"God Says Otherwise" MIT · Leilani Linton-Williamson

34:53 He's turning things in my favor. He guarantees that my former shall not be greater than my latter. He tells me that I am his own. And because he does, I can say thank you, God. We're grateful. Thank you, Lord, for your peace. Thank you, Lord, for your grace. Thank you, Lord, for your kindness.

35:13 Thank you, God, for your mercy. God, we thank you. We thank you this morning. we thank you that somebody came in here this morning wondering how things were going to turn in their favor and they just got their message they may not know how but they know you so things will turn around god we thank you that you have brought us here one more time to worship you to praise you to glorify you god we thank you that you are god we thank you we thank you we love you we praise you and we magnify you because you are worthy. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Amen. Fellowship, it is a blessing and an honor to be up here once more to share the word. I just want to express some gratitude for our pastor for first entrusting me with this opportunity, but also for being the leader that he is. I also want to shout out Lady Bree for all that she does, her leadership and mentorship. I'm grateful for her. And I also want to shout out our pastoral staff, Pastor Pope, Pastor Vassar, and Pastor Jill. We thank you guys for all the work you do to keep the ship afloat. And so we say thank you. I also have some friends and family in the room.

36:46 Again, that's Ezekiel chapter 18 verses 20 through 24, 23, excuse me, and we'll be reading from the New Revised Standard Version. And it reads, the person who sins shall die. A child shall not suffer for the iniquity of a parent, nor a parent suffer for the iniquity of a child. The righteousness of the righteous shall be their own, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be their own. But if the wicked turn away from all their sins that they have committed, and keep all my statutes, and do what is lawful and right, they shall surely live. They shall not die. None of the transgressions they have committed shall be remembered against them, for the righteousness that they have done shall live. Have I any pleasure in the death of the wicked, says the Lord God, and not rather that they should turn from their ways and live?

37:47 This is the word of God for the people of God. Thanks be to God. Amen. You may be seated in the presence of the Lord. As you all may or may not have heard in the introduction, I am in graduate school getting my Master of Divinity. Yes, yes, thank you. Something to celebrate, but something that also we got to pray for, amen? Yes, so this summer, I made a commitment to myself to spend every minute of my free time enjoying it. I've been reading books, binge-watching shows, and if I'm honest, I've probably been spending a little bit too much time on social media. But, however, a few weeks ago I noticed a reoccurring theme between what I was reading, watching, and scrolling through. The term generational curse has almost become a buzz phrase, hot topic, and part of our daily vernacular. On social media, there's a think piece every which way you look.

38:44 And it seems that generational curses are a topic that everyone wants to give their two cents on. Talking about the weight of being the one to break your family's curse, how to break the generational curse in the first place, and even how to set boundaries with family members living under said curse. There are millions of TikToks, reels, substacks, threads, and Facebook posts all about generational curses. I even found this theme in one of the books I'm reading this summer, The Seven Daughters of Dupree by Nikesha Elise Williams. This tells the story of a lineage of black women who, in the words of the publisher, are bound by a mysterious malediction Malediction just being another word for curse The book goes on to tell the story of the pain and resilience of this family of women who believe they are carrying a generational curse And in some stories and shows, even when the term generational curse is not explicitly stated, it's implied I recently started binge-watching Power for the first time, and I just finished book two, and if you know, you know.

39:50 If you don't, don't judge me. Ghost is the continuation of Power with the focus on the son of Power's main character. Tariq St. Patrick, who wanted nothing to be like his father, was told time and time and time again that he was just like him. And eventually, he inherits his father's street name, Ghost. As you can see, this concept of generational curses is saturated throughout our culture, especially within the black community and the black church. I, on the other hand, have always felt some sort of resistance to the term generational curse. It's not that I don't understand what's being said or why it's being said. I know firsthand that it can feel like a curse when you look at your family and see repeated cycles of alcoholism, illness, abuse, incarceration, poverty, instability, and dysfunctional relationships. And it can feel like a curse when you feel like you're living, carrying the weight of something you never even asked for and the responsibility of stopping it from affecting you.

