Protecting Your Energy with Jason Kennedy and Lauren Scruggs Kennedy

3:04 Yes. So I love that we're covering this topic because I feel like it's something that isn't talked about much, but it's one of the most important things to have just quality in your life and something to almost be like self-aware of. So I was in a bad accident about 10 years ago, which is crazy. It's been 10 years. Wow. Yeah. It'll be 10 years in December. I was hit by a plane propeller. I lost my left hand and my left eye and had traumatic brain injury and then a lot more injuries that I actually recently found out about. So my brain healed very quickly in the hospital. But I remember my neurosurgeon telling me, he was like, you're not going to have normal energy back in five years. Your energy will come back. And I was like, OK. And I never will forget that statement because I was almost like counting down. But the interesting thing was I'm from Dallas, Texas.

4:00 So I was with my family and my friends and our pace was a lot slower, even though my parents are very social and I can be very social in a lot of ways, even though I'm an introvert. But I didn't really see a struggle with my energy a lot during those first few years. And then Jason, I started dating and would come out to L.A. And for the most part, it felt okay when I'd come visit. But when we got married, I think I was also hit with this emotional reality that I had left my home and my family and my friends. And everyone there knew, you know, everything about my healing and my accident and all that. And then no one here really knew any of that. So it was almost reliving a lot of things and telling Jason a lot of things that he didn't know and was wanting to learn. I was hit with just this emotional whirlwind, which I feel like y'all were a big part of that during some of our struggle times of, I think, just like accident anger that was coming out as I was reliving it.

5:09 And then just like, I can't believe I'm away from my comfort and all these different things, even though there was so much excitement at the same time, like being married to Jason and living together and experiencing a new city and all that. But I was hit with just such crazy fatigue where I was just having a hard time even staying awake around dinner time. And Jason, as y'all know, especially at that time. So it was interesting as we were combining our two lives, but we had dated long distance for the whole time until we were engaged. And so we were both just living our almost single lives in a way. And my pace was so slow. And Jason's pace was like doing something every night with his friends. Well, not every night. I would say Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday.

6:02 I don't know. It was so funny. Yeah, and sometimes Thursday. And Saturday. A few times Tuesday. And Sunday brunch. So, you know, yeah, every now and again. We don't have to get into the details. I truly remember I was living with my best friend, and I was like, I would be on the phone with Jason. He's like, what are you doing today? I'm like, oh, just, you know, watching Friends with AB. And I'm like, what are you doing? And he's like, well, I'm going to this event, and then we're going to dinner, and then we have another event. We're going to stop by with this person, this person, this person. And I'd be like, amazing. our lives I feel like socially were just so different it should be noted though that no one has ever been a bigger fan of the show friends than you in the history of mankind and friends has meant a lot to you and then to add to that side note when we first got married I came home and I was like trying to tell her about my day because apparently we never saw each other enough it was going to too many events but she was she Phoebe was saying something interesting and she wasn't paying attention to me and we went to counseling over friends because I felt like she couldn't hear me out but this is not for me to interject let's go back to fatigue nor can we really blame friends for creating uh such a divide between you two but yeah it's really tough it gets into your marriage i think actually friends made me feel like i've actually heard this so many times but it is like a comfort in a weird way when you do feel like you're creating community because you're seeing their community so it's comforting we're just so deep totally it truly is what a lot of people say about why they love it so much but um so meanwhile i'm out in hollywood doing events guys on red carpets and blue carpets and pink carpets as you guys know one of his absolute best qualities the way he connects and brings people together and socializes i truly have never seen anything like it in the best way it's been incredible and just what a deep community has been built through y'all but through him specifically when i came to la like i feel like there are just so many people around us because of the intention he put into that which is so

8:11 incredible but back to the energy it created a lot of conflict in a way and loneliness on my end because um i feel like i was as you know telsa can be like a very lonely experience because it's really hard to describe the actual like tiredness and it's like bone tired where you can't you can barely function so I remember one night Jason like it actually like I saw it like click in his head and things got like so much better after that I feel like in his mind it was just like oh you're tired and you want to stay home no problem see you later and where I was like I really want to be next to you and that may look like doing nothing special but just being here because I I want someone just with me because I don't know the city very well and I'm away from all my people and all these things so that was at the very beginning when I felt like I didn't really know anyone super well to where I could call someone to come over or whatever so So yeah, it's like that was a big adjustment.

