that you were born into But what I'm telling you is that may have not been the family you wanted But something that was birthed in the pain that you went through Was what you needed for the purpose that God has called you to I'm just getting started See when we make up fabricated standards based on our feelings no prayer No prophetic insight no word from God just feelings. Yeah before I get turned 40. I'm gonna be retired Where did that come from?

23:26 Where did you make that up at oh no no no? I'm gonna run my own business next year and that was five years ago and you're frustrated in this moment because you have personally fabricated up things and never went to God for it the reason why I'm bringing this in the second week of relationship goals is because I think that this is one of the main reasons why relationships do not work out and why they break down it's because of fabricated expectations of somebody else

23:55 you put it on your list that they will be athletic you put it on their list that they would be emotional you put it on your list that they will be able to understand your childhood scars and that y'all would like the same thing and all these things you put on your list were made by you and not co-signed by God and so God says when I present to you what you actually need you mad you big mad because my way for you the Bible says is not the way you would choose but that's where trust comes in and that's why I believe some Some people have to rip up their list and I see people right now, you're frustrated with where you are in life. I know you're frustrated with the relationships that you have. You're frustrated with the way that business is going. But I'm going to teach you something that changed my life. It's the formula of frustration. Can I tell it to you right now?

24:47 Write this down. You don't want to miss this. This will change your children's children. The formula of frustration is fabricated expectations plus failed reality equals feelings of frustration. You make up stuff you don't even tell nobody. Like you make up, like my 30th birthday is gonna be the turn up of the century, I promise you, we turning up. And you make this fabricated expectation. And then the reality is your birthday was in the middle of a pandemic. But let's be real, because that's the reality people are living right now. My birthday gonna be the turn up, I'm telling everybody I'm turning up. Oh, oh, oh, okay. And the reality is my birthday is in the middle of a pandemic and now you have feelings of frustration not because You didn't have people around you who appreciated you and they did things for you and they sent you cards and they sent you text messages And if you didn't have this fabricated Expectation you could have appreciated what was actually there But instead because you made something up that was not supposed to be there now You're feeling frustrated and downtrodden in this thing. It's time for you to rip up the list And I don't care what area of your life it is.

26:01 It can be in relationships. This message is coming for everybody. It can be in your marriage. It can be in your business. It can be in any area. It's time to go back to what God is saying. Because too many people are feeling frustrated, but I need to let you know something about God. And this may be the thing you don't like, but it's the thing you need to hear right now. The reason you have to rip up your lips, take this down, is because God is more committed to your destiny than he is to your desires he's more committed to the destiny he sent you here for than your own desires and this is where people be like i didn't like that christianity thing anyway i got to get out of here but i wish somebody would have told me this because i spent many years of my christian life quoting scriptures wrong because i know somebody's like i'm looking it up right now I know the Bible says that God will give you the desires of your heart I know that's in there somewhere oh baby you heard somebody say that and you didn't actually read the scripture let me take you to the scripture and give you revelation that the Bible does say something like that but let me give you the context Psalms 37 verse 4 it says delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart let me give you the passage remix okay when you choose to put yourself in the Lord when you choose to put your plans in the Lord when you choose to put your relationships in the Lord when you choose to put your business plans in the Lord then it says he will give your heart what it should desire not he's gonna give you everything that's already in your heart that's ugly and it's not like him he gonna give you your heart's desire he said when you get surrounded by my will my idea for you when you get an accountability and you know because what's in our heart is bad the Bible tells us that the heart is more deceitful than anything the stuff I naturally want without God is selfish it's self-serving it's prideful and God says that's why you got to come out of

28:08 yourself and you got to get in me and when you delight yourself in the Lord he says I'll change the things in your heart and you'll start wanting the things I want for you. You'll go from wanting money and you'll want to be effective. You'll want to go from wanting to be impressive to impactful. See, he'll start to, how do you know, Pastor Mike, this is my life. When I was a younger man and I thought I was going to be Diddy or Kanye or somebody like that I wanted it for what it made me feel like if you would have told me that a million people would be following me on anything I that would have gone straight to my head that would have gone straight to blow up this thing that I was doing and so God said let me take you the humble route let me let me get you in me let me let me transition you from the music industry and all this other stuff and let me let you start off serving a bunch of youth who don't even

