The Gift of Forgiveness · How to Forgive Someone · FU · Forgiveness University (Part 1)

0:59 It's because I've been gone for almost eight weeks, and I've been on sabbatical, and this is my first Sunday back. I am spiritually constipated. I want to let everybody know. And today I am going to let loose. So I don't care what someone's like, oh, my God, that's so nasty. Listen to me. This is how I feel right now. I'm excited. God has been speaking to me. Before I get into what God has told me to do, I just want to say thank you to Transformation Nation. You are the best church in the world. Over seven weeks, me and Pastor Natalie have been away and we've been resting and we've been relaxing. And the one thing that I have always asked God to do is give me a church that I don't have to lead in a way that will allow us to not last. And because I have a church that would allow us to go away for seven weeks on sabbatical after being pastors for five years and be able to recharge. And you kept giving.

1:54 And you kept coming. And you kept inviting people. And more people got saved. And outreaches happened. And our message of representing God to the lost people and found people for transformation in Christ kept going. I, as your pastor, on behalf of me and Pastor Nali, I want to say thank you. because the church is not built on one person. And I need everybody to say that. It's built on the sacrifice of so many. And because of your faithfulness, we've been able to help people. We've been able to transform lives and the mission is going forward. So I'm back. You hear what I'm saying? I'm back. But I just want to let you know that the proof that we're a strong church is what happens when I'm gone. And you have been an amazing church. So right now, Transformation Nation all over the world, in Zambia, in England, in Texas, California and Utah can we give God praise for our amazing church and what we oh come on and what we get to be a part of hallelujah well y'all ready y'all ready Y'all ready?

3:02 I'm ready. Okay, stop, stop, stop. I, like, y'all, I had to ask my wife to give me melatonin last night with the kids because I was so excited about what God has given me. Every year when I go away, I spend seven days in a random hotel where only my wife and my assistant know where I'm at. And I seek God. And I pray. And God confirmed in me so strong this series that we're about to go into. and so today I need everybody to open your hearts matter of fact what I need you to do right now is you need to text somebody right now and let them know that the ministry that they need is about to happen come on right now I'll give you two seconds to text somebody right now because I'm telling you the burden that God has dropped on my heart is about to change the trajectory of so many people's lives and I know there's some people right now they're like I'm ready I'm ready for this forgiveness series and others of you are tiptoeing to the screen right now because you don't know what's about to happen because you've been hurt in some very deep ways what I promise you is that God is about to do something that changes you from the inside out everybody say from the inside I'll come on say it again from the inside out a lot of times what we try to do is change from the outside in and God said that's not how the kingdom works I change people from the inside out. So before we start this series, I want to pray. I want to pray because this is going out all over the world right now. And I want to pray that God would open up your hearts. Now, there's something that I like to tell people. God's a gentleman. He won't force his way into your life. And there are many people right now that want God to barge in. He's going to stand at the door of your heart and he's going to not. So today through this prayer, I'm asking that you would let God in. And if you let him in, I promise you all kinds of amazing things can happen, but you got to let him in. So right now, I just want you to do this in a posture. Just open your hands wide in your home right now on the porch while you're running. I know somebody running and they're going to look at you and like, what is going on? But right now I want you to put your

5:07 hands like this and I want us to pray. Father God, today, here we are. Father God, you know every broken piece of us. You know the parts that we show people. You know the parts that we keep reserved. You know the hurts. You know the pains. God, you know our successes and our failures, and today we're bringing it all to you. We're casting our crowns before your feet right now, God, and we're asking that you would take everything that we are and everything that we aren't, and we're asking, Father God, that you would do surgery on us today. Father God, there are areas of our life that we don't even know why they've been held back, and I thank you through this series that you're about to take us and move us and progress us past where we've been. Holy Spirit, we need you. We don't need another clever sermon series. We don't need something that we just post. We need the Holy Spirit, the God of the universe, the comforter to come stand in our situations and change us from the inside out. So Father God, right now, here we are and we let you in. We're opening the door to everything that we've kept other people out. Father, we're opening the door. Father, you know it anyway. So, Father, come in and be who you are, the great physician.

6:16 Change us, renew us, and transform us. In Jesus' name, we agree. Come on, somebody say amen. I need to see it in the chats. Why don't you give God a shout of praise right there as well? Hallelujah. All right. Get your notepads out. Get your smartphones. Get your dumb phones, because we are about to start week one of a series we're calling FU.

6:46 I absolutely love being the pastor of Transformation Church because I can title a series FU. And as I thought about this whole concept of forgiveness and being in forgiveness university, I need to be hot real quick, and that's humble, open, and transparent. That's what we do at Transformation Church. A lot of people are too saved for that title. Like I said, F you, and you just got offended, you got frustrated, and some of y'all churchy people's like, oh, my God, I cannot. You start speaking in tongues and everything. But if we're honest, that's how we feel when people offend us. Can we, Transformation Church, are y'all here today? When people offend us on whatever level, we're like, F you. And I'm talking about the expletive you and you may not say it out loud But you feel it in your heart and some of y'all go to the next level You don't say the actual cuss word because I know some of y'all are too safe for that But then y'all say like like the replacement cuss words and you'll be like forget you Have you ever met those people who who say words that aren't cuss words with cuss in intensity?

