Reflecting on The Most Searched Questions of the Year

0:02 The questions we ask can be so revealing. Yeah, our questions can show us our fears, our values, and our hopes. So as we close out 2021, we're going to take a look at the most searched how-to questions of the year. And we're going to pay special attention to what they say about what it means to be a human in the United States of America right now. I think my question of the year is a toss-up between how to live with teenage boys in my home and how to potty train a puppy. Oh, well, then my question is twofold and it's a toss up. It's how do I get better at sex and how do I have more of it? That is a great question. So we're here to reflect on the year with you. On In Good Faith. I am so excited for this conversation because I have a list that you, my love, do not have. And it just feels so powerful. It feels so good. I like the feeling.

1:11 I'm literally in the dark here and have no idea. I have heard much about this episode. In fact, our entire production team, everyone is keeping me completely in the dark. It's so fun because the list that I have is every year Google does a year in review based on the top searches, the top things that people talk about, and they compile different lists to kind of capture what humanity was thinking and going through during the past year. And one of the lists that they made this year is the top 10 how-to questions that people asked Google. So I get to read these to you one at a time and we get to have a conversation about them. You can try to answer some of them. We can reflect on humanity and what these questions say about what the year 2021 has been. Sound good? Dun, dun, dun, dun.

2:04 Okay, are you ready for the first one? Sounds so good, yeah. The first one is how to be eligible for a stimulus check. Do you know, my love? Do you know what a stimulus check is or was in 2021? I cannot believe you put me in this situation. So much fun. Finances and the details that go along with it are not my strong suit. A stimulus check, I'm sure, is aid for the difficult extended time we've been in in this country. I plead ignorance. Yes, that we got our stimulus checks. It was great. Really wonderful. We did. Yep. Wow. So you didn't have to Google how to be eligible for them. But I find it really fascinating that that was the top how-to Google search of 2021. That was the top. Yep. The top new one for the year. Which, yeah.

2:56 Because it's something that everybody experienced that was brand new. Stimulus checks had never been done before. And together as Americans, we all experienced this new phenomenon together. And we're all figuring out how to do it. And I think it says a lot about humanity. Absolutely. And the reality of security and this concept that am I going to be okay? Am I going to have resources and finances to keep living? So it makes a lot of sense. I think the good news for you is even though you may not have known a lot about question number one, Question number two, you're really getting crushed. This one you know something about. How to be more attractive? Yeah, thank you for asking. And obviously this is a little bit of my strong suit. Can you imagine?

3:37 I think security is one of the most attractive things in a human being. Someone who is confident. Someone who is content. Someone who is fully themselves. And I think that happens slowly but surely. And I will say, I'll put a little plug in. for our first of the year podcast, because we're going to talk a little bit about that and some new habits and stuff you can form that I think will speak to helping you become more attractive. It's so funny. Since I prepped and you didn't, I was going to say the same thing. How to be more attractive. Yeah, being fully yourself and being secure in who you are. And liking who you are, I think is the most attractive thing. I remember when I was in middle school and there was a new girl, she came in seventh grade and I thought she was the prettiest girl. and I wanted to look like her. I thought there was a standard of pretty. She had blonde curly hair.

4:29 You'd remember her. Shout out to Lisa Elliott. Lisa, I know you're out there. Lisa Trent now. Lisa Trent now. I had beautiful blonde curly hair and I so wanted her hair because I thought there was a universal standard of attractiveness. But one of the things I love so much about getting older is realizing that actually being ourselves and being the best at who we are is the most attractive thing. you are a very handsome man. Well, and I think if Lisa was here, she would admit that both you and Lisa liked me at the time. I don't want to get into it. I didn't like you that year. That is not true. There is no reason for you to lie on this podcast. Seventh grade, I took a hiatus from liking you. I liked you in sixth grade and I liked you in eighth grade. Ladies and gentlemen, do not believe this. I was going to say though, you're a very attractive man. But what I find most attractive about you is your confidence, your security, and that you're fully yourself and that you've embraced your strengths and your weaknesses.

