The Burden of Bitterness - Bishop Rudolph Mckissick, Jr.

0:33 The Lord has afflicted me. The Almighty has brought misfortune upon me. Amen. You may be seated in the very presence of our God. I want to preach tonight as the Spirit shall guide with this thought in our minds, the burden of bitterness. The burden of bitterness. I start this this sermonic missive off with a statement that nobody in here is really probably going to like and that is you will not live this life without experiencing some hardships as Dr. Cosby has already said in spite of what the pimp preachers of prosperity tell you Jesus said in the word in this life not you may not you might not it's possible not it's hypothetical but you shall have tribulations it is unavoidable and the reality is some things will come into your life some things will happen in your life you will not pray it away you will not bind it away you will have tribulations. You can experience things for which there is no explanation.

2:10 Sickness, layoff, ending of a marriage, racist or misogynistic boss, xenophobic professor, backstabbers. And it happens without warning. You will have hardships. But the good news tonight is while you will have hardships, hardships don't have to have you. I've come to discover Marcus that there is a difference between a setback and a set up. And sometimes watch this, the setback or the set up can happen in the same situation because what determines whether or not a situation is a setback or a set up is how you handle the set. It is not the trouble that determines whether or not I am set back or come up.

3:04 It is how I handle it. And the reality is nothing should ever be a setback because you win some. No, you learn some. But you lose none. Let me say that again. You win some, you learn some, but you never lose any. Touch your neighbor and tell your neighbor, I know that's right. It's how you handle it. As a matter of fact, there are people who are worse off than you, but went through less than you. Jesus. It's not always the severity of the situation, but the tenacity of the faith of the person who's going through the situation. People who have no faith but claim they walk through the Lord can go through less but end up worse. It's learning how to manage what I wish I could have avoided.

4:03 Going to the doctor and hearing you've got cancer. Opening up your child's phone and seeing what you didn't teach them. Coming home to a spouse who says they don't want to be married anymore. being called in at work to tell, being told you're being laid off. Let me tell you something about life. I know y'all ain't going to like this introduction. You probably ain't going to like the whole sermon, but y'all be all right. Let me tell you something about life. I don't care how much you love Jesus. I don't care how many tongues you speak in. I don't care how much oil get rubbed all on your forehead, how many times you fall out with a white sheet over your body, how many conferences you go to. Let me tell you about life. something can come into your life at some point that makes absolutely no sense. I wish, I really wish I could just tell you to trust in Jesus and life will never throw you a curve ball, but the reality is stuff happens. And I know that ain't a deep and profound theological explanation for some of the hell that some of y'all are catching, but stuff happens. It makes no sense. Logically, It makes no sense analytically.

5:13 We pray that it doesn't happen. But when we go through things, we can become better or we can become bitter. Naomi to me is an example of how you have to learn how to manage life with the hand you've been dealt. There have been three funerals. For Naomi, it involved her husband and her two sons. There were actually two daughters-in-law. there was Orpah and then the one all of us know about Ruth. And when Naomi leaves Moab to return home, she advises both of them to not follow her. One of them, the one that was Orpah, listened and went back home. After all, they were both young. They were young enough to start their life over. But Ruth looks at her and begins to speak those words that we oftentimes say at weddings. I don't know why we say it at weddings because this wasn't a wedding context.

6:06 But we say, entreat me not to leave thee, for where you lodge, I'll lodge. Your God will be my God. And Ruth decides to go back with her. And where our text takes up, they are at the edge of the town. And the people in the town recognize Naomi. They call her by her name. And she cuts them off and tells them, stop calling me that. Call me Mara. This is very interesting. I knew I'd have two scholars that I was preaching in front of, Dr. Haynes, Dr. Cosby. It's interesting to me, y'all, because this is the only instance in the Bible where a name change goes from good to bad.