29:12 Let me let me help you work with them through their 14 and 13 year old problems And you got to sit there for an hour and a half and really care about it and take it home and pray for them And then pray for their parents. Why don't you get in me? And when you get in me, I'll start to change your desires. I went from saying I'd never be on a platform To saying God I never ever want to be without a platform to be able to give your name glory What was that? He was changing my heart's desires and giving me what to desire I don't know who I'm talking to right now, but some of your stuff You've been desiring things that was not in the Lord and God saying rip up that list Tear that thing up because I'm telling you when you get my desires for you You will live the life that you're really searching for the reason why it's not working and you still feel unfulfilled is because it was never meant to fill you up unless it came from the source let me stop and that's why Proverbs 19 21 says read this one it says many of the plans in a person's heart I mean all of us got plans all of us let me say it another way all of us got lists all of us got things we put in our calendar and by this time I would have this and I'd be having this many kids by now and me and my family would be doing this we all got plans but look what it says but it's the Lord's purpose that prevails I came to a place where I ripped up my list of being this world-renowned music producer and having millions of dollars by the time I was 25 and doing I ripped up all of those lists because I was fighting a losing battle he said you can go ahead and keep doing and all of that, but at the end of the day, my purpose will prevail.

31:08 That's why you see all these rappers and artists at the end of their life, they all become Christians. Like, no, come on, let's be honest. Like everybody's VH1 behind the scenes is like, I've been running for God for 39 years and today I'm a pastor of First Ebenezer Gangster Church and I just, why is that? Because at the end of the day, you can do all of this and it takes from you,

31:33 prevail. Somebody needs to hear that right now. Keep going and chasing all the kitty cat out there. Keep going and trying to get everybody to like you. But God says at some point you're going to get tired. And at some point it won't work for you no more. And at some point my purpose will prevail. Somebody needs to hear me. Why are you talking that wrong Pastor Mike? Because I'm hoping to shake you out of those cycles you've been in. It's time for you to whip the list. I need somebody to If this is your list it's time to rip the list. I need somebody to hear me in the pot I don't care if it's in your relationship. I don't care. It's if it's in your family God is saying I Need you to trust me because I'm God and at the end of the day my purpose will prevail

32:21 And that's why we rip up our list write this down you need to rip up your list because a God dream is never created based on your preference a God dream is created based on your purpose. So when God sits down to make you, he doesn't say, let me see what they want. Let me throw in some. He says, what have I purposed them for? Okay so if I purpose them to bring my name glory in this area, what is the path that I'm going to take them on? And how am I going to get them there? And what relationships do I need? And this is the thing God built within all of us the greatest thing he gave us was choice And that's why when we get a plan from God We still have the choice to be able to obey the plan of God or to go our own way And that's why I'm trying to encourage you right now because I wish somebody would have got up in front of me And when I was a little younger and said Mike rip up the list You don't want what's on that list You want what God wants for you because in what God wants for you is true fulfillment and what God wants for you You don't have to strive for it. You can stride Into it in what God has for you There's actual satisfaction and a God dream is never created based on your preference a God dream is created based on your purpose And if you want to talk about dreams, there's no way we can talk about dreams without talking about Joseph Let's look at Genesis chapter 37 Because y'all remember Joseph with the coat of many colors?

33:51 Some of us have missed this story because he had a dream or he probably had a list of how he thought his life was going to go because God gave him this very vivid dream. Look at it. It said, Jacob loved Joseph more than any of his other children because Joseph had been born to him in his old age. So one day, Jacob had a special gift made for Joseph. It was a Versace jacket, a beautiful robe. but his brothers hated Joseph because their father loved him more than the rest of them they couldn't say a kind word to him one note night Joseph had a dream the same way all of us have dreams one night Joseph had a dream and when he told his brothers he said we were out in the field tying up bundles of grain and suddenly a bundle stood up and I don't know what this really meant but it was bundles all gathered around and bowed low. Y'all dropped it low to my bundle. And his brother said, fool, so you think you're going to be our king? This boy done lost his mind. You think we're going to bow to you? Do you actually think you will reign over us? And they hated him all the more because of the dream and the way he talked about him, talked about them. See, when I think about Joseph having a dream he had a dream that he was going to be a king or he was going to be in the palace and so I want to show you this this is like many of our lives Joseph's list probably looks something like this it's it's gonna be a dream that I have and then I'm gonna get some pork from my family and my brothers and the people that are around me and then I mean opportunities are gonna open up and and this is how my list is gonna go and then promotion is And then I'm going to end up in the palace.