7:56 Y'all know what I'm talking about forget you and it's like I gotta tell this funny story story okay my dad's right over here the captain Tom Todd man of God and I remember my dad I've never heard him cuss one day in my life now the prophetess Brenda Todd she be cussing but I know she'd be acting all safe I'll tell you another time about when I was 16 and she took me driving and she said everything that was not unholy that was unholy um but anyway I never heard my daddy cuz my mama go get me after this y'all pray for me but I never heard my daddy cussed and so there was this one day that I heard the cussing intensity come out of my dad we used to travel all across the country in this big van and I have five brothers at this time or four brothers it's five Todd boys and at this time I believe there was four of us and we were traveling I think through Arizona it was like some really hot place and what ended up happening at this moment is we were all complaining because we were hungry I think the van Had some problems going on with it and all of these things and I mean everybody mama was in a front seat complaining All the kids was complaining and my dad if you know anything about Tommy Todd He has a lot of peace a lot of grace and a lot of patience like he never gets above like a three And I just saw my dad on that steering wheel of that van and he turned around and he said you bunch of sorry suckers Y'all The level of cussing intensity that came out of my father right there stopped the entire van y'all know when somebody that's this 1970s like cuz you bunch of sorry suckers like it was He hit him with that intensity, but I'm telling you it shut us all up like he said F you you hear what I'm saying Like we were all sitting there and then somebody busted out laughing and he busted out laughing But I looked at his intensity because maybe he didn't say an expletive right there But the rage and the anger and the offense that was in him it came out still and it wasn't a cuss word What I'm saying to you is you may not express it in F you But there are things and people who have done things to you and situations that have happened to you

10:06 That create something on the inside of you where you have a response to it and it's not a godly response It's a response where you about to put them hands up. Can I not be by myself today? Has anybody ever had a negative response to something that's happened to you in life? Okay? Whether that's happened to you in this way, we want to say forget you because we're offended. And in 2020, there is a million ways to be offended. Come on, let's be honest. In the climate that we live right now, in the racial climate we live in, in the political climate that we live in, whether you wear a mask or you don't wear a mask, there are so many ways to be offended. and if you look around right now many of us are carrying so much offense and we don't want to say a positive word we want to say to those people who are offenders what we want to say what i'm telling you is if it's not the expletive you it might be forget you or it might be because you were angry and disappointed or annoyed and and what ends up happening is you get offended And I want you to write this point down because this is the burden God has given me to help you offense is the gateway to unforgiveness

11:23 The reason you got to pay attention to what offends you is because it will lead you to unforgiveness and A lot of us get offended by somebody's social media post by somebody not saying happy birthday on our birthday By somebody not recognizing us when we actually did the work but they gave the credit to Timmy. And we get offended by so much. Baby, you need to let that offense go because offense is not where you land. Offense is the gateway to unforgiveness. And what most of us don't understand is that the hurt that we've gone through, the pain that we've gone through, the anger that we feel, the things that we're experiencing cause us pain.

13:17 A-D-D-Y-I dot com to learn more, including important warnings. And this is something I need you to know, that pain hurts more when it's pointless. All of us are going to go through pain. We're all going to be hurt by something. We're all going to have frustration, but pain hurts more when it's pointless. And what I'm trying to say is yes, I've been offended in 2020. Yes I've been hurt by people that were supposed to be close to me. Yes, I've been offended But I'm not gonna let this pain be pointless I'm not gonna waste this time that I've been feeling this. I'm not just gonna let it stay on me I'm gonna find purpose in my pain. Somebody needs to put that in the chat right now My pain will have purpose you left me, but I must flip that and let God use it it. You let me go but God is setting me up. My pain will not be purpose. It's not gonna be pointless.

14:17 But for our pain not to be pointless, we got to figure out how to use it. And that's why you've enrolled in this school. Forgiveness University is not about something that is ethereal because all of us have an area in our life where we want to say F you. We want to say forget you. want to say you know what I'm offended because people will frustrate you oh how many people have somebody in a life right now that frustrates them come on hands high in your living room right now all over this room yeah yeah you have people who frustrate you some of you are married to them come on don't don't don't speak too loud somebody just got in a fight y'all calm down right now but But the person that frustrates you the most is your spouse.

15:12 And you want to say F you. Another person has offense because somebody, a lot of times friends, they frame you. They point you to, they paint you to be somebody that you're not. You thought they were, they were seeing you in the right light but then they told somebody else how you really were and they framed you. Other people, you had a business deal that you thought was going to be the best thing and that business partner, they fouled you. They did something wrong. They didn't get the percentages right and now there's offense in your heart. There's other people that you've been around that have faked you. That they acted like they were one way but then they didn't actually do what they said. There are other people right now who are offended because people wanted to fight you. Some of y'all physically they wanted to fight you but in other areas there's rage and there's pain there because there has been people who have fought you emotionally and spiritually and psychologically.