5:24 I just think it's amazing. I love that about you. But I want to say a quick caveat, a shout out to friends. I think friends can make us more attractive. I think we all need the kind of friends that recognize who we are, not who we're just becoming and who we want to be and the changes we want to make. And I know we're all anticipating the new year and all the things we need to improve and do better at. But I just want to say who you are right now listening to this podcast is a walking, talking miracle. And I hope that you got friends around you who will tell you how miraculous you really are and how astounding you really are. And if nothing else, at least this podcast exists to tell you, yes, you, how incredible, grand, and great you really are. That's so true. And if we feel like we have to be somebody else to make our friends happy or to make our friends like us, then we're never actually going to love who we are. And therefore we won't be as attractive. That's right. Okay, number three.

6:17 This one is very fascinating to me. How to be happy alone. Wow. Well, obviously I need to invert this question back upon you because there's never been a person who enjoys being by herself or himself more than you, my love. Chelsea has never, ever, ever, not one time in 22 years of our marriage. We have been together since middle school, which is 122 years. She has never had the fear of missing out. FOMO does not exist in Chelsea Renee Smith makeup. So when it comes to being good at being by yourself, that is you. That is very true.

7:03 Everyone listening thought I was exaggerating and I wasn't. Sometimes you get annoyed at my lack of FOMO because I'm really happy to stay home if I need to. But I found this question very telling of the year that was that there was a lot of isolation, a lot of people who were away from family, away from friends, working from home. So many of the social dynamics of our lives changed this year. And I find it interesting that people found themselves wondering, how can I be happy alone? And I think one of the reasons I am so happy alone is that I have really interesting thoughts. I don't always know how to say them. We're trying to get them out on this podcast, but I just am so interested in the thoughts that I'm thinking. For Enneagram people, I'm an Enneagram 5, and so I like to think deeply and interesting and be curious about whatever I see around me. And I think that a curiosity for the world can really help us to be happy alone.

8:00 We can still be curious about what's happening when we're by ourselves. You express your curiosity through conversation, so I can see how that would be helpful for you. I haven't taken the Enneagram, so I'm whatever number that won't take the test and don't really care. So I don't know what number that is. I'm kidding. I care. I care that you're a five. Everyone tells me I'm a seven and a seven and a seven and a seven. But I don't even know what that means. But I do like the number seven. I think some of the mystics and the great thinkers in days past around faith and God and worldview believe that solitude was a gift. And solitude was an enormous opportunity to worship and give yourself to wonder and think yourself clear. I've been trying to practice solitude as a gift, but I think sometimes if you have too much of it, you start to think that it's a bit of a curse. You answered the question that I was going to interrupt and ask you, and that is obviously being alone fits my personality.

8:53 It is not so much made for your personality, but you have gotten better at it. And solitude is such an interesting thought. one of the things that means solitude for me is actually quiet. I know we live in a world, and maybe this is me being old, I don't know, where I see our kids listen to music all the time with headphones on or music playing or a TV on. And sometimes I just wonder if we need a little bit more silence and if that just would help us to actually be happy or alone, that we aren't so conditioned to fill every moment with noise. Does that make me old that I think that? No, it doesn't. Because I think what you're alluding to is a pretty sacred practice. And for lack of a better term, we'll call it thinking yourself through or thinking yourself clear. Have you thought the thought through? Which is to say, what pervasive thought is on your mind today? Have you thought about it from multiple angles, multiple layers and multiple dimensions? And have you thought yourself through? And I think there's very little of that, it seems today.

9:56 You don't have to think yourself through. You don't have to put yourself, as they say, in the proverbial shoes of another. You don't have to consider the other side of the coin. You don't have to consider what the other team might be thinking. And I think those are powerful, potent practices that God intended for the human experience. And so solitude can provide time and space and width and margin to think yourself through, or in other words, think yourself clear. And that's an interesting question to ask ourselves. When is the last time I gave myself permission to think myself through? If you hear growling on this podcast, it is quite literally my stomach. Stupid intermittent fasting. I can't stand it. I love intermittent fasting. It helps my solitude and thinking myself through. I like that. thinking things through.