9:20 It's so crazy you say that because when Judah and I got married, I moved cities as well. And I wasn't fighting any kind of fatigue at that point. But that feeling of, I only have one person in this city who I can sit around in my pajamas with and be at home with and not expend any energy on that. I can't imagine, Lo, you combining that with the fatigue that you faced post-injury. I dealt with chronic fatigue that I was super quiet about. I barely even talked about it. It was from a very different set of circumstances. Well, and can I just say, though, for our listeners, that I actually think you were experiencing fatigue even early on in our marriage because it was social fatigue. Like Jason and I, we get, I mean, we literally just were together for four straight days right before this podcast recording. And we get energized by being around a bunch of different people, new friends, old friends, you know, and having engaging conversations. We come home energized from that.

10:14 But we realized we married ladies, incredible best friend life partners who don't get energy that way. So I think what's amazing about what Lauren has done is, Lauren, not only is your disposition of personality, you get energized a little bit more privately like Chell, which is such a perfect parallel. But on top of that, the trauma and the accident you went through, I feel like you've been very courageous. Can I just say that before we go any further on this podcast? because a lot of what you have been willing to go towards in your foundation, in what you do publicly, in content you put out is courageous and that it's not as popular. It's growing in popularity, but you've been doing this now for a decade, trying to help people who silently, I think, are suffering with social anxiety, fear, and just an inability to manage their own energy in social settings.

11:10 Yeah. Does that make sense? Absolutely. And I know I felt this, but I'm wondering if you guys did. Did you feel any shame or inadequacy that you didn't have enough energy to show up where you wanted to be or where you felt like Jason wanted you to be? Did either of you deal with those things? I definitely felt that way, for sure. I think I would be, yeah, I'm also a nine on the Enneagram.

11:36 What does that mean? So just like such a peacemaker and wanted everything to be comfortable and all those things, especially for Jason and me entering his life truly is like such an honor, even though I know it's important to have my own life too. But it was just such a sweet experience. I wanted it to just work out really well. And so not being able to participate was definitely shameful for me. And Jace, Lo said you had a light bulb moment where something changed. What caused you to really, truly understand? Because I see the two of you now and the understanding and love and compassion that you have for your wife is what I feel like any person fighting this journey would love to have by their side. That's right. But what happened with you? How did you get to this place where you were such an incredible partner? I think it was just a general understanding after multiple conversations. And I said, it's not that she just doesn't want to hang.

12:36 She misses me. She feels alone. And I had to really figure out my priorities. I felt like my, you know, yes, work is you got to work, right? You got to bring money home. You know, you've got responsibilities. But there are other things. Maybe, you know, we do our church service and stuff. And then I, but then it was almost like after every Wednesday night, well, let's get 15 people and go to dinner. That was a given. Well, that's something we do. We're going to dinner after service. And to shake that up was really difficult for me because I look forward to those conversations. But yet, Lowe's at home. And, you know, we're only a year, a couple years into our marriage. So I finally got it. I mean, I think with maturity, I think with understanding. But overall, what I've learned from you guys is over communicating. We over communicated and we're, hey, how do you feel? And well, how do you feel tomorrow? How do you feel in this moment? How do you think you're going to feel in a few days from now?