16:04 And now you want to say F you because you're offended. And there's other people that have been in your life who have faulted you. Mom and dad would still be together if you didn't. The enemy comes in at this moment to try to tell you that it's your fault and now there's offense in your heart. And then for some of y'all it's on the other side of the spectrum that you were doing the wrong thing and people that loved you and prayed and asked God to give them wisdom for you and you listened to them in one season but then you started doing something wrong and then they faced you and now you're offended because they told you what you didn't want to hear in a season that they weren't listening oh I'm in somebody's business right now everybody's not a hater some people are helpers but depending on where your heart posture is you can put them in the wrong category oh the people you've been talking about they were sitting by God to help direct you there's wisdom in the multitude of counsel but if your heart is shut down you can be offended over the right thing y'all missed it and some of you are the people on the other side of that you went to the person and you tried to face them but then they talked about you and excommunicated you and now they flipped on you and the people you thought you were down with now they flipped on you and more than anything everybody there is so much offense that's happening in our lives whether we realize it or not because people will fail you can I give you a PSA announcement that everybody in your life at some point or another will fail you they will not meet your expectation they will forget to do it whether it's on purpose or illegitimately people will fail you and when failure comes from a person usually we pick up a fence but I believe that my assignment over the next 10 weeks you heard me this is a college

18:13 course you ain't coming and getting this for two weeks and getting out of here this is not community college this is a full university do you hear me accredited by the Holy Spirit You don't need a SAT or a CT score for this one because most of y'all wouldn't have made it in But thank God if you're breathing. I think my Bible says let everything that have breath Praise the Lord if you made it into this is because you had breath I dare us to take five seconds right there because somebody been needing a praise all week if you got breath Why don't you give God some praise right there?

18:48 Yup if you got breath you qualify And I want those two words of F you to be redeemed through this series. I Want those words in your life not everybody's life don't go into work and tell your boss F you don't do that You're gonna get fired. Okay, don't don't do that But in this context I want to redeem those words and I want them to have a kingdom meaning I want those words and those letters to represent the power of the Holy Spirit at work in your life Helping you practically be able to live I want those words to mean forgive you And it's gonna take work for a lot of us I'm not asking you to do it today I'm asking you to finish the course and maybe it'll change the course of your life

19:34 Because there are areas in all of our lives that have been plagued by not learning how to forgive and in this series I believe that God wants us to understand the gift of forgiveness That is a gift that forgiving and receiving forgiveness is a gift and I want us to understand the blessing of being able to forgive others. Can you write down this point real quick? Forgiveness is a primary spiritual discipline of every Christ follower. You cannot be a Christian and not forgive. its foundation if I was building a house right now the first thing they would tell me is to make sure your foundation is strong and the crazy thing about all these people who are speaking in tongues prophesying posting scriptures reading their YouVersion Bible app doing all of this stuff is they do not have a sure foundation because they don't know how to forgive there's a crack in the foundation and I know some of y'all don't tune me out already because you don't know what they did for me do you know what we did to God oh do you do you know the person requiring it has already taken on everything that we would ever do I'm getting ahead of myself ladies and gentlemen I want to welcome you to forgiveness University I love this.

21:12 Some of y'all don't know nothing about no marching band, but some of y'all bands at church school, y'all just march like this. You're going to get a little HBCU up in this mug during that. You're going to get that during this whole series, okay? I never went to college. I have literally six months of TCC education, education so I'm telling you this whole time I'm coming with face paint this is my college experience and I'm gonna be I'm gonna be hold on I got some come on come in here I've always wanted to do this y'all know I play drums right okay put this on me right here I need y'all to learn my chant look at this I love this I love this is like drum line okay I need to teach y'all our chant I'm gonna go boom boom boom boom boom you're gonna say F boom boom boom boom boom you okay I need you to follow me all right some of y'all need to get up in your house right now Y'all like is this church? It's my church. Okay, I need everybody to follow me y'all ready. I said y'all ready

22:12 Now I need you to scream it out y'all ready F you! F you!

22:33 Hey, listen. I'm going to have fun this whole series, okay?

24:01 forgiveness is a primary spiritual discipline of every christ follower what i found in my journey is that many believers i was raised in church the church teaches us to forgive but not how to forgive we know we're supposed to do it we don't know how to do it most of us think like forgiveness is like okay, they're out of my life now. I've forgiven them. No, no, no. There are people holding on to you that you'll never see again. There are situations that hold you back from things right now that happened a decade ago, 10 minutes ago, before you were even born that are still holding you. And through this series, I want to show you how to forgive. Because for many of us, Forgiveness is a principle, but it's not actually practical.

24:58 It's something that we got the concept of, but I want you to write this point down, and this is so strong in me. If forgiveness sounds cute, but it's never cultivated, it's merely a concept. Oh, yeah, I'm about to forgive them. It's like a cute thing that you have to do. No, forgiveness is dirty. Forgiveness takes work. Forgiveness is messy. Forgiveness is going and saying you did and then be like no, I did not hate you Like forgiveness is a as a constant decision to lay down your flesh again and again And there are so many believers that think it's a cute thing. I forgave them. I've moved on look how good I'm doing That's all a facade For the pain that's actually in there festering Do you know the worst type of pain is pain that you do not acknowledge and it festers and grows into something else? Many of us the outcome of our life is a little pain that was unaddressed.