6:49 Every other name change goes from bad to good. Her name, Naomi, meant pleasant. It meant sweet. But Mara means bitter. She says, don't call me that because the way my life has gone, my life has been anything but sweet. From now on, call me bitter. And I wrestled y'all whether or not to preach this tonight. I really did. I wrestled. I've been gone for a year. This is my comeback. And I wrestled whether to preach this because I knew this is the kind of sermon. ain't nobody gonna say amen stand up and clap because you don't want your neighbor to think you the one going through bitterness i wrestled and i wrestled because i was like lord this ain't the kind of sermon they want to hear and then the holy spirit worked because he had marcus do want to do it because i knew i wasn't gonna get none of that tonight and i wrestled and wrestled and wrestled and wrestled but the lord said to me son i need you to preach this tonight Because there are people in the church masquerading like things are well when deep down inside they are being eaten alive with the spirit of bitterness.

8:05 Bitterness is an inward condition. It will manifest itself in various ways. losing your temper, high blood pressure, irritability, sleeplessness, obsession with getting even, depression, isolation, pervasive pessimism. Look straight ahead. And when bitterness is not properly handled, it will not only impact you, but it will impact everybody around you. because bitterness, when not dealt with, leads to brokenness. And when you are broken, you break everything around you. Okay, I'm not coming through. Let me be Freddie Haynes for one minute. We had a hurricane last year, and one day Kim and I were sitting in the kitchen, and I noticed the ceiling was dripping water. Ceiling was dripping water.

9:01 I mean, it was dripping, turned brown. So I called the roofers over and the ceiling people over rather, and they came and before they could do anything, the ceiling started talking to me. the ceiling said Shakespeare said there's sermons in stones come and get some sense from a ceiling the ceiling said Mac I'm mad with you I said why are you mad with me the ceiling said because you are accusing me of something that really ain't my fault I said what you mean you dripping all this water down on my hardwood floor you dripping all this water all on my kitchen table in the nook He said, that's the problem. You keep blaming me for this. I'm not the thing that's broken. It's the roof.

9:53 I said, well, if it's the roof, how come you are the one that's dripping? He said, because when something is broken, it leaks down on whatever is close to it. Y'all didn't hear what I just said. That's why you've got to be careful hanging out with broke folk. because when they are broken in their spirit, they will leak on you and everybody will think you're the problem when in reality, you ain't the problem. It's who's leaking on you. The reason some of your children ain't right is because you're the roof leaking on them. The reason some of your marriage ain't right is because you're the... See, I cried, y'all done got now. You've got to deal with bitterness because bitterness is a broken roof leaking on a ceiling. And I came tonight to help somebody get delivered.

10:50 You've got to relinquish bitterness because when you relinquish bitterness, you give an open invitation for the Holy Spirit to give you peace and joy. Stop saying all this stuff, but you got to protect your peace. That ain't even biblical. the Bible says and the peace of God which passes all understanding will guard your heart y'all didn't get it that word guard in the Greek is a military term that implies there are soldiers all around your peace whose only assignment is to protect your mind so you don't lose your peace. So stop walking around here talking about I'm protecting my peace.

11:44 It ain't your job to protect your peace. It's God's job to protect your peace. But when you get bitter, you send God's angels on a break so you can act like you want to act with your mind. preacher how do I deal with bitterness I can't shout through this one tonight preacher you messing with me I feel the tension in the room oh I feel it I've been preaching a long time I feel the tension in the room because the devil has had a hold of y'all for so long and he made the mistake of letting you get to church tonight and some of y'all that are honest enough to know you've been bitter you ought to serve notice on the devil that in the next 40 minutes he's had his last day of making you hold on to something that ain't destroying nobody but you.

12:50 Tonight is the night where you get delivered. Let me show you how. Let me show you how. Here's the first thing. Don't stay stuck because of what you don't know. Huh? Huh? If you would go back and read this chapter from the beginning, my late homolex professor, Dr. Miles Jerome Jones, you say some of the best preaching ain't what's on the line is what's between the line. When we're introduced to Naomi, watch this. We are introduced to her after her husband and sons have died. Her two sons have died. Her husband has died. And the Bible never says, Freddie, why they died. we don't know why they die. We have no answers.