13:34 It was always tired, tired, tired. And that's tough when you're an extrovert. And that's tough when you draw so much from being around people. But I realized the importance of if your wife's not happy, then I'm not going to even be in these social situations. And I'm not going to be able to enjoy it if I know she's back at home. So I think we just, yeah, we really talked it out. and through experience and time i i slowly started to understand it but it definitely was a learning experience because it's not talked about a lot i think it could be a really lonely feeling and i i feel like understanding that it can feel like if i don't have energy i'm like against what jason's doing i think that was a big thing is knowing i'm actually not against that i and your biggest supporter and being social and all these things but when he finally understood it was validating my energy and was showing care to me it made me so excited when he went out to do things with his friends which is how it is now like even this last weekend i'm like obviously i miss him so much there's that side of it but it was also like i'm so pumped for you like you're going to have the best weekend i'm excited because i'm going to be alone question love so our husbands were just away for a couple days did you do anything all weekend no me either it was a dream right i had to take my kids shopping because my son outgrew his shoes but other than that i did didn't do one thing and i was happy as could be but you know what i think oh i got so many comments and questions, but you go. I think Jason, what has made you great at your job also made you succeed in this circumstance and situation. And that is that you are such a good listener. You're so good at listening to what people say or saying, but not just what they're saying, what's happening underneath and even the layer underneath that. And I think the ability that you had to listen and to communicate with your wife and to keep listening until you understand hand is such a gift and such a rare quality these days.

15:40 Thanks, Chelsea. Yeah, I think it's important to point out if you're on the other side of the coin here and you're not experiencing the fatigue, understanding what Lo just said, it's not about your significant other not wanting you to be with your friend. She's not trying to keep you from where you thrive, keep you from the people that you want to be around. It has nothing to do with that. They're for you. They're for that. But it's about understanding their needs first. That's what we signed up for in the best possible way. So really, really understanding that. Lo wants me to be around my buddies like Judah, but it can't always be like that. I need to understand her needs first. And when you connect like that and you put in time, it's going to change your relationship like crazy in the best possible way. But you just have to reprioritize.

16:34 That's right. And I think, Jason, what you and I have had to learn, and in obviously the case of you two, because of the compounded effect of Lowe's experience and trauma and accident, even more acutely, is that the culture that we live in, which we love, we're not against the culture. But the most popular concepts in our culture in terms of the social experience is things like work ethic, right? This is the Western world. We celebrate work ethic. We celebrate people who grind. We celebrate people who say, I put in 60, 70 hours a week. And this is what we celebrate. We celebrate the success stories, entrepreneurs and business leaders and thinkers and scientists and tech. And when all of a sudden you, like Lo or Chels, having nothing to do with some sort of a poor choice or some sort of like you drank diet It coked too much and it hurt your body.

17:31 Like you didn't do anything. It's just the reality of, in some cases, the way God made you as an introvert and then things that happened to you that were outside of your control. But I think what hurts my heart today as we're recording this is that there are millions of people in this country and probably billions who feel embarrassed, humiliated, secretly shamed because they can't keep up with the Joneses. They can't keep up with the pace. And I think where Jason and I are like, let's do it. This is fun. You know, and I remember, for those that don't know, we started a Bible study in Jason's home before Jason Lowe were married. And it's mushroomed into this pretty significant, large community that meets at a theater in Beverly Hills. But we just were having fun, to be honest. We were baptizing our friends in Jason's pool. We were laughing, having dinners and thought it was great.

18:25 But again, if you weren't wired like Jason and I, that must have been taxing and fatiguing. Yeah, I mean, you're talking about keeping up with the Joneses. I mean, I ended up where I ended up because I was trying to keep up with you. Period. Period. And drag our three kids along on the journey of going back and forth. And keep in mind that oftentimes my perspective was you should keep up with me. It's your job to keep up with me. And that's humiliating to admit. Well, I think the humiliation for me came in the part of there is so little understanding around a lack of energy. Lo, when you said tired to the bone, I immediately understood exactly how you feel. Because unless you've experienced that, when someone says, I'm sorry, I have to cancel plans tonight. It feels like, oh, I just I'm not really in the mood. I don't feel like it. I would just rather stay home and watch a TV show. When you know that tired to the bone feeling, it's not a choice. It's not just I can push through.