25:59 That was never given to God. That was never even pointed out. And now it's festered into abuse. Nobody wakes up as a child as an abuser. That's a pain of something missing that nobody was able to put their hand on. that festered into having to have control and beat on somebody else. The worst thing about you didn't start out big, it started out small. the thing that you hate and you wish you could change it did not start out as this big thing it started out as a very small thing that was able to fester and what God is saying is you're gonna have to be intentional about forgiveness that's why you enrolled in this university is because you're saying for the next 10 weeks I'm going to be intentional somebody say intentional I'm gonna be intentional intentional about learning how to forgive and for far too many of us forgiveness is a concept but God requires it in his covenant the reason that God requires it in his covenant is because he already supplied it in his covenant see you don't realize that forgiveness is something that's already been extended to you and that's why God is saying I need you to be able to give it to others and so I need us to look at the Bible Matthew chapter 18 verse 22 I'll start at verse 21 yeah and I like Peter if I was a disciple I would probably be Peter Peter's gangster okay Peter like says stuff and ask stuff that all the other disciples want to know but Peter actually gonna say it like Peter the one that came to the garden to pray with Jesus but he brought his shank with him like he brought a knife with him to the prayer gathering God we gonna seek your face but just in case something pop off that's Peter and so in this moment Jesus is talking to the disciples and Peter's got a question like many of us have about forgiveness because this concept

28:07 It seems good, Pastor Mike, but yeah, I don't know about it. So Peter says, it says, verse 21, then Peter came to Jesus and he said, Lord, what's up, man? Like, I know you've been talking about this forgiveness thing, but I just got a real quick question. How often, I mean, you know what I'm saying? Realistically, I hear you talking very spiritually, but realistically, how often should I forgive someone? Who um how do I say this um who sins against me now? I love that he uses the terminology sins against me because we always think about sin as something that we do against God But people can sin against us and that's why you have to understand the word sin all sin means is missing The mark has anybody ever missed the mark in a relationship with you has anybody not done what they said they were gonna do That is a sin and so he's saying somebody missed the mark in my life Somebody disappointed me somebody didn't do the things that they said they were gonna do They didn't do it and now they've sinned against me. How many times should I forgive people basically who hurt me?

29:14 Look what Jesus says He know the first thing I need to let you know because I just felt a religious person come like get real prideful I felt it through the cosmos you sin sin. Everybody sins. Come here. They need to see me. Look at my face. I want you to see the sweat drops on my face. You sin. No matter how much scripture you read, no matter how many worship songs you have memorized, no matter what day of the week you go to pray at 5 a.m., you sin. and if you don't start valuing the grace and forgiveness that God has given you you will never be able to be an extension of his love to other people you sin and the reason I need you to understand that is because it's very difficult difficult to give forgiveness to somebody when you think you're better than somebody When you think you're better than your alcoholic uncle, when you think you're better than your weed-smoking cousin, when you think you're better than your cheating boss, you will never forgive them for what they do.

30:34 But baby, you sin. And until you realize that the foot of the cross is even, it's the same for the homosexual and the person who tells a white lie. Y'all don't hear me. It's the same thing for everybody who preaches in church and sleeps with the choir member, as well as, oh I mean your business, as well as the person who leads the Bible study and lied to their child. It is the same thing. And we all need the grace of God, and we all need to repent, and we all need forgiveness, F you. Until you understand, they don't even believe me. Look what the Bible says in Romans 3.23. For everyone has sinned. That includes you. And we all fall short of the glorious standard of God. Somebody just type that in the chat.

31:31 I sin. Say it out loud with me. Everybody say, I sin. I think next week, Charles, I'm going to have to talk about sin. In the way that the enemy tries to distort where we are and what God has done to supply forgiveness to everybody I think I'm gonna have to because I feel that thing super strong and and and so you have to know that Peter was talking from a more Self-righteous standpoint at this point How many times should we forgive these people? These heathens These these thoughts Ask a young person what that means. Multicultural church, multigeneration, I got to bring it all together. How many times should we forgive these bad people?

32:25 How many times should we forgive these Democrats? How many times should we forgive these Republicans? Oh, I'm coming to your house. How many times should we forgive these racist bigots? Come on. Come on, because we all have a level of person that we think is beyond God's forgiveness. And if, this is crazy to think, if God can forgive them, maybe they need to work harder because I'm not going to forgive them. Now, how is God going to forgive somebody you won't forgive? Let me stop. So Peter's talking, how many times? And then I love this. He tries to throw out what I call the fake grace number. the facade he's like I mean how many times like seven wow that that should be enough seven yeah but y'all think I mean yeah like if they sent against seven times like yeah and it was almost from a prideful place and look I love Jesus because I can see him thinking about Peter Peter thinking how good that answer was like yeah I'm gonna forgive seven times in my lifetime Like if they cross me, I'm going to give one to them, one to them.

33:42 I'm not giving them any. I'm going to give one to them. And we have no concept of how long Peter was talking about. The Bible never says seven times in one week, one day, one year. It doesn't give us the connotation. But I love how God leaves it open so that he can convict our spirit on certain things. Because there's people that you will forgive and then there's people that you like, but they beyond forgiveness. And look what Jesus says to him. He says, no, Pedro.

35:31 Not siete times. That's the only Spanish I know. Shout out to all transformation Latinas in the building. It says, um, and Jesus just blows it out of the water. He says, um, no, Peter, not seven times, but 70 times seven. Yeah, that'll work. 70 times seven. That's how many times you should forgive. And Jesus doesn't bring any clarity to it either. 70 times 7 in my lifetime? 70 times 7 a month? A week? A day? How many times should you forgive? Let's just, for the sake of doing math at this university, let's just say Jesus says, no, not 7 times, but do it 7 times 70 a day.