40:53 I understand why we have become so hung up on breaking generational curses, especially considering there are multiple other areas in the Bible where scriptures suggest that God will curse generations for sin of the parents. It's in the Ten Commandments that we hear so often repeated and drilled into our memories, especially as children. In Exodus chapter 20 verse 5, it says that God will punish children for any sin that their parents pass down to them through generations. This verse, alongside others, has been used time and time again by evangelical Christians as a means of controlling generations of people and discouraging them from living a life of sin. It has even been used to evoke shame on those who are living under the so-called curse. This verse, however, is not meant to say that God will punish children for moral failures that had nothing to do with them. This is God's warning that our actions matter.

41:54 Living a life outside of God's will can be passed down generations through the children's learned behavior. Our children look to us as their first models. What they see, they often repeat without even knowing what they're doing. I'm reminded of the example of babies when you take a drink and you say, ah, and they mimic you, something like that. Or when you're talking and you say something, and this happens to me all the time. We hear ourselves talking and we just say, ooh, I sound just like my mama. Just as we repeat these harmless learned behaviors throughout our lives, we can also repeat behaviors of substance abuse, emotional suppression and dysregulation, poor spending habits, addiction, and more. This perspective, this understanding of this scripture can help us understand what this phenomenon we call a generational curse actually is. This implication of a curse is that one is bound to negative, harmful experiences Often in response to something that they've done Claiming generational curses over you and your family's lives Is an understandable response to the trials and tribulations of life Especially when trying to make sense of your suffering Some even go as far as to say that God or some demonic force is the one cursing them I believe using the term curse in and of itself might subconsciously do more harm than we know.

43:15 And if I may, I'd like to offer a countercultural but spirit-led perspective this afternoon. God says otherwise. I know you're probably asking, well, Leigh, how you know that? Well, I spent a lot of time talking with God in preparation for this sermon, asking questions like, God, how can you be so good and families still be cursed? How is it that you can be faithful and merciful and loving and kind if they say that you curse generations for sins that they didn't even commit? I had to get real with God and I had to ask him what was really going on in this text. And so as I listened, the Holy Spirit led me to Ezekiel 18. And if you walk with me through this text this afternoon, I believe you'll discover how to free yourself from the fallacy, the lie of generational curses. In Ezekiel 18, the prophet Ezekiel shares a word from the Lord about individual justice in response to a frequently repeated Israelite proverb. Verses 1 through 4 read as follow.

44:19 The word of the Lord came to me. What do you mean by repeating this proverb concerning the land of Israel? The parents have eaten sour grapes and the children's teeth are set on edge. As I live, says the Lord God, this proverb shall be no more used by you in Israel. Know that all lives are mine. The life of the parent as well as the life of the child is mine. It is only and only the person who sins that shall die. God comes out the gate swinging, making it very clear that the consequence of a sin belongs to the person who committed it. This shows us there is no such thing as a generational curse. So often when we allow ourselves to believe that generational curses run through our bloodlines, we reaffirm our belief that we are being punished and it begins to affect our lives. Believing that you are living through a generational curse slowly impacts your mindset and can become something we move in spite of, unknowingly causing detriment to our own lives. When this happens, we work so hard not to become what we believe our parents and families are that we either hinder ourselves from reaching our fullest potential because we spent all our time avoiding a specific outcome that was never guaranteed to us in the first place, or we become complacent with the ways that we have been accustomed to and the habits we've picked up and we live lives reminiscent of the models that we've seen.

45:43 When we look at the media and the world around us, these two outcomes become almost tropes for people and families who believe that they are cursed, which can be seen in both power and the seven daughters of Dupree. But as you continue to read this chapter, you read the story of three generations who further illustrate God's point about individual moral accountability. Verse five speaks of a righteous man who shall surely live. Verse 10 refers to his son who was violent and sins even though his father doesn't. And God concludes that he shall die in his blood. That's on him. Verse 14 then refers to the grandson who saw the sins of the father and chose not to do the same. And God declares that he shall surely live. If we jump to verse 20 through 23, we can catch the entire premise of Ezekiel's prophecy. We've read the New Revised Standard Version earlier in the message, but I like the way the Message Bible puts it.