19:22 And I have pushed through. And I know if I do, I'll end up on the sofa for three days and I will pay for it. But if you don't understand that, the shame around that, like you said, just, well, I'm not working hard enough. I'm not social enough. I'm not friendly enough. I'm not keeping up with the most energetic. I'm just not strong enough. Yeah, I'm not strong enough. I know you have faced that. Have you felt that low? Oh, yeah. because I was married to Jason, I'm like representing him in a certain way. So it's like, if I can't keep up kind of like what you were saying, Chels, with Jace, and I would always, I would always think I'm like, that person probably thinks I'm just so boring. And I would have, I would create all these assumptions in my head that were just not true. And then I feel like Jason, it's so easy to like, look at a situation from how you would view it. So it's like, Jason's thinking, but why wouldn't you want to come? Like, it's so fun. Like, it's so much fun. And I'm like, but why wouldn't you want to stay home? I don't know, be comfy. And like, you know, because I'm here. I don't know. So it's just funny how it's almost like that love language conversation where you like love how you like to be loved. It's almost like you're thinking how you think towards that other person's situation, which is so different. So I think it's having a broader mindset of let me understand the thoughts that you have in making these decisions and how you're viewing my situation and then I need to do the same or I'm doing that with you you do that with me yep and it's easier said than done but it I feel like when that happens is when there's just so much peace and balance and compromise like I feel like we both have compromised a lot with our social plans and to a point where we both feel.

21:07 Yeah. It clicked for sure. I get it now. Took me a little while. We're wired completely different. But I remember vividly some friends going, oh, let me guess. Lo's tired. She's not going to come tonight. And I was like, yeah, she's tired. I'm positive that Chelsea, you helped because I started understanding through Judah what you were going through. And I thought to myself, Chelsea and Lo are going to be good friends because they get each other. And then you guys really connected and bonded. And I think that was the start of a great friendship between the two of you. But it opened my eyes. So finding someone that's going through the same thing. And if you can then just chip away mentally at your stubborn, significant others who sometimes are a little blinded by the fact that we just need to get out and do our thing and see people. it will slowly start to make sense to us. And yeah, the grind is crazy though, right?

22:04 Like going back to what you're saying, I think the grind can kill people. And I understand so many people can say, oh, that's, well, that just means you don't have to work as hard as we do. You work hard, don't get me wrong, but you also do a lot of things on top of working hard. And, you know, a lot of mental energy of I got to keep up with this person or I have to be a certain way or say certain things. And I think mentally that can be taxing on you as well. I've talked to so many people in the entertainment industry and they're just burnt out. They're tired. And I think the blessing of COVID, you know, as hard as that was and all the tragedy that came with that is we had to pause. We were forced to pause. We were forced to slow down. We were forced to evaluate the important things. And God closed a lot of doors in our life. And he opened up other doors and don't take that time for granted.

23:01 I think some really, some really significant things happened personally for us and so many other people around the world. Don't forget about that time. Obviously, we're still going through it, but just evaluate what happened and where you're at mentally. And, you know, yeah, Judah, you said, I think a couple months ago, I'll never forget it. You were talking to one of your mentors and they were saying like, this is 10 years. It's probably going to take for us to recover from what that did. So think about, yeah, just think about the changes and think about how, you know, you want your life to be different because of what we went through. Yeah. Another thought I was thinking too, is when I'm not doing well emotionally, I'll like, this isn't always the case. Sometimes I'm actually doing it out of need, but I'll like start online shopping. So if there's a lot of boxes coming, Jason's like, are you doing okay?