35:45 But if you read through the next four chapters of Genesis, what happens to Joseph is what happens to many of our lives. It's that we have a list and a preferred way that we would want it to go and we made up for it to go. But then we have our list and then we have real life. And Joseph's real life was he had a dream, but then he was betrayed by his brothers. He was sold into slavery. thrown into prison and then he still got the palace?

36:18 Hold on, hold on, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I thought my dream was gonna be something that everything in the dream was gonna be easy and linear and promotion and up, up, up, up, up and then I would reach the palace. But Joseph's real life didn't look like his real list. And some of y'all are in here and you're mad because your real life doesn't look like real list but I came to encourage you today you can rip up the list because if God is with you and you are going through something right now you still can reach your palace let me say it a different way because because I need to talk to some people who feel like their dream has dropped see see um the reason we got to rip up our list is because Joseph started out with the dream and And again, then he went and he thought he was going to go to the palace.

37:14 So I want you to picture like these two extremes, these highs, okay? And when we get these highs in our life and we think there's this thing that's about to happen and everything's going to go from glory to glory, but then the dream drops. And Joseph literally goes from the dream to literally being thrown into a pit. His brothers sold him into slavery and threw him into a pit. And in the middle between the dream and the palace, he experienced betrayal, slavery, and prison.

37:52 Pastor Mike, why are you talking about ripping up a list and being in the pit? Because this is where a lot of y'all relationships are and have been. And I came to encourage you today that just because your relationship is in the pit does not mean that it's over. divorced two times and now you're trying to start on another list without God baby rip up your list because God has a plan for you that is bigger than this what you need to know is the path to the palace many times passes through the pit

38:23 hmm I'm preaching up here right now so so you started off with the dream and you started off with your list and you started off with the relationship that was supposed to last that's what happened to me and pastor Natalie high And I went through 10 months of insanity and perversion and cheating and lying. And it took us being with God that still delivered us to a place of a palace where we were able to help other marriages, but we did not get there going some smooth route. The bottom dropped out of that thing. And when we had nothing else, we had to trust in God. We had to rip up our list. And there's people watching. I feel the presence of God right now that have been through divorces that has been through infidelity that have been Heartbroken that have been hurt whose kids have walked away and business partners took advantage And you are feeling stuck right now Because you went through the betrayal and you went through the thing that seemed like slavery and you went through the thing that fell Feels like prison, but God says if you rip up your list I can use all of that to still deliver you to the palace to the place where your purpose is fulfilled And I think that some people need to hear this in the room right now That's why Psalms 23 4 David writes yay though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death see that pit put it back on the screen The pit is a valley I was going good and then it dropped off But God says even when you're in the valley I'm walking with you.

39:57 Even when you're at the low place, I'm with you. You don't have to fear because I am with you. The truth is Joseph wouldn't have picked betrayal. He had to rip up his list because what God was going to allow him to go through would not have been something he picked on his list.

40:21 None of us would pick betrayal. None of us would pick COVID-19. Did anybody write that down on your year plan this year? Did anybody put that on your dream board? I want to start Janu off really strong, and then I want to get in the Word in February, and then I want to meet my man in March, and then I don't want to see him again until next August.

40:45 Nobody picked it, but God's using it. He's using it to develop you. He's using it to expose what you really trust. He's using it. Come on, y'all. Somebody needs to put in the comments, he's using it, he's using it, he's using it. He wouldn't have, they wouldn't have picked, they wouldn't have put that on their list. Me and Natalie wouldn't have put autism for our son on our list. There's no way I would have wrote down what I want for my son is.

41:16 So what happens when you get a dream and God gives you the son or gives you something and then the bottom drops out? I Didn't put it on my list I Did I didn't I didn't want this but I got it And what happens when it doesn't look like what I thought? And many of you I feel this so strong you are so mad at God and he can't even speak to your heart anymore Because you are so frustrated over a list you made that did not come to reality it was fabricated It was ideal it was a fantasy and when it didn't happen It devastated you so much that now you can't hear when God's trying to heal your heart and he's trying to bring people into your life to help you And you're so jaded and so broken and so anti and God's saying today I'm begging you I sent this big black man sweaty and all black with his wife on his shirt to beg you to rip up Your list right now I want you to take everything that you put as a erroneous expectation and say God I'm ripping it up This is no longer what I will hold myself or anybody else to.