13:44 All we know is they die. Come here. The reality of life is that we must often live with unanswered questions. Preach, boy. See, sometimes faith is trusting God's answer while living in the tension of ambiguity. Faith is I'm trusting you even though I don't even understand what you up to. I'm trusting you even though I don't have an answer for why you allowed me to go through what I'm going through. Naomi has no answers. She's getting no revelation. Here's the problem. Our discomfort with ambiguity always pushes us to find answers. because we think we can't be at peace until we have answers. And bitterness always analyzes when it can't find answers.

14:42 Look at the text. She said, God did this to me. God put me in this predicament. God, please get that. Bitter always seeks blame. you

15:06 God, this is going to get rough in here tonight. Bitter always seeks who they can blame to make him or herself feel better. And Naomi had the nerve to go straight to the top. Since I don't have an answer for this, God, you did this to me.

15:31 She's stuck with wives. Anybody in here got some whys? Why did my child get on drugs? And you're bitter with God. Why did my husband say he don't want me no more? And you're bitter. Why did my friend who I trusted with information tell it to everybody? Jesus. Why did they fire me when I'd been loyal for 15 years? why when I never smoked did they find a mass on my lungs and now you're bitter but here's the thing God never gives her an answer because God gives you what you need not what you prefer I said it too fast y'all didn't get it God gives you what you need not what you prefer if you needed the answers you would have gotten them in order for God to move you forward so if God doesn't give you answers that means he'll give you what you need to keep going in spite of what you've been going through don't you let your curiosity get in the way of your convictions don't you let the ambiguity get in the way of your faith there are a whole lot of things i don't have answers to i have a lot of unanswered wise but what i do know is that god is still god god is still faithful and god will Keep me in perfect peace.

16:58 That's his promise. Stop giving attention to how God's going to do it and just believe that God's going to do it. I mean, after all, after all, there's some things you trust you don't have all the answers to. Think of how many things around you work perfectly and you don't have no idea how they work. You put the key in the ignition of your car. You don't need to know how the engine works to get the car to drive.

17:30 When you get on a plane, you may not be able to understand all the laws of lift, thrust, gravity, and drag, but you trust that under the discretion of the pilot, it's going to get you where you need to go. When it comes to your laptop, there are many components running only an engineer can understand, but you still use it. Not knowing how it works doesn't stop you from using it for full benefit. Well, the same is true for faith. You don't need to know how God's going to get you through this. You just need to believe that God's going to get you through this. So don't minimize God by what you can't figure out. I want you to help somebody real quick. Look them dead in the eye and tell them, I know you still ain't figured out why you went through that. But don't bring God down to the level of what you don't understand. Elevate your faith to a level that believes, even if I don't understand it, God's going to get me through it.

18:25 Even if it never makes sense, God's going to get me through it. And do I have any testimonies tonight who can say, I still don't understand why it happened, but I'm a living witness that God didn't let me lose my mind. He kept me in perfect. Stop seeking blame and start seeking peace. because when you blame you make an idol out of the person that hurt you You just determined that they were God enough to dictate your moves and your attitude. Here's the second thing.

19:23 This ain't going to be long. Here's the second thing. You have to end the pretend to start to mend. Let me say it one more time. You got to end the pretend to start to mend. James Baldwin put it this way. You can't fix what you won't face. There is, somebody's deliverance is going to be in this point right here. There is this unspoken rule in religion.

20:04 Here is the unspoken rule in religion. Pretend. Fake it till you make it. We say all this stuff that's cute but ain't correct. The reason some of y'all are on somebody's couch right now is because you almost lost your mind trying to fake health for folk that don't even like you. There's this unwritten rule. Yeah, I'm going to deliver tonight. Act like God is in control when you don't even believe he is. I know y'all ain't ready for this. Give the impression everything is okay in your life when you know it ain't. Pretend you believe when you know you got doubt. Hide your imperfections. Maintain the image of a perfect marriage with healthy, well-adjusted children when in reality you know your family is just as dysfunctional as everybody else.

