Devotion in Motion | Love, Actually | Julia Veach

0:00 Hey, everyone. I want to welcome you. Thank you so much for joining us today here at Zoe Church. This is not Chad. This is Julia. And I am so excited to be sharing the word today. We just want to thank you. If you are someone that gives and partners with us in the area of giving, we're just so grateful for your sacrifice in the area of giving. If you want to partner with us, you can check out more information about that on our website. But today, we are talking about love in action. The title of this talk today is Devotion in Motion. I am so excited to jump into this message. I hope that this helps you in your relationships, and we love you so much. Let's check this out.

0:52 Today, I want to talk about love in action. and I don't know if you're like me, but I love practical ways to walk out or to act out what we say. I think Jesus modeled that for us. I am convinced that the Bible is filled with stories that show us what it looks like to live out love in action. And I'm excited to share with you guys today. I am not a psychologist. I am not a love expert. In fact, I would pick a war movie or a Western over a rom-com. Yeah, where's my violence people at? Just kidding, don't raise your hand. But my job today is exciting because I get to point you to the word of God.

1:49 And I get to show you what God gives us as a way to live out love in action. So maybe this will lead you. Maybe this will encourage you. Maybe this will challenge you. Maybe this will even prompt you to think of someone that's sitting next to you who might need it. and maybe you're like this church says amen a lot and I don't say amen a lot a lot but maybe you can text the spouse next to you amen when I say something that resonates pro tip it's not going to benefit your relationship but uh or improve anything but I'm excited because maybe this might come as a shock or surprise to you uh but your pastors uh my husband Chad and I were not in a perfect relationship. There you go. That is what I was looking for. The first service laughed and I was like, I really wanted some more shock there. Well, I mean, we're two pretty perfect people.

2:56 No, we're two flawed individuals. We're two imperfect human beings, but we are committed to one another, and we're committed to becoming better, and we have access to a perfect Savior. And we invite him to be the cornerstone of our home and of our relationship. And I encourage you today, if you haven't put Christ in the center of your commitment, your foundation is going to crumble. Christ is the one that we build our house and our relationships on. Okay, so my prayer for you today is in the next 20-something minutes, is that I can not only give you a picture of his unwavering, unyielding, undying love that he has for you, his obsession for you, that in that place you can receive and enter into a relationship with him if you've never done that, but also that I can give you some practical ways that you can walk out love in action.

4:19 So this is a very practical chat that we're going to have today, and hopefully these scriptures and hopefully these points can encourage you, both here in the room and online. So 1 John 3 verse 18 says this. I love the apostle John. He is in love with love. You know that person? yeah I have a nine-year-old he's in love with love and uh we always say like I'm like nervous that he's gonna get married at 17 you know like he's just like such an empathetic like loving heart you know I'm like honey like I know that she beat cancer and she's got a sleeve tattoo but like that's not the the one that God has for you but he just like loves love and like loves everyone and it's a beautiful thing. But the Apostle John's a little bit like that.

5:12 He's a feeler. He loves love. So he has a lot of content in scriptures on relationship and love if you want to read through that book to help guide you. But it says, Dear children, let us not love with words or speech, but with actions. Everyone say actions. And in truth. The audience here is followers and believers, like many of us today, and he's sharing in God's life, his own life, and love by devoting themselves as believers and followers of Jesus to love one another. I love that the Greek word here for action is ergos, which means indeed and in work. I don't know if you're like me, but I love the work. I love the action.