23:56 I know you're emotional when there's seven boxes. I'm not kidding. There are so many boxes. Because you can return everything. I don't know why it just like feels nice. She returns most of the stuff, but yeah. It's because you feel like you're accomplishing something. I know I've done that. I don't have any energy. I can't go anywhere, but I feel like I need to accomplish something. And this is something that I can do. I have been there. Really have. This is true. That makes sense when you're saying it, Chelsea, but it also, I couldn't be more different. Completely.

24:29 Jason doesn't even know how to order an Amazon. It's like the best thing ever. I like to go to the outlets. Guy's a TV host. It's different for those guys. For Jason, I feel like I notice when he's not maybe doing the best emotionally when he's processing things, he'll like kind of go manic socially. Like he'll, it's a way to like deflect and like not sit and be, and like actually think through things that are going on. It's because I like see it, it's different than just his normal, like social thing. It's where it's like, it can't, it like will not stop. And it's like, there's something going on here. It's like a sign to me. Don't you think learning your triggers and your partner's triggers and your coping mechanisms is one of the beauties of being married for more than a minute for staying at it for as many years as you have and we have. But I found myself, I hate the word, actually, I'm triggered by the word triggered. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. But I have found myself triggered lately thinking about coming out of COVID as more things are happening, more things are opening up.

25:38 I found myself a little bit panicked and anxious wondering, am I going to be able to keep up again? Am I going to burn myself too thin? And whether it's coming out of COVID, Lo, you're so amazing. You started a business and a foundation and a company and having a baby. As you think about the future, what are the skills and the practical things that both of you are doing to really manage your energy and keep yourself at a healthy, consistent pace? I mean, she asked you, baby. I don't want to jump in. It was both of you. I was just being a gentleman. For me, I guess it's, I've really learned to give off tasks to someone that can do it well, that I don't have to do to save myself energy and time. And then I think a lot of just like boundary, I think a huge thing, I was listening to a sermon yesterday and it was saying, we look at our phones about 2,600 times a day.

26:42 Whoa. Or a hundred of those times are actual like work or something like you need to do. And so like an average of 2200 of the times is looking at social media or like, I am amazed. Like it's like pumping you up like personally and you're feeling good about yourself. You're getting likes, you're getting comments on Instagram, like whatever it might be. And I was like, I feel like it would just be so good to set really strict boundaries, which y'all are incredible at with your phone, because it just, we've been talking about it. Cause I'm like, will you help me be better? And I'll help you be better. Cause so many times that we're like together, but we're really not. We're like just coexisting on our phones, like sometimes all day. And I'm like, I want more than that. And like, I don't want to lose our connection.

27:35 And it's actually really frustrating. But it's partly what I'm doing too. It's not just Jace. But I'm like, why are we so addicted to our phones? It's also frustrating when you start calling each other out. You can make a pact to do that, but know that that's going to cause fights. No question. Because if one person is on their phone, the other person is going to say, hey, you need to hop off your phone. You've been on it too much. And then you're like, well, I'm working right now. Or I have to finish this up. There's a reason I'm on. And vice versa. as well. So just know that that's going to produce some problems. You have to work through that, because that's happened a couple of times. We're talking about now tools, tools when you're tired, you know, and I think where, if we're honest, us four, where we sit, none of us here in this conversation work a classic nine to five job. Right. And so any insightful listener now can go, wow, must be nice. You know, must be nice. You know, you guys don't have a nine to five job. I'm sure you're managing your energy. But but I think what you've just said is so important, because for those who are like, listen, I'm a high school teacher. First of all, you're our hero. OK, teachers everywhere, you're our hero.