21:04 Oh God, it's going to get ugly now. Put a fake life on Facebook to try to make everybody believe that your life ain't as messed up as it really is. Some of y'all live a Facebook fantasy but a jacked up reality because you convinced you got to pretend. So you taking pictures like you in first class when you walk into the back of the plane. As if where you sit makes you who you are. Y'all done got quiet now. Always posting when you got on name brand. As if making somebody else's advertisement makes you who you are. We pretend. And the church has helped us with this by turning worship into pep rallies. And worship leaders become praise bullies where they bully you into lifting your hands and you don't feel like lifting them.

22:07 They bully you into screaming, all you want to do is cry, and you faking it because everybody around you is doing it, And you've been taught, don't let folk know what you going through. Here's what I've learned. Pretending perpetuates the illusion of relationships. Watch this. By connecting us based on who we are not. What you mean? People who pretend have pretend relationships. relationships. You done got everybody convinced you close to somebody and you ain't even got their number. I sure no better leave that alone because I'll start talking for real. You got everybody convinced that y'all closer than y'all really are.

23:06 Pretending. Are you hearing me? Here's what I like about Ruth. Ruth when they say that's Naomi Ruth don't say yeah child that's me yeah child here I am Ruth does not Naomi rather does not pretend like all is well she tells them don't call me that Ain't no sense in me pretending. I can't rebuke this. I am bitter she says don't call me about how you knew me call me about what you don't know about me my life has turned bitter that's why you have to be careful how you treat folk cause you don't know what they been through in the time you ain't been with them Y'all, don't nobody want to talk to me now.

24:17 You want them to come to church and shout and run up and down and everything. But you have no clue everything they've been through. And I just want this is going to be the craziest stand up. I need some folk tonight who can be honest enough to say I ain't pretending no longer. My life is hell. I'm in pain. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. I need some stuff to shift. I'm done trying to please people that I don't even like and they don't like me. I'm going to be honest tonight. Don't come Call me by who you knew. Call me by what I am. I am bitter.

24:53 I'm mad as hell at my ex-wife. I'm mad as hell at my crazy child. I'm mad as hell at my president's boss. I'm bitter. She said I left here empty but I'm empty and it's God's fault. some of y'all in here tonight you ain't mad with a spouse you ain't mad with a co-worker you ain't mad with a boss you ain't mad with your pastor you mad with God Because you thought, because some preacher told you, that if you just started speaking in tongues or threw some money on an altar, that some kind of way God's sovereignty is impotent against your machinations.

25:54 That if you just started shouting when the praises go up, the blessings come down, and you shouted and went back home and the blessing ain't there and the burden is still living and you're mad tonight but naomi refuses to pretend and i know the bible says in all things give thanks bless the lord at all times but when life knocks the hell out of you and it comes out of nowhere and catches you off guard all them little scriptures that sound good while nothing is going on see y'all ain't trying to keep it real tonight all them little scriptures that sound good when there's somebody else going through it for some reason they just don't seem to fit right down through in here I know I'm supposed to name it.

26:49 I know I'm supposed to quote it. I know I'm supposed to declare it. But when you have to say it wasn't supposed to be like this, it wasn't supposed to turn out like this, I didn't sign up for this. I didn't plan for this. Where did this come from? Life hits you with stuff, and sometimes you try to do the right thing. You try to live the right way. You try to be holy. You try to pray about it, and it still got jacked up. You added up your time. You added up your time. You added up your faithfulness. And how many years you've been celibate and you still ran into a fool. God, I don't feel like this right now. Look at your neighbor and tell them, stop pretending.