42:27 Can we rewrite what the purpose looks like in my life? Can we rewrite what success is in my family? Can we real, come on y'all, can we rewrite? Because I'm tired of being frustrated and I feel like I'm in the pit and I've been comparing myself to everybody else's Instagram feed and they're getting married and they're having a baby and they're moving into their dream home and today I have been frustrated and discontent because I made a list. But by the power of the Holy Spirit it's not going to be easy but today I'm ripping up the list. Whoo! I feel this thing right now. Somebody say rip it up! Somebody needs to rip up the list. Joseph now gets sold into slavery in Genesis 37 verse 23 and literally it says so when When Joseph arrived, his brothers ripped.

43:22 That's crazy. His brothers ripped off the beautiful robe. This was a metaphoric sign of what was happening to any list that he thought. That Bible will preach itself. You hear what I'm saying to you? They literally ripped off the path that he thought he was going to be, the thing that represented his favor. It said, his brothers ripped off the beautiful robe he was wearing. Then they grabbed him and threw him into the pit. Put it back up there. I like that up there, because somebody's seeing it right now. They ripped it off and they threw him in the pit. So when the Ishmaelites, who were Midianite traders, came by, Joseph's brothers, verse 28, go to verse 28. It said, they pulled them out of the cistern. Now this messes me up every time.

44:14 I don't have enough time to do this, but he gets thrown in by people and then a few hours later those same people come and they act like they're helping him out. What does it feel like to have the people who betrayed you, betray you, come back and act like it's all good, but the only reason they were pulling him up out of the cistern was to sell him out again.

44:40 They threw him in, they pulled him up, and look what it says, and they sold him for 20 pieces of silver, and the traders took him to Egypt. Look at verse 36, drop down. Meanwhile, the Midianite traders arrived in Egypt, where they sold Joseph to Potiphar. So he was sold again. An officer for Pharaoh, the king of Egypt, Potiphar was a captain of the palace guard. Now, for most of us, this would be it. Our attitude would be so bad at this point. Where is God? He ain't real. He gave me a dream, and now I've been betrayed by the people who are closest to me. And y'all know that's where betrayal really happens. It's the people that are closest to you, the people who know who you really are, but they use that against you. Like, it's that. That's where the relationship holes are. See, we're talking about relationship goals, but a lot of us are dealing with relationship wrong relationships because we're expecting people that don't know us to fulfill things that happen to us from people who were supposed to love us and the truth is the only person that can fix it is not the offender or the person coming in it's the God who created you

45:51 And so, and so he comes into this point like, what in the heck? I was just coming to help my brothers out. I got sold out and then sold into slavery. I got moved from what was comfortable into a foreign land. How is God using this? And that's where somebody is right now. But the reason why you want to take your little list of everything that you thought was supposed to happen and you want to just start slowly ripping it up is because every betrayal it's not bad some betrayals are a blessing you missed it see if the betrayal wouldn't have happened Joseph wouldn't ended up in Egypt let me give it to you in a point rip up your list because the betrayal wasn't meant to break you the betrayal was allowed to take you it was allowed to take you to your next destination that you would have not gone to had it not been some hurt involved some of us are so comfortable I'm talking to people right now that God has to allow hurt to move you from your home some of y'all are so good with being in a mediocre relationship that God has to allow their colors to come out, for you to be put on blast enough to move out of that situation.

47:18 God uses the pain of betrayal many times not as a thing that is supposed to break you, it's a thing that's supposed to take you. Take you to the place you wouldn't go on your own. What would have made Joseph leave his dad, his favor, and go to Egypt? Nothing, because he was in a comfortable spot where he was favored. But God said your purpose, the purpose I have for you is so much bigger than being comfortable in this little space. I want to make you comfortable in a big space. Do you want it even if betrayal is a part of the plan?

47:57 See, that's the thing. We don't want that on our list. We don't want people walking out on us. We don't want to be furloughed from our job. Do y'all know? I'm going to just go ahead and say it, Cordell, because I'm hearing, they listening. Some of y'all, corona was the thing God had to allow to get you out of that job. No, I know you don't. I know. For some of y'all this pandemic was allowed and they furloughed you to see your kids again No, no, no, I know you've been providing for them, but you haven't seen them You don't know the stages of life they're in and what they're struggling with And now that you're in their house and you see that their face is always down in the phone And you ask what are you looking at? This is the first time you've seen your kids in 10 years

48:47 See what God's trying to do is he's thinking about everything with your purpose in mind Not your preference in mind And Joseph had to go through betrayal because many times the worst revel the worst relational devastation is many times God's vehicle of transportation and This is what I'm encouraging you to do because I've had a lot of failures I know it looks like pastor might be winning all the time on Instagram But but your boys had a lot of failures in my life over the past decade and what I have learned to do I'm about to give you a key to ripping up your list Always look for God's favor in the failure. Look for God's favor. I know it hurts. I know you never thought this would happen. I know this was not a part of the plan. This wasn't a part of the dream. This wasn't on my list. But God says, I leave hints of my favor in every failure.