28:58 But I think the concept of like energy management or finding time for vacations, you know, is like really nice for you guys to sit there and talk about that. But the reality is what you've just said, I think the stat's outrageous about how many people have phones in the world. And what you've just said, Lo, it doesn't matter what your occupation is. It doesn't matter what your schedule is, what your timeframe is. You're saying, hey, look, we look at our phones on average 2,200 times a day and you might go, well, I'm doing work. No, the stats tell us only 400 of those times you're actually working. So right here, you've already given us a tool, no matter who you are, where you are, what continent, country, or language you speak, you're saying, hey, what if you cut down on that 2200 number? I bet you'll have a little more space in your brain, in your body, in your soul to give energy to things that matter so significantly more and frankly will improve your overall well-being right yeah i love getting things done but i'm also an introvert so for me my phone is more about getting things done and for jace he's like a news junkie news junkie and social person so it's his way of connecting so it's like it's we use our phone for different things for the most part but it's like really navigating how to almost like compartmentalize that time of when you're on the phone and then really like being in moments there have been times we'll run errands together i'm like so excited we were laughing the other day because jason's like so how how are you doing this morning and a text pops up on his car and he like pressed his play and i like literally i'm in the middle of answering and it's like a text being read out i was like why would you do that i'm a little ocd that's just the problem same but it's but it's like seriously I'm such a jerk in those moments I'll say oh who's interrupting our date right now oh my gosh who's interrupting our marriage that's more that's my aggressive line it's not great interrupting our marriage like the whole body of work has been interrupted

31:05 I know I'm like this is such special time like so I don't know but it goes with expectations but also like that time for me together is so enriching when we're not distracted by anything and then i feel like our phones we probably don't realize how much energy that like consumes and yeah i just don't think our minds are prepped for what we're doing right now we're not made to handle this emotional workload even when i was working i mean i'd finished a quote unquote nine to five for the past 16 years and i i would still come home and i'd just be on my phone looking at news articles and stuff like that. And now when I'm not per se shooting every single day, I still find myself on my phone a ton. And it actually, now it's, it's not necessarily a headache, but it's a feeling in your brain of like, I can't even, my eyes hurt too much content.

32:05 So what can you do, whether you're single or in a relationship to figure out something that works for you? So my new thing is if I ever start feeling that I put my phone down immediately, I'll throw it on airplane mode. I'm done with it. I'm going to go work out. I'm going to go for a walk. I'm going to go have a conversation. And I've got a lot of progress there that I need to work on. But I started doing that. And the few times I have, since we just implemented this, it's been an absolute game changer. Wow. But I think also realizing like, y'all know that connection is so energizing, even if you don't have a lot of energy. like just like connecting just like the two of you without a phone and I just think it's like a good thing to have a tool to know how to put boundaries on your phone and y'all can probably share so much with that because you do such a good job I just want to say to put your phone on airplane mode is very courageous because you never know what you're going to be missing or what could be coming through. And so I'm so amazed that you do that. I would say for me over the years, the thing that saved us, because I had probably two years where I had to plan out every single thing I did for energy management. I couldn't just do what I wanted when I felt like doing it.

33:28 But in those two years, the one thing we kept consistent, well, I will say this. I was a very good wife. I saved my energy for sex and we still had a lot of really good sex. We did. If I only have energy for one thing today. I realized when your energy is limited, prioritizing is so important. What is actually the most important thing for me to do? And for me, the number one thing, and Lo, you alluded to this with prioritizing is what are the things that only I can do? What are the things that nobody else can do besides me on the planet? And truthfully, at the top of my list is Sex with Judah. Nobody else can do that. And so that was a priority for me. But what I got reciprocated from that was you kept our date night consistent and that we've always had a consistent date night. And you are so good on date night at putting your phone away, leaving your phone in the car. I only take my phone in in case of emergencies. And creating that boundary was really amazing.

34:23 And I think probably more than other than Jesus and worship and prayer that the sex and date night probably got me through. And now thinking coming out of COVID, like, gosh, we need to make sure we're really sticking to those things. Yeah, absolutely. I think for me personally, in fact, it happened last night, Jason and I were at a dinner with two of our closest friends and I hadn't seen Chelsea, obviously in a few days. All of us have been away from our significant others. And I text her something just so out of left field that had nothing to do with love, care, concern. We've been gone. We haven't seen each other and, you know, hurt her feelings. And I even told Jason, I think I hurt Chelsea's feelings. By the way, Chelsea, he was so nervous when you, I didn't know how you responded. He kept that private, but he did say that you were upset and he was spinning. And after how many years of marriage? After 22 years of marriage, so many husbands I feel like would be like, ah, she gets me.