27:46 See how quiet y'all are? Y'all don't know. Y'all don't want to get delivered. Look at your neighbor and tell them, you ain't got the fake around me. Tell them, stop pretending. I got the Kleenex if you need them. I'll rub your back if you need it. Stop pretending. But here's the shout. Go through knowing you're going to get through. Y'all ain't happy. I'll come back to y'all later. I said go through knowing you're going to get through. Y'all ain't happy either. I'll go all the way over there. Go through knowing you're going to get through. Come on, grab your neighbor's hand real quick. I ain't got but one more. Grab your neighbor. Look them dead in the face and tell them, neighbor, I don't know what you're going through. I don't know how long you've been going through it. I don't know what they did to you.

28:40 But if you walk by faith and not by sight, the God you serve told me to tell you, go through knowing you'll get. Can I prove it to you in the text? Can I prove it to you in the text? I am done.

29:03 This is all I came to tell y'all. It's this last thing. That there's a testimony in your adversity. Here's how I know you're going to get through it. Marcus, when I read this in the New International Version, I ain't going to lie. I hollered. Because I wrote this in a bitter season. I wrote this sermon right after my last surgery. I've been coming here long enough. Y'all know I've been through spinal fusion, prostate cancer, vocal paralysis, doctor telling me I wouldn't make it, knee replacement, and I ain't even 55. And then all of a sudden again last year, God put me through something else. Regina, I'm trying to figure out what the hell.

30:02 It's going on. And I was bitter. I ain't want to preach no more. Truth of the matter is, I ain't even want to go to church no more. I stopped listening to church music. I started listening to gangster rap with all the cuss words in them. See, y'all can't handle a preacher's transparency.

30:37 I felt like going back to smoking weed because I did it good. I felt like going back to drinking Cuddy's salt because I did it good. See, I cried some of y'all done. I was mad and done. So God helped me write this sermon. And I saw this in the New International Version. And when I saw what Naomi said, and she didn't even realize, What she said, and if y'all get this, church is over. She said it in verse 21, but she said it running past it, but she missed what she said. Here it is, five words. The Lord brought me back.

31:16 If you ain't going to get your shout, I can't help you. Look at it one more time. She said, the Lord brought me back. Hey, real quick, I want you to think of the lowest situation of your life. Think of one of the worst things you've been through. Think of the worst betrayal you've had. Think of the most wack person you dated. The most jacked up person that was in your life. Now ask yourself this question. What if God had left you back there?

31:52 But you need to throw your head back and just scream, the Lord brought me. Y'all ain't ready for me tonight I ain't got to find my way back The Lord brought me back. I want you to go to three people and tell them the Lord brought me back. me back. I didn't think I'd make it after that divorce. I didn't think I'd make it after that scandal. I didn't think I'd make it after that sickness. But the only reason I'm here tonight is because the law. brought me back. And the only way he could bring me back is because he brought me through. Through many days, toils and snares, I have already come shake somebody's hand telling he brought me back because he brought me through.

32:47 As bad as it was, the Lord brought me back. As rough as it was, The Lord brought me back As tough as it was The Lord brought me back As mean as it seemed The Lord brought me back Do I have any testimonies Who can say I'm done being bitter Because God brought me back I'm done being nasty Because the Lord brought me back Now hold on before you shout She came back with less than she left with. She left with her husband. She left with two sons. But she comes back with less than she left with. See, some of y'all don't know how to shout because you're too busy counting what you lost.

33:44 But you ought to be rejoicing that the one thing you didn't lose, you didn't lose you. You can stay back there, baby. but I still got me. I ain't got to worry about you. I may have lost my house. I may have lost my car. I may have lost my job. I may have lost my friends, but the Lord brought me back and he didn't bring me back empty-handed. See, you can get so bitter that you don't even know the blessings you got. See, talking about the Lord brought me back empty-handed. That ain't true, Naomi. He brought you back with Ruth. So you ain't got everything you had, but at least you got something. I'm looking for the real folk tonight who can say I ain't got everything I used to have. But God didn't let it all fall apart.

34:40 He left me with something. When the refrigerator broke, I still had gas. When the car broke down, I still had groceries. When my child was crazy, I still had a job. I want you to high five five people And tell them I ain't got what I used to have But he didn't bring me back empty handed I still got some I can praise God for