36:29 Put on your math hat, university students. What's seven times 70? Some of y'all like carry the three and then subtract minus. It's 490. So if God says hypothetically you're supposed to give 490 times a day. 490 times 30 days. That's 14,700 times a month. 14,700 times times 12 which is the number of months in a year is 176,400 times a year that you're supposed to be forgiving. What I'm trying to tell you is forgiveness is a primary spiritual discipline of every Christ follower and my question to you is have you forgiven one person this year? No, for real, have you let them go? Have you released them of the debt?

37:23 Have you let them walk free? Even if they meant to do it, it hurt you and it was on purpose. I Don't know how past the mic that's why you can't flunk out of this class Because if you don't learn this you will derail your destiny holding on to people who were not even supposed to be a part of it in the first place And today I want you to understand that God wants to teach you how to forgive Somebody needs to say I want to know how to forgive come on. Just say it out of your mouth I want to know how to forgive yeah, I'm not asking anybody to do it today That you don't ever start a college course knowing how to do what you'll end up doing at the end of it today I just want you to desire to be able to do that somebody just say I want to be able to forgive and I pray by the Spirit of God for every lie of the enemy that's trying to tell you you can't do that They are no match for our God and his word and his spirit that is alive and active in your life right now Now that manager who took advantage of you you're gonna be able to forgive them that parent who was negligent And didn't do what they were supposed to do you're gonna be able to forgive them that teacher who spoke doubt to your dream When you were so in person of impressionable God said By the end of this series by faith You're going to be able to forgive

38:51 I feel the presence of God right now people are getting hope for the first time that they may be able to walk free from the person who raped them. Oh, I'm going to be so, so direct. Because it happened to you. But it's still on you.

39:13 You didn't want it to happen. You didn't allow it to happen. You didn't feel like it was fair. But now, if you don't make that pain have purpose, it hurts more. And today, I believe by the power of God, he's coming to give us the first step. Somebody say the first step. The first step in our process of healing and deliverance. Look at Luke 638. This revelation that God gave me on this scripture messed me up, and I want to share it with you. Luke 638 I have heard this scripture over and over there's some churchy people right now who could quote Luke 638 to me right now and we're gonna read it this is um a scripture that you usually hear at offering time so I'm gonna get real churchy just for a second because I love Luke 638 give and it will be given to you help me a good measure what press down Shaking together and what running over Will it be poured into your lap sitting on my lap big daddy

40:23 Like people preach this all the time for with the measure you use It will be measured back to you now. This is the thing that I want to teach everybody about reading the Bible context is everything so people read Luke 6 38 and they basically try to tell people give money and when you give money that it'll come back to you good measure pressure down shaking together and running over and I actually do believe the principle of reaping and sowing and reaping that's the principle there so so I want you to know that when you do give it does come back to you but that was not the primary thing that God was talking about in this the way that you find context let me help you class read before and after whatever you've been looking at so let's go up to Luke 6 37 and find the context of what was being said it literally says do not judge and you will not be judged judged have y'all out right there do not condemn and you will not be condemned you know how you write people off after they have a bad experience or a public failure and we have this cancel culture be careful because the Bible says do not condemn, then you will not be condemned.

41:41 Now look at this one. Oh my God, I can't believe it. Forgive and you will be forgiven. Give and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use judgment, condemnation, and forgiveness, will it be measured back to you.

42:07 You ever heard somebody that's talking real big online and then you're going to meet up with that person and they say, you better bring that same energy when we see each other in person. Bring that same energy. What God is saying to you is the measure that you judge people with, the measure that you condemn people with, the measure that you don't forgive people with, you better bring that same energy when you need it. When you mess up, when you make a mistake, when it was, I didn't really mean to, I didn't know I would offend people like that. When you in that space, you better bring the same energy. I think about celebrities all the time, how common folk be going off on celebrities for the situations that happen in public. You better bring that same energy when it happens to you in private.

42:52 When your own four friends know about you, you know that's not me. You know that is not me. I just want everybody to see me for who I really am. Are you seeing other people for who they really are? Bring that same energy. And that's what God is saying right down this point. It changed everything for me. In forgiveness, your measure becomes your metric. The measure you use is now the metric God uses on you for what's going on in your life. So you want to be judgmental and throw people away? God says, I didn't set the metric you did by the measure you gave to somebody else. So the reason why all of these people are leaving is because you left when the other person went through it you set the metric

43:46 I am giving you bars right now if you want grace to come to your life You better measure grace out to people so that you set the right metrics if you want favor to come to your life You better measure favor out when somebody's at their lowest moment when somebody's back is against the wall when somebody is going through you better measure out one in a different season you want to experience because the measure of forgiveness is now the thing that God uses as the metric in your life and that's why for many of us we're still holding people and stewing over situations in our mind and carrying contempt in our heart and waiting and worry and framing our lives with frustration. It's because we won't actually forgive. We won't change the measure.

46:03 That offense is everywhere. And remember what I told you. Offense is the gateway to what? Unforgiveness. It starts with an offense and that's the light thing that happens. But the dark destination of offense is unforgiveness. Write down this point. Offense is either picked up or put on. Offense is either picked up or put on. What I want you to know is offense is all around us.