35:19 She knows me. I'll talk to her when I get home. He was, he had to get up, walk away from the table. He was still talking about it 10, 15 minutes later, and he wanted to make sure you were okay. and his night wouldn't continue until you were better. And I love that. Those are the things that I take away from your relationship that help so many of us that know you guys or listen to you. The worst part is I wasn't even that bad. I just wanted to communicate, hey, that felt a little jarring. And then Grace took my phone and did online shopping, by the way, for an hour. And so he kept responding. So I just kept texting. That's why I never told you anymore, Jace. I'm like, because she just didn't respond. And so I was like, well, I guess I'm, I am coming home to, you know, it's going to be a journey tonight. Except our flight was so delayed, she was asleep. So we're good. I think having friends and being able to communicate that to Jason even last night. And I'll say this, I think both Jason and I have learned together in relationship to you two and your journey of energy, not to overreact.

36:18 And here's my point in what I have learned. for those who are dealing with anyone in their world that's tired and tired on a more regular basis. We're all tired, by the way. So this podcast relates to all of us. If it doesn't relate to you, you are Superman, Superwoman, Catwoman, or Batman. Can I be tired or anxious or depressed? Or depleted. There's so many categories. There really is. And I would say what I've learned is don't overreact and realize that your energy isn't endless and you got to use it somewhere. And I think what you just said, Chella's so profound because you decided, and you were way ahead of me on this, that, listen, I can only use my energy in certain places, so I'm going to prioritize where I do it. Where I think my personality, and I want to project on Jason as well because I don't want to be alone, was like, you just kind of give it, give it, give it, give it because it'll always be there. And then I would come home, babe, you know, this is true.

37:12 And I would, even after like, you know, being on a weekend with Jace, I would come home and just crash when I got to you because I had used all of my energy on others and then I had nothing left for you. And so I would encourage people, particularly extroverts that are listening, hey, you don't have endless energy either. And particularly when you are in relationship, romance, friendship, or parenting with other human beings who may not be extroverts or maybe are, are you preserving energy for your priorities, the people you prioritize? and that's something that even last night, I know this might sound silly, but I was like, I'm not going to overreact. And the reason I didn't want to overreact is not because I didn't want to fight. Sometimes fighting is good. It's because I knew I needed the energy, but I think what's important is understanding that you don't have endless energy and you want to prioritize where you use it.

38:05 And honestly, babe, you've taught me that. Lo has taught me that. And I think Jason and I together learning from the both of you. Yeah, you guys have exemplified that. I've learned so much from Chels. Yeah. I've learned so much. I remember one time there was a situation we were all talking about and you're like, your best, you were saying about Judah, even though y'all had already discussed it, but it's like your best energy is you. So I'm left with your, like the leftovers kind of. And I will never forget that because I'm like, I think about it all the time. Cause I'm like, I want to give my best energy to my priorities and including Jace and all these things. And I actually was talking to a friend the other day about like pregnancy because it almost feels that same way. Cause I've just been so tired or like nauseous and it'll hit me out of nowhere. And I have that same like shameful feeling if I have to cancel a plan, but it's usually most of our friends have never been pregnant or they were pregnant a while ago. And so I'm like, do they think I'm just being flaky? Like what's, I don't know. And so it's revisiting that. And then we were talking about just surrounding yourself with friends that are in that same season that actually understand it almost like what we were talking about, how we've learned from y'all so much as we've tried to handle like the energy thing but it's like meeting with another couple and becoming friends with them that they're about to have a baby and they're going through pregnancy and just understanding like the energy there so I feel like it's important to like create that community in like a similar life phase because I feel like it's hard to do that out here because we have so many single friends we have so many dating friends we have so many married friends with children y'all's age.