10:48 And I do feel like there has been time to do that this year. And people have given ourselves time to think things through. And it's uncovered some beautiful things and some ugly things, but uncovering the ugly things I think has really enabled us to bring health and healing to the ugly things. next one moving on i like this how to be a good boyfriend i'm just picturing all of these 20 year old men if i was your boyfriend i never let you go if i was a boyfriend we're trying to sing i'm picturing all of these men in their 20s and 30s googling how to be a good boyfriend because they're feeling so lost in 2021 for how to be a good boyfriend. I'll tell you exactly how to be a good boyfriend. Please. Here's how to be a good boyfriend. Think like your spouse. Think like your partner. Think like your lover. Think like your friend. Think like them. What do you mean by that. What matters to them? What's valuable to them? What brings fulfillment to them? I feel completely undone now because of the way that you're looking at me right now. So I must be off and I must be wrong. It must be the intermittent fasting. I'm trying to figure out if you're saying think like a woman or you're saying put yourself in the other person's shoes. Yes, correct. Learn what's valuable to them. Learn what's valuable to them. What is important to him? What is important to her? What is their priorities? As opposed to knee jerk is, here's what I want. Here's what I need in this relationship. Here's what I want in this friendship. Here's what I want in this romance. What do they want? And can you make a list of what they want? Okay. It's very similar to my answer that I had prepared, but mine was simply to be a good listener. There it is.

12:52 That was going to be my takeaway. True story. It's like, and if you're wondering, if you're wondering what they want, wondering what they think, there's this magical thing you can do. It's like a magic button you can press. It's called asking questions and listening. Are you fulfilled? How can 2022 be more fulfilling for you? That's why I reacted the way I did to the first time you started talking about to think like the other person, because I love you. We've been married for 22 years and I still cannot read your mind and you still cannot read my mind. And so actually asking questions and listening, not just to what they're saying, but to the level beneath what they're saying and why they're saying that and why are they upset and what buttons did that push and just being a good listener. I don't feel like any spouse or any boyfriend or any dating partner would ever complain if their partner became a better listener. I'll take it way further, like arguably too far.

13:46 And that is, we could dedicate the rest of the lifetime of this podcast in good faith just to helping humanity ask questions and listen. Because asking questions is an art and listening is an art. For instance, listen to the tone. Watch the face. Zoom call, FaceTime, be together. Watch the tone. Watch the face. Watch the expressions. pick up non-verbals while also picking up the verbals? How do you ask questions? By the way, asking questions isn't the right approach. Asking the right questions is the right approach. Sometimes just asking any question is helpful. Google actually has amazing lists of questions to ask on your first date, on your second date, to your best friend. Yes, Google is amazing. I did not know that. They didn't even sponsor this podcast, even though we're talking about it.

14:38 Okay, number six, one that you are also very proficient at. Picture people Googling this in their homes, in their living rooms, isolated. Number six, drum roll, how to be a good kisser. Well, I guess the question is begging to be asked. Do you believe that I am? You are an incredible kisser. I think your lips are the most perfect things on this planet. My issue is the mustache that comes over your lips and prevents me from having perfect contact with the most perfect thing on this planet, which is your lips. Yeah, well, first of all, that's a little bit of an unfair fight already because the mustache has grown a little extra. We were just at our friend's 40th birthday celebration over the weekend. I have not shaved for some two and a half days or so. I admit to that. I willingly admit to that right here on In Good Faith. Having said that, I've really enjoyed the look of the mustache.

15:34 Now we agreed upon a particular length that you enjoy in which I will deliver today. Enjoy is a bit of an expression. Oh, so you're willing to admit it was simply a compromise. Yes, it was a compromise, but it was a good one. Wow. It didn't impede your lips too much. You think the mustache looks pretty cool. Anyway, so how to be a good kisser. I actually think that the thoughts that you think about- If you're a marriage counselor out there, please contact me at 1-800- You just interrupted me. Help me with my marriage. Again, that's 1-800- Help me with my marriage. So I was saying about how to be a good kisser. I think the thoughts that you are thinking about the person when you kiss them make such a difference. That starting slow, just starting with a nice like lip to lip is great. Don't not going in with too much tongue to start out with is also. OK, so we're going to start now talking about the actual details of the anatomy involved in the kissing.