46:38 Offense is coming and offense is going. Offense happens online. Offense happens when we're driving. offense happens when we're speaking um um at a conference offense happens it just passes us a fence just goes past us and I see a fence and I come in contact I see a fence I come in contact but the thing that you got to realize is as a fence is going past me I'm not picking it up but there's a problem I I ran late at work uh-uh and you cut me off and you flip me off and I chose to pick up a fence.

47:15 And see, this is the thing. I let that offense go by and I let that offense go by. But a fence is either picked up or put on. No, you're a racist. You shouldn't have made that comment online and I picked up a fence. And what happens is now I gotta go through my day and I gotta worship God and I gotta love on other people and I gotta do all this stuff. But I'm choosing to either let a fence go by, it's in the air, or I'm gonna pick it up. And the problem is some of us are so used to you said you was gonna actually be my girl and you left me Now I'm gonna pick up a fence and you said that you were gonna be my business partner But I'm gonna pick up a fence and I keep going through life and I keep letting people go and it's been eight years now and I'm walking around in my life but then something happened my sister she didn't she didn't I didn't pick it up but she put it on me she let her friend come over and sexually abuse me and she knew do you see four of the offenses I picked up but the one from my family member she put on and there's some of us that are dealing with offensives some that we picked up But others that we put on that were put on us by family members our coaches or people that were close to us And now I'm more offended. Don't you ever talk to me like that again at my job Did you look at me crazy? I'm taking offense you better get the f away from me. Oh You you gonna act like that's not how you actually talk The person at the gym they took my machine You're a Trump supporter?

48:57 Huh? You're a Trump supporter? Huh? Huh? Now let me go reach my destiny. Good morning, Transformation Church. I want to give God praise for using me. Hey, hey, can we Netflix and chill? Can we, yeah. Hold on, you put that on me because I thought we were going to be together and you left me at the altar.

49:24 You want me to have it, you don't want to help me carry it? and then there's somebody that comes over, and you're the one that cheated. So guess who she cheated with? You were my best friend. And so now... The offense becomes the seat of unforgiveness. It's the place now that I get comfortable. This is the place now where I like to be. It's more comfortable to live in a place where I've let the offense now become my new normal. and every morning I wake up with unforgiveness in my heart and I never can extend to anybody else what I have not received for myself why are you telling me this pastor Mike because some of you are so offended and that offense now has turned into the bed of your unforgiveness and now God's saying I need you to let that go because I have a plan and a destiny for you that's bigger than anything that's happened to you or been put on you put on you by family members put on you by friends put on you by lost situations put on you by teachers put on you I feel the presence of the Holy Spirit right now because this is a picture depicting some of your lives and now you've got kids and you're teaching them hold on to everything.

51:12 Don't let go. Your daddy left us. He ain't nothing but a sorry sucker. And then God says, I got a plan for you, moving purpose. Okay, God, I'm going after you. I'm chasing after you no matter what I have to do. Because I need you more and more. God, I'm going to finish everything. Hold on, I'm coming. I'm coming. But I can't leave without these offenses. God, I'm going to do exactly what you told me to do. But I need to make sure that I have all of these fences and I remember so nobody can ever do me like that again. I'm going to make sure I keep all the scars. If you can use anything, Lord, you can use me. This is how we present ourselves, a holy and a living sacrifice before God.

52:13 Here I am, Lord. And God can give you a simple instruction. Lift your hand. Like literally I can't lift this. Like I'm... This is a little embarrassing. I can't lift it.

52:38 Because it was too heavy for me to carry in the first place. And the problem is, is that even though your Instagram is popping, this is what your inner man looks like. The father who wasn't there, the girlfriend, the boyfriend who didn't do what they said they were going to do. The professor who didn't pass you, and you told them the real reason that you missed the clap, they didn't have any grace for you. Maybe it was because they never received that grace. Now what ends up happening to people who carry all of this baggage around is it's hard to fit through the doors that God calls you to. with all of this baggage. If I took all of this on a plane, I couldn't occupy my seat.

53:33 If I took all of this baggage with me, it's very difficult to preach to you and to do what I've been called to do, what is already ordained for me to do. It's hard for me to love my wife, to even hug her with all of this baggage. This is the reason why some of your sexual lives husbands and wife have never been able to find that passion it's because you're bringing all the other people who hurt you into the bed with you it's hard to connect when you're carrying the weight and the baggage offense is either picked up or put on look what Matthew 5 23 says it says so if you were presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, leave your sacrifice there at the altar and go and be reconciled with the person.

54:26 Go forgive the person. Then come back and offer your sacrifice to God. This messed me up because there's so many pastors, worship leaders, small group leaders that are trying to serve God to feel better, but they're serving them with all this unforgiveness. And God said, I'd rather you not serve and go make it right than to come up in here with all this baggage because you only are going to bleed onto the people that you lead. You're only going to transfer this same type of burden into other people. And so what I found is this point, write this down. God values the posture of your heart over the prosperity of your hand. He would rather the posture of your heart be right Then you bring up your treasure to him. I Know this is different teaching but this is how important forgiveness is He says yeah, you could be great for my use in missions all over the world are starting that Nonprofit are doing all this, but I'd rather you get your heart right

55:31 Before you do great exploits for me And that's why we have to forgive And do you know what this is physically producing in me right now? And what it's spiritually producing in you when you're walking around with all of this? It's producing forgiveness fatigue.