6:06 Eugene Peterson's translation, The Message, uses this way to frame it. It says, let's not just talk about love. Let's practice love. Let's practice loving one another as Christ loved us. I don't know if you're familiar with the book. if you Google or go into chat GPT and say top three books on love and relationship, this very popular book called The Love Languages would come up. Now, I know that many of you are familiar with that, but just for context, there's five main love languages. Now, I know that there's more than that because my sixth love language is working out with my spouse. You know, like, is that so much to ask? But, you know, there's the concept of physical touch and quality time and acts of service and words of affirmation and gifts. And the author writes so that we can identify and understand what our significant other loves to give and to receive and how we can be in a relationship where we're actually learning how to speak each other's languages. Now, I've been married a while. I understand that my husband loves to be touched and told how great he is and then touched again. You know, it's, you know, I understand his language. He also knows that my love language is taking the trash out and somehow understanding exactly what I'm thinking without me having to communicate it to him. I'm like, is a mind reader so much to ask? I don't know.

7:48 No, I think that the author wrote this book with the intent that we wouldn't just learn how to understand someone else's language of love, but we would learn how to practice it. We would learn how to do it. We would learn not just how to talk about it. You know, I love that we're at social gatherings and we all talk about what our love languages are or Enneagrams are or what our triggers are or what fill in the blank. But what about doing it? What about acting it out? And I love that John is saying, let's just do it practically. And I am of the belief that practical love in real ways can connect us more to the people that God puts in our lives. now this may come as a surprise to you but in our society and our culture today we have a decline or a decrease in practical ways that we show up for one another if you don't believe me just ask anyone the next time you need a ride to the los angeles airport just see what their response is, you know?

9:20 When I was a kid, my parents were like, we're helping move this family this weekend. I pushed like mattresses up the stairs. I'm like, now people are like, can you help me move? You have a truck. I'm like, oh, I don't know about that. But I was researching different statistics in ways where our culture and our society today has decreased in practical ways of showing and looking like love to one another. It says in a research center in 2022, it determined that 57% of Americans know very few of their neighbors. 23% of Americans do not know any of their neighbors. We're failing Mr. Rogers right now here. Charities reported that financial contributions to nonprofits have risen, so there's bigger donations. I think people are obviously making more money and understanding that a charitable donation is necessary for their write-offs, but the number of American donors has significantly decreased, and the number of volunteers to charitable donations have significantly decreased in the last two decades. Churches, how about churches? Churches not only here in Los Angeles, but across America have decreased. There's fewer people that serve in church, fewer people that are committed to attend regularly in church. Now, this is like by no means trying to like make you feel guilty, but if you do want to sign up for our serve team, growth track is happening after the 12, 15 p.m. service. Okay.

11:20 All that to say is that from charitable donations to churches to neighbors to helping people move, there is a decrease in showing up for people. You know, I grew up in the 80s, and when you drove by someone on the side of the road, you'd pull over. Now, I don't condone that, especially if you're a single young girl. There could be a safety issue to that. But I do think that we are so focused on me. Where do I need to go? How do I need to leverage? What do I need to build? And there's a we concept that John is addressing in this passage that he's saying we as fellow, I love that word, fellow believers, as fellow followers of Christ, that we are in this together.

12:22 He even says in that scripture passage, let us, like I am on the team, let us as the team work together in showing love and action. I've titled this thought and this talk devotion in motion. Now it might be a little cheesy. Chad's the rapper here. But you know, devotion in motion is the best picture that I could show of how we as Christ followers need to show our commitment and devotion to one another by walking out the practical ways that God has called us to. When it comes down to doing the work in a relationship, it's simply that. It's work. And it can be challenging, especially when someone that you're in a relationship, someone that you love has hurt you. It's hard to put in the work. It's hard to choose we. It's hard to think about the team because it's so much easier to sulk and to isolate and to live in frustration.

13:45 But I don't know about you, but I signed up for a life of abundance and fullness and contentment, and I want to follow the way that Jesus has modeled for us. There is a Harvard study that they did over decades in the 1930s. Well, sorry, that statement doesn't make sense. They did over decades starting in the 1930s. There we go.

14:16 And to answer the age-old question, how can I be happy? I think that everyone here can resonate with wanting to know the answer to how to live a life of happiness, how to feel content, how to be fulfilled. And the research that was provided was that, it wouldn't be a surprise, is that it's a person that has fulfilling and meaningful relationships.