39:57 And so anyways. Yeah. But I think in true Jason Lowe fashion, you guys will create that community and make it beautiful. And you guys will pioneer the way to help so many other people. As we bring our conversation to a conclusion, Jason, I'd love to hear any final thoughts that you have in this. I was reading my Bible the other day and a verse struck out to me that talks about- Oh, she's spiritually bragging now. Yeah, yeah, right? So spiritual. I was on my third hour of scripture reading. All right, here we go. Welcome to In Good Faith. Shels loves your Bible. I do. She does.

40:47 It was a new translation. It basically talked about, hey, one of the things that naturally happens when we walk with Jesus is that we are able to marshal and direct our energy wisely. Wow. And I just thought, oh, okay, that can become a natural fruit of walking with Jesus, that we can learn how to marshal and direct our energy wisely. And I was like, that's what I believe for me, for you, for so many of us who do have to manage energy and who don't feel like we have an endless supply, that we can have that. We can get better and better at it as we continue to learn more and more and get wisdom, but also just walking with Jesus and walking with friends who we can get understanding from, I think is so important. We chose this topic to talk about because it has been such a significant deposit in our life, watching you both manage your energy. And I think there's so much honor when it comes to honoring each other's energy.

41:45 And I don't necessarily mean aura as much as I mean physical stamina and strength to live every day. And I think we have got a major, massive misnomer in the Western world. And I live in the Western world, so I don't know if I can speak for the whole world, but my experiences in the Western world is that we assume upon each other that we all have the same amount of stamina and strength for each day, when in reality, that is not true. And the scripture makes it clear that that's not true. We're all very uniquely individual before God. And I think watching you two, I mean, frankly, for those that don't know, you have Jason, who is probably the most skilled social person I have ever met in my whole life. Jason Kennedy carries the greatest social skills that I've ever seen. And I think you get energy using that to empower other people, where Lowe is one of the most considerate, kind, strong entrepreneurs who also gets incredible energy from creating a home that is the coziest, most tranquil experience.

42:48 And I've told you guys this multiple times, coming over to your home is like if restoration hardware and like the greatest yoga instructor like got together to provide an environment, that's your home. And that comes from you, Lo, and the way that God's designed you to get energy from creating a safe space at home as an introvert. And so you two are actually a wonderful case study in very extreme ways that you energize other and you get energy. But to see you both honor each other in the process, I hope that you do put pen to paper. I hope that you do write a book someday of how God has brought you two together and learned how to manage each other's energy and honor each other in the process. Because I think it's set you up to really serve millions of people around the world who are silently struggling in this area.

43:43 can't figure out why they're always fatigued, always tired, or maybe just always making their significant other angry because they're constantly trying to get them to get energy in a way that actually doesn't give them energy. That's so sweet and so wise. What a beautiful ending. That was so, so incredible. We love you guys to pieces. We're so glad that you're doing this and we're tremendously honored to be a part of it. I wish everyone can see you in your gray Heather sweatshirts together, holding each other like the cutest couple in the history of mankind. Love you so much. Love you, Jason. Thank you for your time. Seriously, this was amazing. And thanks for coming on in good faith. This has been a presentation of OBB Sound, SB Projects, and Cadence 13. Executive produced by Chelsea Smith, Judah Smith, Michael D. Ratner, Scott Ratner, Elias Tanner, Scooter Braun, Scott Manson, James Shin, and Chris Corcoran.

44:51 Produced by Grace Delia. Co-produced by Kyle Vanuja of SB Projects. Produced by Lauren LaGrasso and Serena Reagan of Cadence 13. Edited, mixed, and mastered by Adam Macias Original composition by Colin Gileard Production support from Rachel Cruz OBB Sound is an OBB Media Company Cadence 13 is an Odyssey Company