55:51 Because I let that one person go, but more stuff happened. And then I let them go, but I'm tired of forgiving. How many more times is this going to happen? I forgave them. It just seems like there's always more. and the truth of the matter is there's so many people listening to me right now.

57:28 You tried to forgive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 times, but now you're walking in forgiveness fatigue. I don't want to forgive no more. I guess I'll just live with it. I know I won't reach the purpose that God has for me, but shoot. I guess this is what I'm going to have to deal with.

57:53 And what I'm telling everybody is offense is either picked up or put on. But offense can always be laid down. It always can be laid down. it always can be laid down. And that's what I'm praying for everybody in this series. Because that forgiveness fatigue, it's fighting your faith. Some of y'all have been in the war of your life just trying to believe God again. It's fighting your faith. It's framing your faith. Like everything that you see, you don't see it right because you're so tired of having to deal with people. Some people would say life would be great if people weren't in it. And God said, that's not the world I made you in, but I've given you a tool to be able to help you be able to walk even with the pain, even with the frustration. It's framing your faith and ultimately it's failing your faith. That's why Galatians 6, 9 tells us, and let's not get weary in doing good.

58:55 For in due season, we shall reap if we do not lose what? Heart. That's what god wants. He wants your heart posture to be right There's people you need to forgive that you'll never have an actual conversation with them again But your heart posture has to be right towards that person I'm not telling you that once you forgive now we need to be buddies again We're gonna talk about that later on in the series because i'm gonna teach you how to walk with actual boundaries How to make sure that you're using wisdom, which is applied knowledge that your pain is not pointless I'm gonna help you walk through all of that, but I'm asking you if they came into the room right now What does your heart posture say? If they called you this week, what would happen in your heart? And God is saying Yeah It may have happened to you Or you may have picked it up But you can always lay it down first Peter 5 7 casting all your cares that's throwing them I'm done with this I'm sick of this I'm not going to keep holding them my father was not there but my father God is there my family and friends forsake me but he'll never leave or forsake me I'm casting all my cares not upon Instagram I'm not writing a sonnet to let everybody know how I feel because they can't actually fulfill anything that's going on with you.

1:00:25 I'm casting all my cares upon him. Why? Because he cares for you. And this is why God gives us these very hard truths to swallow. But they're necessary in our lives to survey Luke 17, verse 3. So watch yourselves. Watch yourselves. Because if any believer sins or misses the mark, rebuke that believer or that person. And all rebuke means is directly correct. Hey, that's not the way that we do that. You can rebuke somebody in love. You don't have to be a butthole and mean to rebuke somebody. Hey, that's not how we do that. That's not how we talk to people. That's not how you handle somebody else's spouse. That's not how you directly correct that person. then if there is repentance all repentance means is to turn and i believe so strongly that's what many of you are going to do today that's what the sermon is bringing value to the idea and the principle and literally the prerequisite to a christian life it is bringing value to the principle of forgiveness and god's saying i just need you to turn i need you to see that it's not cool or hard to hold people it's like if that fool ever mess with me again bro i promise you on sight. God is not looking at you like, that's my boy. The one who's angry and doesn't have peace and won't give me his burdens. That's the one that I want to use. He's saying, yeah, I want to use you, but you got to lay that crap down. You got to give that to me. You got to let me be the one to carry this. He's saying for those people, he said, even if that person wrongs you seven times a day and each time turns again and asks for forgiveness look at this you must forgive that wasn't you have an option to forgive but they slept with my husband You! We're not talking about them.

1:02:19 you they don't matter at this point you must forget and I know some people logging off right now you're tuning out right now it's okay you'll be in bondage for the rest of your life you'll be carrying all these bags and we'll try to help you but until you realize you must forgive somebody say must. It's not a suggestion. It's not a good idea. God's saying, even if they do it over and over and over again, you must forgive. Now look, I love the Bible. Look at the disciples response. It says, the apostle said to the Lord, show us how to increase our faith. they made the correlation that if I'm going to be able to forgive them Negroes, I have to not have more patience, more love.

1:03:24 I need more faith. My last point that I want you to get today, because this is just the introduction to the class, the messages God has given me for the rest of the series. Charles, am I captain? I got 10 messages locked and loaded, don't I? This is Jenny Garth from 90210MG.

1:04:56 Forgiveness, write this down. Forgiveness requires faith. you will not be able to forgive them on your own. You will not be able to forgive them because you feel bad. You will not be able to forgive them because they deserve it. You will not be able to forgive them. The only way that you can forgive people who mistreat you, who use you wrong, who talk bad about you, who do things to you is you must have faith. and today God is saying you cannot put your faith in the person you have to put your faith in me who's over the person forgiveness requires say faith faith so many people act like they have faith and so I say show me your forgiveness prove to me you got faith by the people you forgave well I want to do mighty exploits for God why don't you talk to them anymore what happened here and God is saying it was like I'm tired of people standing up and declaring faith but behind the scenes have no evidence of it forgiveness is a place that requires us to have faith in God what are you saying Pastor Mike this is the start the start of understanding the FU forgiveness university being able to forgive others is going to be a process that's going to take all of us staying focused on the one who can change us from the inside out because I cannot forgive the young man who touched me illegitimately when I was five or six years old. I can't forgive him off of good, good, good, good feelings. I can't forgive the coach who made me doubt myself and my abilities. I can't forgive him