49:42 Look what he did. He left hints of his favor for Joseph in the failure. He's now sold to slavery in Potiphar's house. His brothers have sold him out. He ends up in Egypt. And look what happens in Genesis chapter 39, verse 2. It says, and the Lord was with Joseph. What? Hold on. I just got betrayed and put into slavery. And the first thing that the Bible records is God was with him. In the midst of the failure, God is with you. In the midst of the pain God is with you and see many of us would rather to be in a good situation without God But me I'll take a bad situation with God any day of the week because my Bible says if God be for me Then who could be against me?

50:35 And that's where some of you need to know that your advantage in the middle of a bad situation The reason why you have to rip up your list even though the last relationship didn't work is because God is still with you And when you realize that, watch this. It says, so he succeeded. The Lord was with Joseph, so he succeeded. The Lord was with Joseph, so he succeeded. Put your name in there. The Lord was with Michael, so he succeeded. Do it one more time. The Lord was with, say your name, so he succeeded. And everything he did as he, watch what he did, served. Hmm. You mean I have to serve in a sucky situation? You mean I still have to to actually do and be what God requires me to do and be even when it's not fair Joseph was in an unfair situation Mish and God still required him to do What was put in him to do and some of y'all are in an unfair situation Stuff that you didn't write on your list But God said rip the list up because if you would ever get your eyes on me and you would serve even in the sucky situation it would change the trajectory of everything that's going on look at it it says in everything he did he was successful because he served in the home of the Egyptian master Potiphar noticed that he noticed this and realized that the Lord was with Joseph there are people that are watching you in your pit and they're gonna realize that God is with you even though it's a bad situation he said this please Potiphar so he soon made Joseph listen his personal attendant he got an upgrade in the midst of a pit he put him in charge of the entire household and everything he owned from the day Joseph was put in charge of the master's household and property the Lord begin to bless Potiphar's house watch this for Joseph's sake there are situations that are about to be blessed because you decided in the middle of the pit when your list got ripped up that you would still serve you would still love you would still forgive you would still show up you would still encourage

52:44 in the midst of it and God says I'll promote you in the pit oh he said all his household affairs ran smoothly and his crops and livestock flourish so Potiphar gave Joseph complete administrative responsibility this don't sound like a slave to me this sound like a boss people are gonna label you slave And you're gonna walk around with the authority of a boss people are gonna say that you're not enough And you're gonna have the pin that strokes checks people People are gonna say that you're too young and God's gonna say I put my hand on you So whatever picture in I feel this right now. That's why you got to rip up your list This is why you can't be stuck to what you thought it was gonna be you have to sell out to what God is saying it is It says Potiphar gave Joseph complete administrative responsibility over everything he owned. With Joseph there, he didn't worry about a thing except was he going to eat Chick-fil-A or Popeye's.

53:48 The reason you got to rip up your list is because faithfully serving the season always produces success. I'll say it again. faithfully serving the season even if it doesn't look like what was on your list well I thought I would have kids by now but you're still single stop wishing you were somewhere else and faithfully serve this season rip up your list well I thought I would have a business and I would be running stuff and you're still mopping floors for somebody and it does not feel like God is with you what I'm telling you is forget where you thought you would be and faithfully serve this season rip up your list I this is a prophetic sign right now somebody need to get some paper in your house right now and you need to write your list you can be specific but what needs to happen for you is you need to faithfully serve the season you're in if you're in the season of singleness faithfully serve that if you're the in the season of infertility faithfully serve right there if you're in the season I know it's hard and your marriage is not working

54:55 Because God says if you rip your list and stop comparing what is to what you wish it would be, He said I can bring success to you in that very season. I am preaching up here. See, that's why you have to know that the relationship goal is not a person, it's God. That has to be the first relationship goal that you have. Joseph goes into this thing and he serves his season. I'm going to have to do a part two to this.