14:50 And I think that if it's important to God, it should be important to us. And yet it's hard to do the work. It's hard to show up in practical ways when life gets full and busy and you get discouraged or frustrated. In this passage, John is speaking to believers and when the apostles speak to an audience of believers, the intent there is that they would hope that the audience would mature. They would hope that who they're speaking to would grasp Jesus' words and Jesus' model as an anchor or as an aid to help in their maturation process as a Jesus follower. And I think in our relationships, active love is not just a grand gesture.

15:50 It's about living out the love of God in our everyday actions. That's what being a mature Christian looks like. It's about showing love in practical ways just as Jesus did, but we do it today. Amen? Just a few ways that I wrote down that I want to talk about in ways that we can practically love and how we can show up in our commitment and our devotion to one another in motion. Devotion. In motion. In the ocean. Okay, that's fine. We got this. The first one is sacrifice. No surprise that relationships require sacrifice. Every mom said amen. I'm like, I don't know what is so urgent that you have to break down my door while I'm showering right now. um but you know I'm just I it's like we we sacrifice time but us moms we set we sacrifice personal space too you know like I'm like travel with a toddler on your lap and you'll like never be so thrilled to have like 15 minutes of like just like a breeze on yourself again but I think maybe for you it's giving up personal time maybe for you sacrifice looks like I don't know letting your husband chase a little white ball for seven hours no I'm not taking shots he's not here to defend himself love you honey but I think that if we're being honest, sacrifice for us looks like an exchange of something we can get in return. You know, I'll do this for you, then I think you're going to do this for me.

17:46 Chad and I have this saying that like nothing in life is free. If you think it's free, there is an exchange of some point somewhere. You know, when Chad all of a sudden starts like picking up the house very motivated um i'm like hmm are you wanting some type of practical action from me um yeah some of you just getting that but Sure, there's things where we exchange for a better outcome, where we sacrifice like eating unhealthy foods because the exchange is that it's better for our heart health or better for our energy or our emotions. Discipline is really that. I exchange the comfort of sleeping all day so I can be productive with my time.

18:43 There is a great exchange that happens when we give up something or we sacrifice something for the betterment of the outcome. But I want to encourage us to evaluate the tit-for-tat in relationships mentality. If I do this, you do that. Because that is not the model of great sacrificial love and sacrifice that Jesus gave to us. I love that earlier in this chapter, in 1 John 3.16, it says this. It explains the why. It says, this is how we've come to understand and experience love. Christ sacrificed his life for us. This is why we ought to live sacrificially for our fellow believers.

19:40 And not just be out for ourselves. But we need to remind ourselves of his sacrifice. And sometimes we don't just lose our why, but we lose our who. Or the what. but most importantly the who and the people that God have placed into our lives as a gift. Galatians 5.13 says, For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh. Don't just say it's my time and my freedom and my way and my thing and my life. but through love serve one another. We all know that the attempt of selfishness can impact a relationship.

20:40 John 15 says, Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. What a picture of sacrificial love. that someone would be willing to serve to the extent of giving up their time and their energy and their life and their being for friendships and for covenant relationships. Our call and our example is to put others' needs as a priority in our lives. The second thing is security. Yes, feeling safe and secure builds trust and strengthens the bond between relationships and the bond between two individuals.

21:38 But having security within yourself is such an important part of being in a healthy relationship. having security in you, knowing who you are, knowing whose you are. Have that security in yourself is vital for any relationship to flourish. I love how Paul says this in 1 Corinthians. He says, Nevertheless, each person should live as a believer in whatever situation, there's a word, The Lord has assigned to them just as God has called them. This is the rule I lay down for all the churches.