16:34 You literally said tongue and that obviously changes the whole dynamic of this podcast. Yeah. So now we're going to... So I'm in. Okay. So a couple of ways to use the tongue. I'm kidding. Can you imagine? I was going to move on to number seven. Number seven. This is something you should have a decent amount of experience with, not secondhand experience. Excuse me. I have a decent amount of experience with kissing too. Oh yeah. No, I said you were... I said you were well for that one. I thought you were referring that somehow. I love kissing you. It's so fantastic. I love kissing you more than you love kissing me. Probably true. Number seven, how to be a flight attendant. Well, I have absolutely no earthly idea, but I tell you, I've encountered a lot of flight attendants and they're just wonderful human beings. I think they're under excruciating pain and pressure right now. By the way, kudos to people everywhere for wanting to be flight attendants. Exactly. That is the most pressure pack. That's right up there with like a politician making policies right now. I so agree.

17:30 That surprised me that people were searching that last year. Utter shock. Why do you think that is? I'm taken aback. You're taking a bag. Maybe because the flight attendants are under so much pressure. Maybe it's an indication, a sign and a signal of the nobility of humanity. Maybe they're saying they need help and we need to help them and I'm going to get a job. Wow. You believe in humanity's goodness much more than I do. I think it's because we all have not traveled very much and we would love to get back to traveling and becoming a flight attendant is a great way to get out and see the world again. That's exactly what it is. So I was more right than you were? I mean, I had time to think it through beforehand. So that probably helps. Super annoying podcast episode here where you're right, right, right, and then right again. Number eight. Okay. How to be happy with yourself, which actually goes back to what we were talking about, about how to be more attractive.

18:24 But again, people were more isolated, sitting at home more often, didn't have the encouragement surrounding by people to speak life into each other. how to be happy with yourself. Can you imagine individuals sitting down, literally Googling that? Yeah. And I think it's the same reason or the same way to be happy with yourself is the same way you're happy with others. There's a scripture in 1 Corinthians 13, and it says that love keeps no record of wrong. It's actually a financial term, record. The record there in 1 Corinthians 13 is ledger. And it literally means list. And I think people, our nature is we keep a list of our weaknesses, our errors, our wrongs, and our flaws. That's the running list we predominantly keep about ourselves and oftentimes about others. That's why right now a constructive, uncomfortable conversation is hard to find. Thank you, Emmanuel Acho. We love you. Helping us do that better because a lot of people just get fired up, angry and upset because I think we're feeding on lists that are inherently not positive about ourselves and about others. I think 1 Corinthians 13 seems to suggest that love for yourself and love for others starts to keep a list of the beauty, starts to keep a list of the wonder, starts to keep a list of the great things, the good qualities, the amazing personality traits that are God given that God has given you. And I think that's a big part of our future as human beings. We've got to start carrying and keeping running lists of beauty, majesty, wonder, talent, gifts, abilities, character qualities we admire and love in one another.

20:05 And I think we need to start giving them out like gifts. You know what I was thinking the other day about you? You're really great at, like, that's the kind of conversations and encounters and interchanges that we need with each other today. And it starts with ourselves. Are we keeping a list of things we love about ourselves. We should and we can and we could. Absolutely. I love the juxtaposition of this list that people are asking how to be a good boyfriend, how to be a good kisser, but also how do I be happy with myself? That we are searching to love others better and to love ourselves better. And that is reflected in this list. For people who have been keeping track, they would realize that I forgot number four. Number four on the list I skipped. And the reason I skipped it is this is the one that I actually have notes written down by it. Oh man. Number four. Okay. How to be a baddie. How to be a baddie. Do you know what a baddie is? I have no idea what a baddie is. Neither did I. And I am humiliated right now. I'm kidding.