55:25 two in the comments because I feel this thing is so strong we're gonna do a part two but I got to give you a couple more y'all okay if y'all okay give me okay pastor okay I'm seeing it right now in the comments Joseph begins to serve his season and that's so strong for somebody right now because even college graduates

55:47 you're trying to figure out what you're about to do and God says serve this season. There's people right now that they lost a loved one and now all their focus is going to grieving and hurting. There's a time and a season for that, but the enemy would love to keep you in a trap of that because that wasn't on your list. I never thought I would lose my father. I never thought I would lose granny. I never thought I would lose big, big mama. I never thought that this was going to happen and it happened. And now I'm in a pit that wasn't on

56:20 but God is encouraging you I factored in everything that would look like a failure I saw it when I called you that's why I gave you the dream in the first place you know some nights I bet when when he was in slavery the only thing he could think about was the dream he had that God gave him a dream that you've seen yourself in a place that's not looking like relationally what you're in right now and God's saying I know you're frustrated because you set erroneous expectations that I wasn't in and your list has been interrupted but remember I'm not committed to your desires I'm committed to your destiny

57:07 and that's what God wants somebody to hear right now Joseph goes through many more things. I'll tell you about one more today. Joseph doing his thing, serving his season, and then out of the blue. I mean, if I was Joseph like, and I thought I was going to be a slave, and I'm a boss now, I'm just trying to keep everything cool. Just trying to do my job, stay out the way. And then he catches a case with a cougar. You can read the Bible. I mean, y'all got to read the Bible. The Bible is better than Maury Povich, it's better than Netflix. He catches a case with the cougar. I'm going to prove it to you all because some of you all will be like, that is not the truth. Yes, it is. Look at it in Genesis 39 verse 6. Joseph was very handsome and well built, just like your boy. And Potiphar's wife soon began to look at him lustfully. You nasty little cougar. Come and sleep with me, son.

58:01 That would be disgusting if somebody says, sleep with me, son. That's horrible. She demanded. it. But Joseph refused to look. Now I want you to see his commitment. I want you to see this. She said, sleep with me. He said, I'm not even looking. So many people are trying to figure out what the line of sin is, what the line is. And God says, I need you to rip up that list too. I want you to be above reproach. She said, sleep with me. He's not standing there naked like are you serious are you what are you what do you mean what do you mean like many of us would be sitting up in the room like hold on I don't know this is comfortable laying in the bed next room she said sleep with me demanded and he didn't even look at it and some of the protection and the parameters you need for your relationship are gonna be extreme people are going to say some of y'all need to cut off the DM's some uh-huh some of y'all need to change cell phone numbers some of y'all need to get off of websites or a software that lets your spouse know what you're looking at.

59:09 Don't take all of that. Well then you're going to fall to the trap of the cougar. And the cougar may not be an actual woman or a person. It may be a trap that the enemy set. The enemy had set this trap for Joseph. And look what happens. Joseph didn't even look at her. And he said, my master trusts me with everything in this entire household. Girl, I'm not messing that up for you. No one here has more authority than I do. He has held back nothing from me except your nasty tail.

59:43 How could I do such a wicked thing? It would be a great sin, watch, not against the master. It would be a great sin against God. See many times we don't do things because of how it would make a person feel. And God says, how about how I feel? See, every time you're sleeping with such and such because they want it, you're thinking about how bad they would feel after. But it makes me feel horrible when I saved you out of that last relationship and I brought grace to your life. And all I'm saying is, am I considered in the situation?

1:00:23 He said, she kept on pursuing on Joseph day after day, but he refused to sleep with her and he kept out of her way as much as possible. Then she lies on him. She catches him one day and nobody's around. Watch this. She rips off his robe.

1:00:47 There's a ripping that keeps coming up. She rips off his robe, he runs out, because he thought he was going to be here forever. What happens when God redeems your situation and puts you in a better situation and then he said, but this ain't the end of the ripping? What happens when he thought he had it made and God says, now I got to use this cougar to get you to where I need you to be?

1:01:14 She lies. Oh my God, Joseph tried to rape me. And Joseph was running back like this, helpful. I know she did. Like I know he was mad. I know I just see things in movies in my mind. And when Potiphar found out, he threw Joseph in prison. Now, what happens, y'all, when I made a list for my life and every step of the way God says he's with me, but I got a dream and then I get betrayed by my brothers, I get thrown in slavery, and then I get lied on in slavery and I get put in prison. My whole list has been ripped up and that's how many of y'all feel relationally, right?

1:02:00 but look what our loving God does he takes Joseph's prison and he starts him on a trajectory for the place he was supposed to be all alone he gets this man to go from a foreign land betrayed by his brothers, taken to Egypt in a guard's house that works for the palace, gets thrown into the palace's prison because that's where he needed to be to eventually become the second most powerful person in all of Egypt. What are you saying to us, Pastor Mike? But the reason you need to rip up your list is because prisons can become platforms.