46:43 Do you need to ask, so why does the child not share the guilt of the parent? Isn't it plain? It's because the child did what is fair and right. Since the child was careful to do what is lawful and right, the child will truly live well. The soul that sins is the soul that dies. The child does not share the guilt of the parent, nor the parent the guilt of the child. If you live upright and well, you get the credit If you live a wicked life, you're guilty as charged But a wicked person who turns his back on that life of sin And keeps all my statutes living a just, righteous life He'll live, he'll really live, he won't die I won't keep a list of all the things he did wrong He will live Do you think I take any pleasure in the death of wicked men and women? Isn't it my pleasure that they turn around no longer living wrong, but living right? Really? Living?

47:41 I know somebody came in the sanctuary this afternoon carrying fear, carrying doubt, carrying uncertainty, carrying depression, carrying anxiety, and the weight, probably the weight of where you're placed in your family's lineage. But God sent me here today on divine assignment to set someone free. If you leave this sermon with nothing else, So if I could sum it up into just one sentence for you, I would say that Ezekiel 18 goes to show that there is nothing your family has done or you can do to separate you from the grace of God. And this is not only affirmed in Ezekiel 18, Jeremiah 31 verses 29 through 34 echo the same exact sentiments shared by Ezekiel in reference to the same Israelite proverb. You are accountable for your own sin. But Jeremiah gives us another word from God in these verses. Under the new covenant, God will be near to us and walk with us as we transform our hearts and our lives.

48:40 God says that there will be no memory of the sins you've committed. And I know you're probably thinking, well, what does this have to do with unlearning and dismantling the fallacy of generational curses? You're telling me I'm accountable for my sin. It doesn't really make me feel better. And to be honest, I felt the same way when the Lord told me to preach this word. I began to sit with the text, and I realized, though, that Ezekiel 18 doesn't just tell us that we are not cursed. It shows us what we can do with that truth. And I believe there are four crucial moves that we can make so that we are not consumed by the lie that we are cursed.

49:18 First, we can reflect on what we say, do, and believe to relieve ourselves from the burden of misconception. The chapter starts with God telling Israel to stop using the saying, the parents have eaten sour grapes and the children's teeth were set on edge. This was their version of the apple doesn't fall far from the tree or like mother, like daughter or the sins of the father. And I believe God rejected that old proverb for two reasons. One, it doesn't reflect who God is. And two, it plants a negative belief about your life before you've even lived it.

49:54 Labeling generational trauma, a generational curse takes away your agency and villainizes the people you claim are under said curse. If you believe you're under a generational curse, you probably spend your time pointing fingers trying to place blame and you forget that God, with God, you can co-create the life you desire for yourself. The things we say about ourselves and others matter. What we say, we think. What we think, we believe. What we believe, we become. This is why we have to stop saying things like she or he is payback for what you did as a child to parents in reference to their children or the sins of the father because that had nothing to do with that child. Or you're going to end up just like so and so when God has given me my own destiny. Words have power. Death and life lies in the power of your own tongue and that's Bible.

50:47 We have to reflect on the things that we speak and how they impact our perception of our lives and God. We can't believe God is just and say that we are cursed. No man can curse what God has blessed. And that is a function of God's love, justice, grace, and mercy for his children in action. This is the same God who knew you before you were formed in your mother's womb. The same God we refer to when we say, now unto him who is able to keep you from falling. This is the same God who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all we could ask or think. I'm talking about the God who woke you up this morning and got you to the sanctuary and the virtual ship. I'm talking about the God who helped you pay that bill. The God who carried you through last semester. The God who held you through your divorce. The God who healed your body.

51:39 The God who delivered you from that depressive episode. The God who walked with you through your grief. There's somebody in the church this afternoon who needs to wake up, look back, and reflect, and remember who God is. One of my mentors in undergrad used to tell me, we can feel what we need to feel, but we always have to remember what we know. And I encourage you to do the same. Reflecting on what you feel while remembering what you know allows you to reframe your perspective. Reflection means nothing if there's no action after it.