22:28 Translation, be confident in where God has you at today. Be confident and secure in the season that he's called you at today. Turn to someone and say, you're in a situation. Turn to someone else and say, but you're not a situation. Paul's like, single, it's a situation. Married, situation, engaged, that's a situation. Dating, situation. It's a situation. Every season that you're in, you need the ability to have confidence that God has put the same spirit in you and the same strength in you to endure every single season that he allows us to walk through.

23:37 Where you are at right now, it does not matter where you're at, who you're at, or how bad the situation is. You can make a difference. you can be used by God. Marriage doesn't fix anything. All the married people said amen. Just puts a ring on the situation. Just exposes and puts a flashlight on all the things. Just brings them to the forefront. So if you're single and you're like, if I only could, no be confident in where god has you today be secure third one help me jesus i gotta get through this faster is support we need each other we need support i love in genesis 2 it says that the lord god said it is not good for man to be alone so i will make a helper what's that word helper suitable for him. So he made Eve and he brought a helper to Adam. Helper is a Hebrew word there that is not only translated as helper, but also as rescuer. You see it 21 times in the Old Testament and it's meant to say we need help. We need rescuing. We need support. We are flawed, imperfect people and I know that Alfred thinks that Chad and I's relationship is perfect by the one shocking gasp in the entire church but we need support and it takes courage to say oh I actually could use some support right now it commitment lasts longer in the context and the confines of community. We say this saying, we turn these rows into circles in our connect groups.

25:42 But let me just tell you, sometimes you need to get into a place of vulnerability and trust and say, would you pray for me? I actually could use some support right now, and I'm not strong enough on my own legs right now, so would you walk alongside me? Can I shoulder this weight on you just a little bit. I need support. The best version of us is the whole version of us. It's the healthy, whole version of ourselves that we can give to every relationship. And love is just, it's just better given from a whole and healthy place or person. It's so much more fun in that place. And in order to do that, sometimes we need help, rescuing, and support. Our foundational makeup is to support one another because God created us from dirt as helpers in relationship, but we lose sight of giving our time to help and to support one another because we get so busy and focused on what we need.

27:03 I love in John 15 when Jesus talks about producing fruit and bearing fruit. And if you're like me, like productivity is like my drug of choice. Like just, you know, self-care for me is not a massage or a face mask. It's organizing a closet. So maybe this is not your love language, but I love to get things done. And sometimes I'm like, God, when I'm not producing and when I get into my 40s and the energy is just not where it used to be and there's a lot of kids with a lot of needs, and there's a lot of sacrificial love going on, and I can't accomplish all the things that I want to do, I have these conversations with God, and I'm like, God, I just want to be used. I just want to produce. I just want to do things. I just want to accomplish things. And he'll bring me back to this picture of where he talks about in John 15 about just remaining in him and being connected to him. And it says that it says repeatedly remain in me, stay put and connected. Remaining is a connection picture where we are connected to Christ and out of that place of relationship and intimacy with our Savior, He produces grapefruit out of us.

28:32 See how it's written here? It says, remain in me as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself, by my striving, by my trying. It must remain in the vine, connected and supported by a root system of something that is stronger than us on our own. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. It's time to share with one another. It's time to have courage to say, I could use some support, and I could use some connection to someone or to a source that is stronger, that has a branch or a root system that could help bear the weight of what I'm walking through relationally. And in that place, Jesus says that we can produce good fruit because we are getting life from a support, from a source of support, and from a place that does not let us stay where we're at. He loves you so much, and he is committed to invite you into the remaining in him space.

30:06 The fourth thing is service, or I like to say hospitality here. I love hospitality. I love the picture of hospitality. I love the passage in the Bible where there's the two sisters, Mary and Martha, and Mary is like the one where the Bible is saying that, you know, she's doing the right thing, but Martha's like getting busy. She's making the charcuterie board and paying the mortgage, and Mary's just the mooch. It's like Martha's house. Like, she's doing the work, like, but I love the picture of these two sisters where it's like they're inviting Jesus into their home. And I love the way that the Bible describes service in hospitality.