1:02:58 Joseph went from a prison to a platform because he faithfully served no matter what season he was in. He didn't get mad and be like, I lost my job and they left me for somebody else and I can't this and they didn't he didn't pout and blame God he says if I'm here if if I'm here then there must be some reason and something you're doing I think the song says even when I don't see it you're working even when I don't feel it you're working you never stop working and I came to encourage somebody who's in a relational pit or who's frustrated about the expectations and your list is not happening right for you today i ask you rip up the list because the presence of god is saying i can take you from the pit to the palace if you would trust me look at it in genesis 39 21 watch watch what it says again he's in prison look at it but the lord was with joseph He was with them in the prison.

1:04:11 And he showed him his what? Faithful love. Oh, I love God. And the Lord made Joseph a favorite with the prison warden. He had favor everywhere he went. Before long, the warden put Joseph in charge of all the other prisoners and over everything that happened in the prison. I'm telling you, when the favor of God is on your life, can't nothing stop it. Betrayal can't stop it. A bad relationship can't stop it. it prison can't stop it it said that verse 23 the warden had no more worries because joseph took care of everything the lord was with him and called everything he did to do what succeed

1:04:52 the reason i'm asking everybody to rip up your list is because god's plan for your life in the very beginning it's for you to succeed his path there will never look like your path there the people there won't look like the people you would choose there natalie did not choose me but she needed me i did not choose natalie but i needed natalie and my desires and her desires became god's desires next week i'm try to find a prophecy that we got from prophetess Pam Vanette when we were in the middle of all of our ish and we had a word from God not a list we made up but a divine inspiration from God that our marriage would be glorious and we would go through a storm but God would bring us out and all this other stuff and we held on to that word that was the only word he gave us on his list it wasn't our list it was his list and all I'm asking you to do in this place I feel the presence of God coming into your house right now, I want you to rip up your list and let God rewrite it.

1:06:02 Come on. If you got a piece of paper somewhere around you right now, I want you to get it out. And all week, I need y'all to get on social media, and I need you to put your list out there. If you want to be specific and name people, because some of y'all have been naming people, some of Jerome, Travis, Demonte, put them on there. Some of you need to put success.

1:06:24 business partnerships with such and such come on we've been building lists that god was nowhere around and we've been frustrated having a house built maybe god said i'm gonna have somebody give you a house i'm saving you for something i'm not keeping you from something i'm saving you for something but if you go off of your list you'll miss the blessings that i have for you the person you're supposed to be in relationship the way you're supposed to live the purpose that i've called you to it's gonna happen you're gonna make it to the palace next week I'm gonna talk about all the things that happen because I feel the presence of God somebody's about to get a playbook to win in relationships but if we're gonna go off the principles of God the second thing we have to do is rip up our list on the count of three if you got paper everywhere I want you to rip up your list and I believe that the presence of God is gonna come in this prophetic sign right now come on get you a list get you a piece a bill that you already paid come on we're gonna rip that up Somebody get something out of a newspaper.

1:07:21 Somebody get a magazine. And prophetically sit here in this moment. And I want you to imagine everything that you built without God. Everything that you wrote down, that you said in your heart, that you've confessed out of your mouth. And I want you to see this. And on the count of three, I want you to rip that thing up. One, we are making a decision to never live without God writing our list. Two, today we stop being frustrated over what has not happened. God wants to happen. Three, come on, rip the list. I feel the presence of God in this place. I need you to be joyful. Come on, somebody else got another piece of paper. Rip the list. I feel the presence of God. This is the time where we've ripped the list.

1:08:07 And we let God know that from now on, I'll let you rewrite it. Come on, hands lifted all over this place. People, people are about to find joy again. I know you thought the date that you were going to get married was this, but God said, I got you. You're still going to get to the promised land. You're going to have a glorious marriage. You're going to be okay. He said, but rip the list right now. Rip the list. Rip the list. I feel the presence of God. Rip the list. Father, I pray for every person, hands lifted all over the world. I pray for every person that's watching this live and watching it on rebroadcast. Your Holy Spirit is right there with us. And Father, I thank you for those who can't see anything right now because of so much hurt. I thank you by your spirit. You're revealing to them the list that they've made, the things that they have said that they want and they have to have and all this other stuff, Father God. And I thank you right now by the presence that is in this moment that you are allowing them to see and they are ripping up their list God I declare that we are coming into a place where we're gonna spend time with you and let you give us a dream Father God and I thank you that your dream no matter if it goes to a pit that you are with us in that And I thank you that we will have the faith to believe that the palace is coming The palace is coming for our marriage. The palace is coming for our purpose The palace is coming for our children.