21:20 I'm actually not. I had to go to Urban Dictionary. Well, first I went to Google and I felt like that wasn't the proper definition. Once I read the definition, I'm like, oh yeah, we need more baddies in this world. Oh, tell me. It is a woman in charge, a woman who can take care of herself, be independent and looks good while doing it. How to be a baddie. I actually am a part of the baddie fan club. I didn't know that's what it was described as, but I will go on tour for baddies everywhere. This world would not be as great. I don't even know if the world would exist without baddies. My mom's a baddie. My sister's a baddie. And let me tell you, my wife's a baddie. Oh, thanks. I look good while doing it. There ain't no doubt about that. I love your love for strong women. It's so sexy. Strong women have shaped my life and changed my life. And there would be no church of which we pastor and lead without strong women. So yeah, how does a woman become strong and independent and all of those things?

22:19 First of all, making a list of all the strengths and qualities and characteristics that are God-given and miraculous and incredible and astounding, which every woman inherently possesses and is inherently a queen as orchestrated and given and identified by God, a walking, talking, living miracle. and the oppression that women have endured around the world is nothing short of tragic and devastating and horrific. And so already to be a woman in this world and to be here and to be getting up in the morning and to be going to work or caring for loved ones or family members or neighbors or lovers, you are already a world beater and you're already a miracle. So accepting that, I think, who you are and how great you are. And then this is such a loaded statement, but surrounding yourself with people that feed that.

23:11 Yeah. I think my one issue with the definition of being a baddie was independence because I understand the gist of it, which is I don't need a man to be happy. I don't need a man to enable me to do my job or to live my life. But I think we are created as beings to be interdependent. There is an impossibility of doing our jobs or being completely fulfilled on our own. And so striking a balance between independence and interdependence, I just think it's critical that we are interdependent on the right people, that we're interdependent on people who won't let us down, on people who won't put us down, on people who don't make us small so that they can feel big. And I feel like for so much of the history of women, especially in this last 150 years, we've had to make ourselves smaller so that people could feel, okay, people slash men could feel successful and big and awesome and macho.

24:06 And that's not the kind of interdependence that we're looking for. Thank you so much for what you just said. I think people who make us smaller, we need to transition and connect with people who make us and recognize us for who we are. And there's not a single human being in the eyes of God that is small and insignificant, not a one. And when it comes to women, God has made women with inherent strength and beauty that is so hard to even summarize with adjectives, nouns, and verbs. And so I would say this, that there is a time for all of us where we do feel small. And it's in those moments we need people around us who remind us how great we are and how wonderful we are, but allow us to be broken, allow us to bleed a little bit, allow us to tear up a little bit.

24:59 And I think we all need that. But certainly when considering baddies, or I call them strong, incredible women, even strong, incredible women need a place to bleed, a place to cry, a safe place. Yeah. And I think there is this idea out there. Actually, I got it off of an Amazon commercial that I don't need to be loved to love myself. And I don't know if I totally agree with that. I think we all need to be loved. It may not need to be by a husband. It may not need to be by a mom or a dad, but we need to be loved. We were made and designed to be that way, but we cannot change who we are in order to be loved. And we can't diminish who we are in order to be loved. Well, of course we sit here in the studio and we're persuaded, aren't we, that we are loved, that love is why we're here, that man and woman were created by God as objects and recipients of his love. We are here, quite literally, the highest role a human being can play is to receive the love of the creator, God. And so people oftentimes, I don't know if Google recorded this one, but why am I here? What's the meaning of life? We are persuaded the meaning of life is actually to be loved by God. So by definition, you are loved and make sure you surround yourself with people who remind you of that. And I just think a baddie is a woman who is just so loved for who she is. I just think that is awesome. Okay. Number nine, the true number nine, how to be mindful. And when I hear mindful, I think of the idea of being present, that when you are somewhere, you don't wish you were somewhere else. You aren't thinking about the next thing that you should be doing or want to do, that you are actually present and mindful, giving everything that you have to what you're doing in this moment. And I feel like that's becoming a lost art. So I am very grateful to see the hope in humanity that people are Googling and wondering, how can I become more mindful? Yeah. And if you're out there wondering what is mindful, or maybe that's a trigger word for you, oh gosh, what is mindful? Well, it's the