1:07:05 because he deserves it. I'm pissed. I want to say F you and I mean the expletive you. but then God requires me to forgive them how am I supposed to do that faith that's why when the scripture says we walk by faith not feelings because many of us we want that scripture to work we walk by feelings and not by sight because I feel this and I feel this and God said hey feelings is gonna be there but if you're a believer you have to walk by faith Every step of letting people go will be a walk of faith. Every time I don't cuss them out, boy, that was faith at work in me right there because I was about to die. every time you show up for thanksgiving will be a step of faith every time you go back to that job some of y'all going back to a job tomorrow that's what we're going to require you not to walk in unforgiveness but it will be the fact that you got up and went will be a step of faith and god's saying like the disciples said hey i want to increase your faith for the level of forgiveness that has to happen in these 10 weeks today look at me i'm not asking you this week to forgive anybody i know most pastors want to give you the message and then have you do it today not uh this one's gonna take time you don't have to forgive nobody this week all i'm asking you to pray is like these apostles pray god increase my faith matter of fact i feel that hands lifted everywhere all over this thing that's what we're going to pray. This is how we're going to end. We're going to ask God to increase our faith. Not that we could forgive Johnny or be able to forgive our mother or forgive our brother.

1:08:55 Right now, that's later. Right now, not forgive the business partner or that employee that left us or that person that wouldn't talk bad about us. We're not doing that right now. Right now, we're going to ask God, just increase my faith because I can't do this without you. Holy God, here we are on the first week of this series, asking you, God, to increase our faith. We cannot let go of the baggage that has been put on us and that we've picked up without you. You said, God, that you would be close to us when we were brokenhearted. So today, here we are with our business degrees, with the money in the bank, with no one around, Father, wherever we're at at life. We're asking you, Father, increase our faith. because if you're requiring us to forgive them and if you're requiring us to forgive that God that's gonna be hard but I'm so glad that you're not a God that requires something you won't help us with so today father God I'm asking right now as I lead tens of thousands of people on this journey God if you don't let me minister anything that you're not doing in me so God right Now I'm asking you, increase my faith.

1:10:10 Come on, you say it out of your mouth, God, increase my faith. Come on, at your house right there, say increase my faith, Father. Father, some of us need to forgive people that are sitting next to us. Some of us need to forgive people that birthed us. Some of us need to forgive people, Father, that we call best friend. Some of us need to forgive people that we work with every day. Some of us need to forgive people, Father God. we need to forgive the people we see in the mirror God some of us just need to forgive ourselves but Father if we're going to be able to forgive ourselves for the things we did that we said we'd never do we need you to increase our faith God I thank you that you are locking a group of people in on this journey to walk in full deliverance I declare and I believe that the chains that have been holding people down for years are breaking in the name of Jesus Holy Spirit, I'm asking you father God to draw back people here every week to find out not what pastor Mike has to say But what you have to say to not just let us know that we need to forgive but to show us how to forgive And father God when we start walking free When we start walking in freedom, Father, when people start noticing that there's something different, when the joy of the Lord truly is our strength, when relationships are being reconciled and we're walking free from whatever everybody else is doing, Father God, we won't take the credit for it.

1:11:40 But we will be careful to give you all the glory, all the honor, and all the praise because you are the God who first forgave us. So today, before we ask to give us strength to forgive anybody else, right now, we're going to stop and we're going to praise you for forgiving us. I dare you right now to lift your voice all over this place, at your home, and thank God for forgiving you. increase our faith God so that we can extend what you've done to us and done for us to others in Jesus name somebody say amen I have so much content that I need to share baby did I do okay okay she knows like I've been spitting everything up on her She literally is the reason we're doing this sermon series.

1:12:37 She helped me get this sermon series and the Holy Spirit refined it. I don't like begging, Charles. I beg you. lock in with this year by christmas you can walk in freedom if you understand how to forgive and i'm declaring over your life this week that it will be the best week you've ever had that the holy spirit will begin to show you things that you're gonna come before god and he's gonna to be able to help you and even in the areas where some of you right now I feel it so strong you're so angry right now because the idea of forgiving those people makes you feel vulnerable and makes you feel offended again I'm telling you that God by his spirit is going to do a supernatural work on the inside of you I'm so hype about what God's going to do and I need you to share this with everybody I'm saying some of y'all need to text your whole family you need to understand that All these principles God's going to illuminate go back and watch the message again You're going to get something brand new out of it stay in the word of God and i'm telling you that at fu forgiveness university I believe you're going to graduate valedictorian of this class That you're going to be able to walk and you're going to be able to teach generations how to forgive It won't just end with you, but it's going to pass on the generation to generation You're going to have you're going to have an alma mater. This is going to be your alma mater You're going to tell people something.

1:14:10 I'm going to tell my kids that I graduated from FU University. And we're going to be able to walk in forgiveness. I love you. I believe in you. And I thank God for you. Today is the beginning of a master's class, a master's class, a master's degree. That's going to change your destiny. And I will see you right here next week. In Jesus' name, go out and live a transformed life. I love it. Wow. Wow. Such a powerful, powerful message on forgiveness. Man, thank you, Pastor.