52:17 The second thing we learn to do is reframe our perspective. The context of today's content gives us insight into why the Israelites believed they were cursed. At the time, the Israelites were exiled to Babylon, a condition they knew all too well. Generations of Israelites had faced this same oppression, so it makes sense that they believed that they were cursed, especially considering they also believed these conditions were a result of sin and permitted by God. I think we as black people can uniquely relate to the Israelites and their beliefs. Our ancestors were enslaved and brought to a foreign land After that we faced Jim and Jane Crow And today we are still left feeling the lingering effects of navigating a society That was never built for our survival in the first place We've lived through segregation and redlining and police brutality And mass incarceration, the war on drugs And now we still gotta sit through two more years of a racist, sexist, classic Xenophobic, homophobic, and transphobic administration It only makes sense that this level of trauma would have lasting effects.

53:25 Much like the Israelites, we as black people have come to understand the harsh reality of living in exile for generations and the pain and trauma that comes with it. When we use the phrase generational curse, we are much like the Israelites using it to make sense of our suffering. When we take into consideration, we realize, when we take this into consideration, we realize what we have been naming as generational curses is actually evidence of intergenerational trauma. Psychologists define intergenerational trauma as the transmission of trauma between generations of a family through behavior or epigenetics. In other words, traumatic experiences change the way we show up in the world and our physiology. Intergenerational trauma can manifest as chronic anxiety, depression, reactivity, unhealthy attachment styles, substance abuse, and even chronic pain and illness What we have called a curse can better be understood as the residue of trauma, environment, family patterns, and systems This can be seen in the auntie who never talked about or got help for what happened to her So she raised her kids in the best way she knew how because survival didn't leave room for softness We're talking about the father who was never taught to express his feelings creating emotional distance between him and his children Because he was taught that being expressive makes him less of a man We're talking about the single mother who had to work three jobs to stay afloat and come home comes home every day drained with nothing left to give We're talking about the cousin who has distanced themselves from the family because of the homophobia that is taught and reinforced in the family These are not curses. This is what happens when trauma goes untreated.

55:14 But here's what you really need to know. Predisposition is not predestination. Trauma can be healed. God has given us free will, and when we are aware of the cycles of harm, we have the opportunity to make better choices for ourselves. This should also change the way we see our families. Understanding intergenerational trauma doesn't excuse the harm that was done, but it can help us see our families with more compassion. We can understand them as people who are also affected by histories and systems. Some of the things our parents passed down, they were unknowingly carrying themselves. Some of the things they taught us, they were taught, and that doesn't make the harm right, but it helps us understand that we are not the only ones who have been affected by what was passed down. Ezekiel 18 also requires us to reframe how we understand sin. I personally am not here to tell you what to do or what not to do, nor am I here to shame you for the choices you've made. I'm not here to tell you how to get to heaven or to condemn you to hell, but I am here to offer a liberatory perspective. Sin is not simply a list of things we are not allowed to do. Sin is what happens when we participate in interpersonal and structural harm. When we violate the dignity of another person, when we exploit or oppress or abuse or deceive or take something from someone that God intended for them to have. When we talk about what has been passed down through our families, we don't have to call it a curse. Sometimes what has been passed down is the consequence of someone's choices. Sometimes it is trauma. Sometimes it is survival. Sometimes it is the result of systems that were designed to harm us. And sometimes, yes, it is even our own behavior that has caused real harm and needs to be confronted.

57:12 But understanding where something came from doesn't mean that we have to excuse it. And recognizing harm doesn't mean that we have to carry it. After we reflect, we can reframe. And after we reframe, we can, after we reframe our understanding of what we've heard, we can release the fear, shame, and guilt attached to it. God through Ezekiel has already told us the child shall not suffer for the iniquity of the parent, nor the parent suffer for the iniquity of the child. If there are harmful cycles running through your family, God is reminding you that this is not your burden to carry. It is not your fault that your parent made choices that hurt you, and it's not your fault that your child made choices that you don't agree with. Ezekiel gives us an opportunity to free ourselves from guilt and shame. When we are made to believe that we are under a generational curse, we begin to feel guilty and it develops into shame. Shame is a silent killer and it makes you doubt your God-given identity. Shame keeps you stuck in the same place, telling the same story about yourself and expecting the same outcome. Some of us spend our whole lives living in fear that we will become what we have seen. This leaves no room for vision. This leaves no room for sight.