27:08 opposite of mindless. And think of all the mindless things we do during the day. If you've ever watched someone scroll through Instagram or if you've ever been mindful about your mindlessness, it's fascinating where you see yourself scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, stop, click it, scroll, scroll, scroll, stop, click it, stop, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, and we're just, it's mindlessly just digesting. If you ever scrolled Amazon looking for, recently, I was looking for a black bomber leather jacket, you know, and it was just like, whoa, whoa, whoa, scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll. And it's actually very mindless. The other day we were stuck in traffic and I was watching the gentleman next to me go through an app, a swipe left, swipe right. Dating app. Dating app. And obviously, because you and I got married way before dating apps, we don't have a lot of experience. I was absolutely blown away at how quick he would swipe one direction or the other. It was pretty mindless, actually. It absolutely blew my mind.

28:05 I'm not saying that's wrong. I'm just saying it shocked me. It's like, you aren't reading the incredible descriptions and details to know this person at a deeper level? You just got to ask yourself, does that have an effect? And I think mindfulness is informing us that, hey, when we do take time to, here's the operative word for mindfulness. I truly believe it. Slow down. It doesn't mean you need to slow your car down. It doesn't even necessarily need to change your schedule. but somewhere within the car, within the schedule, within your daily requirements and demands. I think of moms or dads running errands, taking kids to soccer practice, trying to get them to violin practice or single adults with children. I mean, there's so many demands on our lives, but mindfulness says it speaks to this idea that you can actually slow down in the midst of it all. Oh, sorry, did I interrupt? Yeah, but that's okay.

28:57 That's part of your spiritual gift. Go ahead. Yeah, so is yours. It's how we communicate love for each other. It means I love what you're saying that it spurred a great thought in me. Actually, my thought of mindfulness is actually eliminating distractions. I like that too. That when we're watching a TV show, why are we shopping on Amazon at the same time? Or looking on Instagram or playing a game? Or like last night we were watching Jingle All The Way and you were playing a video game? Yeah. Okay. But that's because I've watched that movie every year with our kids and I was very tired and that was the only way to stay. That's true. Shout out to Sinbad. Yeah, it was great. But eliminating distractions, having a meal, this sounds so cliche, but putting our phones away while we have a meal. Reading a book and just whatever that we're doing, as many distractions as we can eliminate, I feel like enables us to be significantly more mindful of that activity that we're doing. And slowing down is definitely a requirement for that.

29:51 Okay, number 10, my favorite of the whole list. This is it, the climactic conclusion. You'll figure out why it's my favorite. Number 10 people Googled in 2021 of how to questions was how to be romantic. Oh, isn't that amazing? Do I ever cross your mind anytime? Do you ever wake up reaching out for me? That's how I do it. That's how you be romantic. You just sing to me. And that's it, girl. It's very lovely. I love that the world is still looking for love. Yeah, that makes me happy. And of course, the answer to this is very simple. It's boys to men. I mean, this is the easiest one you've asked of me. This is boys to men. It's our age. We went to their Vegas show, remember? It was so good. I had a smile on my face the whole time. What do you think is key to being romantic?

30:44 What does romantic mean to you, by the way? Well, the irony is that mindfulness is a big part of romance, right? It's like being there, being present now. You got a little bit of a head start because of the wild and crazy world we live in and technological age and we're all traveling at the speed of light rather than the speed of love and life. So I think just slowing down to love and life rather than light. And I think that's incredibly romantic. I know when you are off your phone and you're so much more on your phone than I am. That was a joke, guys. But yeah, slowing down and making eye contact. You know, did you say, how do I define romance? Yeah. I think romance is when you feel loved and when the person you love feels loved. And then of course, romance implies a little more than just love. It also implies, you know, attraction and contact and, you know, tender, sexy care. It's different than, you know, just buddies and friends. Okay. Yeah. I didn't prepare this beforehand, but once we got to, and thinking about romance, I realized, I don't know the definition of romance.