1:09:28 The palace is coming for our relationships. We declare it. We believe it. And we more than anything trust you, God. Because you have a plan for us that is bigger than anything we've ever written down or said. God, I thank you that all we people all over the world are going to be ripping up their list and coming back to you and saying, rewrite it. Rewrite it. Tell me what I need to do. Show me what I need to say. Show me what I need to believe for.

1:09:56 that we will win in relationships because we're getting a new relationship goal. Father, give us aim. We trust you, we believe you, and we thank you. In Jesus' name, we agree. In that same attitude right now, if you're here and you've never accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior, and you thought on your list that you were your God, you thought you could do it yourself, and the truth is you have a lot of relationship holes that only God can feel.

1:10:26 I don't care who's around you who's watching with you what you're smoking or drinking I don't care who you slept with last night I don't care about what business deal you made how many zeros you have in the bank The number one relationship goal you need is a relationship with Jesus Christ And today if you thought you were going to do it any way without him I want you to rip up your list And I want you to accept Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior and transformation church is a place that tells you that all of our list have been messed up by the love of Jesus see because I was someone who was addicted to pornography I was a liar I was a manipulator I cheated I did things that I never thought I'd do and God says when you rip up your list and you give me control of your life I can take everything that looks like a mess and I can turn it into a message and today that's what God wants to do with your life some people there are Other people, your heart is beating fast.

1:11:25 This is your moment. Today is the day of salvation. And I want you to make this decision right now. There are people praying for you all over the world right now. And right now, if that's you, on the count of three, I want you to lift your hands. I don't want you to care about what anybody would say about you. And I don't want you to care about cleaning up and getting things right. God tells us if we give him our heart, he'll help us change our habits. Right now, one, this is the best decision you've ever made. God is proud of you and so are we three hands going up all over the world come on hands going up we're so proud of you listen you can put your hand down right now I'm about to pray for you because you said pastor include me in that prayer and and at transformation church we're a family nobody prays alone so I want everybody watching this to pray this out loud with me everybody say God, thank you for sending Jesus just for me. Today, I rip up my list and I ask you to be my Lord and Savior.

1:12:24 I believe you lived and you died just for me. Take over. Change me. Renew me. Transform me. I'm yours in Jesus' name. Amen. Come on, if you just prayed that prayer, all of heaven is rejoicing. I'm seeing praise hands in the comments. Heaven is turning up, and so are we. You have just started the number one relationship you need in your life, and now you're aimed, and you're ready to win. Hey, listen, if you made that decision, I'm so excited. That's what all of this is for. And I want you to text the number on the screen right now. And when you text that number we're gonna send you some resources We want to help you many of you that are that are watching right now to need to get in community You need to get in small groups and we have tons of them go to the app and look at them Some of you need to take the next step and you need to give Because your heart has been bound up because you've been your own provider and God's saying you got to give something You need to you need to get out of your own control and trust me some of you need to do that Others of you need to just invite all of your friends. I'm telling you next week. We're going to a whole nother level of rip up the list is coming and I'm telling you right now you need to wear protective gear because what God has given me for next week is going to change the trajectory of our lives and help us win in relationships I love you so much I'm praying for you I'm standing with you no matter what weapon has formed it won't work no weapon formed against you will prosper God is for you and we know that God has a plan for your life that's bigger than the pandemic we're in right now.

1:14:08 Father, bless your people. I thank you that this week will be the best week we've ever had. Joy will overtake our household. You will speak and give us revelation and reveal to us how this message applies to us. And Father God, you are going to be our number one relationship goal. We trust you, we believe you, and we thank you. In Jesus' name. Somebody say, we agree. Amen. We'll see you next week. Live a transformed life. Thank you so much for watching this message. And if this has impacted you in any way, I'm asking you to do a couple of things. Number one, join Transformation Nation. Join us right here every Sunday. Gather your friends and your family and be a part of not just this moment, but this movement. The second thing I would ask you to do is share. Share this with your friends, your co-workers, people that are around you, because transformation is just one click away.

1:15:02 ask you to do is partner with us financially. If this ministry is impacting your life, transforming you, I would ask you to consider, pray about what you could give to help us take this message to the whole world. I want you to know that we love you and your best days are right in front of you. This week, I want you to live a transformed life. See you next week.