30:57 And I know that many of us, we live spread out all throughout Los Angeles. And it's hard to have people over for meals. It's hard to open our doors to people because it's hard to commit to things sometimes because time is limited. But I think that serving and hospitality can look more creative than we think it can. And I think that when we serve one another, we get connected to what another is going through and what one another needs. 1 Peter 4 verse 8 through 9 worship team you can come join me it says this it says above all keep loving one another earnestly since love covers a multitude of sins show hospitality verse 9 to one another without grumbling John 13 says this. It says, A new command I give you, love one another as I have loved you, so you must love one another.

32:11 By this, everyone will know that you are my disciples if you love one another. Jesus is going away in this passage, and he's talking to his disciples, and he's saying, Take care of one another. Show hospitality to one another. Serve one another. I'm going to be gone, and I want to make sure that the world that does not know me can see me through your relationships.

32:40 So we serve one another, and we're hospitable to one another because Christ is coming back, and he's looking for a beautiful bride. And he wants his church to be filled with relationships that are flourishing and healthy and committed to serving one another.

33:09 Lastly, number five is steadfastness. What a boring but awesome word, you know? Steadfast means it's unwavering. I love this. It's dutifully firm and strong. And if you're single out there, maybe you're looking for sexy Steve, but don't rule out Steadfast Stan, you know? We also love 401k Frank and homeowner Harry. I mean, it's Los Angeles. He could be Condo Carl, you know. It doesn't have to be a home. Show me the deed and the diamond and we're good to go.

33:52 But commitment is attractive. Faithfulness is attractive. and 1 Corinthians Paul chapter 13 verse 7 it talks about you know love is patient love is kind and love does this and love looks like this and love is long-suffering if you've been in a relationship love is love is not a drug it doesn't it's it's not a feeling it's a verb it's a commitment it's an action. Love 13.7 says this. It says, love bears all things. Love believes all things. Love hopes all things. And it endures all things. Devotion is shown through steadfastness when you have to go through hard times. And you have to learn what love looks like when it's not easy, when it gets tough. It doesn't waver. It doesn't easily give up. I love that definition. It's dutifully firm and strong, remaining constant and committed and loyal through every high and through every low. I wrote down three things in how we can practically stay steadfast. One is we fail forward, meaning you don't beat yourself up. You don't harm the other person with harsh words when you've messed up. You clean up your mess. You put on those big girl pants and you have the hard conversation when you don't want to have it. Easier said than done, but go do it. Take one step backwards, but just keep stepping forward. Feel forward. Second, forgive. Forgive yourself.

36:00 Forgive others. Just forgive. Maybe it's a daily practice for you. Maybe you need to learn how to sit in prayer and pray for the person who has hurt you, but learn to forgive. Thirdly, just stay faithful to your commitments. You get those three things down. You fail, but you fail forward. You commit to becoming better. You learn how to forgive. Forgive others. forgive yourself. Find security and confidence in your season, and you stay faithful.

36:40 Steadfast Dan, he's gonna be sexy real fast, you know. I want to pray for you today. Would you stand to your feet? Maybe you're here and you would say, you know, that was a great talk. Those were some great thoughts. But I really, really have a difficult time receiving and giving love. It's very, very challenging for me for whatever reason. Maybe it's from low self-esteem. Maybe it's from trauma. I'm not a psychologist, but there are some reasons to why. Maybe you were raised in a home where there wasn't affection and it was difficult for you to receive love if it wasn't earned.

37:40 Whatever it looks like for you, I am aware that there are various stories within this room of severities that I cannot even imagine. Abandonment, traumas, situations that maybe you have committed years into working on yourself.

38:03 But remember I told you today that my job is to point you to a perfect Savior. So I want to pray today and I'm going to believe that in His presence there can be wholeness and healing and heart surgery done today. So God, you see every person that's here today.