58:31 This leaves no room for hope of what our lives could be like outside of what we've seen. Holding on to shame leaves us feeling bound and limited from reaching our full potential. But each one of us is a new thought from God with a unique purpose and plan. And as long as we live in shame, we prolong it from coming into fruition. In many cases, the shame starts the moment we start calling intergenerational trauma a generational curse. To call it a curse is to place a ceiling on your potential. To call it a curse is to diminish the efforts and prayers of our ancestors, the ones who prayed for us to be in rooms they never even got to walk in. They didn't labor and believe God for us to play small. So it's time for you to release it. Release the guilt that never belonged to you in the first place. Release the shame that's convinced you something is wrong with you because of something that took place before you were even born. Release the ceiling that you have placed on your own life.

59:31 Release, however, isn't the end. Release is what makes room for you to start over. The final thing Ezekiel teaches us is that after you've reflected and reframed and released, you have the opportunity to restart. In verses 21 through 23, God says, But a wicked person who turns his back on that life of sin and keeps all my statutes living a just and righteous life, he'll live, really live. He won't die. I won't keep a list of all the things he did wrong. He will live. Do you think I take any pleasure in the death of wicked men and women? Isn't it my pleasure that they turn around, no longer living wrong, but living right? God keeps driving this point home. God wants to give us life. God wants to give us a future. These verses go to show that God's grace abounds. Nothing your family has done or experienced can disqualify you from this grace. Nothing you can do or have done can disqualify you from God's love.

1:00:36 God keeps no record of wrongs. Restarting doesn't mean starting from square one. It means that you're starting from a place of truth. It means that you've let go of the lies you've been told and the mistakes you've made. Restarting means you're ready to interrupt a pattern, a habit, a theme you see playing out in your life, and God encourages you to do so. As I close, I'm reminded of one of my favorite poems that I'm sure you all are familiar with, Won't You Celebrate With Me by Lucille Clifton. We so often get hung up and on the shout of the ending of the poem that I think we missed the beginning, which is very reminiscent of today's text. Lucille Clifton writes, won't you celebrate with me what I have shaped into a kind of life? I had no model. Born in Babylon, both non-white and woman, what did I see to be except myself? Born into exile as a black woman, Clifton had no model, and she still shaped a kind of life. And because she did, this is where we shout, everything that tried to kill her failed. That's the invitation sitting in front of you right now.

1:01:45 You don't need to see it modeled first to live it out. You just need to know whose you are and start walking into your life and your liberation. The only thing you have left to do is to walk in it. This summer, one phrase followed me everywhere in my books, in my shows, in my timeline, generational curse and I truly understand why it's everywhere when you look at your family and see the same pattern repeat it can feel like a curse but hear me clearly one final time acknowledging generational curses are a fallacy does not mean that I'm telling you your pain is not real your trauma is real but what is not real is the lie that you were cursed by God or damned by your bloodline or written off before you even took your first breath Ezekiel told us the child will not suffer for the sin of the parent nor the parent for the sin of the child Jeremiah told us God is writing something new on your heart And today I'll try to show you what to do with that truth Reflect on what you say, do and believe Reframe what you've been calling a curse and see it for what it really is Release the guilt and shame that were never yours to carry And restart not from level zero but from truth Thank you.

1:03:01 Before you leave this afternoon, I need you to hear just one more thing. Not everything that you inherit is something that you need to free yourself from. Not everything is a curse that you need to break. Some of the things that your ancestors passed down to you are gifts, your grandmother's faith, your mother's strength, the prayers that were prayed before you even had a name. In the words of Maya Angelou, bringing the gifts that my ancestor gave, I am the dream and the hope of the slave, and I rise. You are not cursed. You are not your family's worst chapter. You are not what you have written yourself off as. You are the dream your ancestors prayed for. The world may keep calling it a curse. Your family may call it a curse. Even you may have believed it was a curse. But God says otherwise.