31:52 What do we mean when we're asking about how to be romantic? And I realized that to me, it is thoughtfulness that if we're going into a date and you have made a reservation, or you've thought about what we're going to do beforehand, or you thought about getting flowers, or you thought about a gift that feels so romantic to me, just to know that when you weren't around me, you were thinking about me and planning and preparing something simply because you thought I might like it and enjoy it. That is so romantic and sexy. Yeah, totally. And I have a pretty similar definition to romance. Mine is tiny lingerie. It's a great one. It is that. Also very thoughtful. Does that resonate with you? Yep. It's pretty much what your Christmas gifts are. So your Christmas gifts are going to be very romantic. That's what your Christmas gifts are too. Lots of tiny lingerie in the Smith family. She thinks I'm joking and I think she's joking. That's what's funny about this. It's going to be real. Oh man. Well, there is the top 10 how-to list of 2021, but we want to leave a toolkit. Obviously this is our last podcast of the year.

33:01 And for our toolkit, we actually wanted to go back to something that your dad did often. And growing up, he was our pastor. We grew up in his church. And every last service of the year, he would do this ritual. We'd walk into church and he would hand us these cards. And these cards would say simply, what do you want to leave behind in 1997? Or whatever the year is. The year we graduated high school. And so the toolkit for us today, as we think about this last podcast of the year, before we step into the new year, what are the things that you want to leave behind? I think what we're really suggesting too is talk about mindfulness and thoughtfulness is what if you got a piece of pen out, a piece of paper and a pen, and literally wrote down a few things you want to leave in 2021 and not take into 2022. Now that might seem arbitrary, but I think science shows and certainly our experience shows that that can make a really drastic difference.

33:59 For instance, grudges could be one. I want to leave grudges behind. A lot of people have died in 2021. Every year people pass. Every day people pass. But 2021, the amount of people who have passed at such a young age is really almost overwhelming. And what that does is it kind of sobers us up again to the brevity and the nature of the fragility of this life. And I think it just kind of alludes to, oh man, let's forgive. Let's let go. Let's love. That's a loaded question. There are many people listening right now who've been hurt at a level that is hard for even Chels and I to understand. So I want to say that very carefully, but you could literally just write down grudges and that'll do something for you. It's interesting because my thing that I'm leaving behind in 2021 is I have had stories this year of wrong things that I've done or wrong things that have been done to me that I've rehearsed in my mind and conversationally. And I'm making a commitment to leave those stories behind. I'm not going to tell those stories anymore to myself, to others. I'm just going to absolutely leave those stories behind and not focus on them or think about them anymore. I'm going to leave behind the need to fix things all the time. Now, I can't fix anything in our home, our actual tangible home, but much of my life oftentimes can turn into trying to fix things for people in their heart, their mind, their soul, their friendships, their relationships, the job of a pastor. Instead of fixing things, instead of trying to fix people and fix things. I want to let go and trust and pray and rely and worship. And so I want to have less conversations about fixing stuff and more conversations about faith.

36:03 I love that. I just think it's so beautiful that we get a new year, that we get a new start, that we can take a moment to stop and realize, I think there's some things I'm going to leave behind. And maybe there's some things that we want to pick up in 2022. But for now, we just get to think about what are the things I want to drop and leave behind? And even leaving a picture of leaving room in your hands to pick up something new, to pick up something that's going to aid you instead of something that's going to hinder you. And I just think that is such an incredible gift that we all get to think about this week, that we are about to have a new year, which means we get a new start and we can leave some things behind. Will you pray for us for the new year? Absolutely. God, we thank you so much for the minutes that we have shared here through technology and podcasting. We can sit with each other and think, and we thank you for the ability to do so. It is a gift. God, we look back on the year that was, and we also say thank you. Thank you that we're still here. Thank you that our heart is beating. Our lungs are breathing. You are good.

37:11 As we turn out to a new chapter, a new season and a new year, we thank you. Your ancient scripture says, behold, you make all things new. Thank you for a sense of newness. I ask for a skip in our step and a twinkle in our eye as we look into the future with faith and hope. Thank you for new beginnings and new starts. I pray, Lord, for strength, stamina, energy, and joy for each and every one of us for 2022. In your name, amen.